I GIVE UP!!!

ReboundMuslimah

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I have had enough of everything! My trials, my family especially my sister. Every time I get in an argument she uses my problem against me which I have no control of.* It makes me very emotional because it's something I have dealt with the past 7-8 years and it has been one of the things that has made my life miserable and to her to use it against me just made me break down today. I am not the one to ever commit suicide but I feel like there's nothing left in this earth for me. Wallahi I just want Allah to take me already. I can't handle these trials anymore. You guys didn't get all the details only one sister on here knows but I'm sure you'd kill yourself too if you got my trials. I am just tried and I really don't know what to do anymore. I don't even know who to talk to! Why is this happening to me? Plz keep me in your duas I am a total mess tonight.
 
:bism:

:sl:

Hey, sis, it's gonna be okay. Not all days are all the same and so nor will the days-to-come be the same. There's gonna be a day in which you'll be feeling brighter, happier, and more yourself. Look forward to that day. :)

Try to look at the upside of every situation - and immerse yourself in positive thought and mindset. Prophet :saws: (peace and blessings be upon him) said, "A good attitude is a blessing." Give yourself the benefit of that blessing.

Participate in positive activities like exercising or reading or cooking or knitting or stitching or learning something beneficial. To that end, I have a recommendation for you, sis. Watch this beautiful YouTube video.

:wa:

I have had enough of everything! My trials, my family especially my sister. Every time I get in an argument she uses my problem against me which I have no control of.* It makes me very emotional because it's something I have dealt with the past 7-8 years and it has been one of the things that has made my life miserable and to her to use it against me just made me break down today. I am not the one to ever commit suicide but I feel like there's nothing left in this earth for me. Wallahi I just want Allah to take me already. I can't handle these trials anymore. You guys didn't get all the details only one sister on here knows but I'm sure you'd kill yourself too if you got my trials. I am just tried and I really don't know what to do anymore. I don't even know who to talk to! Why is this happening to me? Plz keep me in your duas I am a total mess tonight.
 
It's been 8yrs I thought maybe God would have mercy on me but nope! I have strieved and made so much duas but i am still in the same situation. Out of all the trials in this Dunya I just had to get this one eh? I am not being ungrateful but I am really starting to rethink a lot of things. I thought maybe my family would be understanding but all they do is use it against me. I have decided not to talk to them tonight and just stay in my room because they always seem to make things worse.
 
Your life will always be a trial, remember that. That is NOT to say that life may not be easy for you someday, but remember that even times of ease and happiness are tests of Allah to see if you will still remember Him every day. So just keep in mind that even when this trial is over, there will always be others, and to be grateful to Allah for them, for each trial you pass raises your position in Jannah.

*shakes head and smiles* I am not smiling at your situation, but just considering that I think sisters in general can be a trial. I know my sister was certainly a trial when we were growing up!

If you need an open ear to talk to or just a private place to vent, my inbox is always open. Just please keep in mind that I am on US Central time so right now it is 11:20 at night and I will be going to bed soon insha'Allah and may not respond immediately. Or if there is anything I could possibly do to help make your situation better, you need only to ask and I will do my best.
 
Your life will always be a trial, remember that. That is NOT to say that life may not be easy for you someday, but remember that even times of ease and happiness are tests of Allah to see if you will still remember Him every day. So just keep in mind that even when this trial is over, there will always be others, and to be grateful to Allah for them, for each trial you pass raises your position in Jannah.

*shakes head and smiles* I am not smiling at your situation, but just considering that I think sisters in general can be a trial. I know my sister was certainly a trial when we were growing up!

If you need an open ear to talk to or just a private place to vent, my inbox is always open. Just please keep in mind that I am on US Central time so right now it is 11:20 at night and I will be going to bed soon insha'Allah and may not respond immediately. Or if there is anything I could possibly do to help make your situation better, you need only to ask and I will do my best.
My trial is huge wallahi I can't handle it anymore;( I can't do anything I even had to quit my job! How does Allah want me to handle this?
 
Your life will always be a trial, remember that. That is NOT to say that life may not be easy for you someday, but remember that even times of ease and happiness are tests of Allah to see if you will still remember Him every day. So just keep in mind that even when this trial is over, there will always be others, and to be grateful to Allah for them, for each trial you pass raises your position in Jannah.

*shakes head and smiles* I am not smiling at your situation, but just considering that I think sisters in general can be a trial. I know my sister was certainly a trial when we were growing up!

If you need an open ear to talk to or just a private place to vent, my inbox is always open. Just please keep in mind that I am on US Central time so right now it is 11:20 at night and I will be going to bed soon insha'Allah and may not respond immediately. Or if there is anything I could possibly do to help make your situation better, you need only to ask and I will do my best.
Thx sis I'll inbox you maybe you'll understand.
 
Rabbana wala tuhammilna ma la taqata lana bihi wa'fu anna waghfir lana wairhamna anta mawlana fansurna 'alal-qawmil kafireen

Our Lord! Lay not on us a burden greater than we have strength to bear. Blot out our sins, and grant us forgiveness. Have mercy on us. Thou art our Protector; Help us against those who stand against faith
[2:286]

Rabbana la taj'alna fitnatal lil-qawmidh-Dhalimeen wa najjina bi-Rahmatika minal qawmil kafireen

Our Lord! Make us not a trial for those who practise oppression; And deliver us by Thy Mercy from those who reject (Thee)
[10:85-86]

 
Make istikhara to get guidance from Allah in a dream.

Look for GREEN and WHITE colors/objects, avoid RED.

https://islamqa.info/en/2217 Right before you sleep...
Allah has already given me a sign Alhmaduliah and I am forever thankful for that. I remember going doctor to doctor only for them to tell me everything is OK when it's clearly not. Alhmaduliah now I know what's wrong with me but it's too strong and I can't fight. I have done Ruqya but I always fail I'm just not strong enough:(
 
Sister, never despair for Allah Ta3aalaa is always there.

A Hadith comes to mind. Abu Hurairah رضي الله عنه narrated that Rasulullah صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
"من يرد الله به خيرا يصب منه"
"If Allah wants to do good to somebody, He afflicts him with trials"[Al-Bukhari]

In life there will be 'day and night'. The 'day' represents the good times and the 'night' represents times of difficulty. Like, the day never oversteps the night and vice versa, soo too will your difficulties never overstep its time.

It might seem as though to end your life is the only way out. Don't forget about the life of the Hereafter. Suicide leaves no chance or hope for Jannah. After all that you have experienced already, would it be wise to throw away all the reward that Allah has kept for you?

In a Hadith Narrated by Anas رضي الله عنه, it is mentioned that Rasulullah صلى الله عليه وسلم said:
"لا يتمنينّ أحدكم الموت لضُر أصابه، فإن كان
لابدّ فاعلاً فليقل: اللهم أحيني ما كانت الحياة خيراً لي، وتوفني إذا كانت الوفاة خيراً لي" متفق عليه
"One of you should not wish for death because of a difficulty that has affected him. If he must [say something], then let him say: Allah, give me life as long as life is good for me, and cause me to die when death is good for me.”
So instead of wishing for death, it would be better to make this du3aa.

With every difficulty and trial Allah is washing away your sins. Wouldn't it be better to meet Allah on a clean slate rather than meeting Allah and then having the burden of all your actions presented to you? Allah loves you! He is purifying you.

With regard to people insulting you for that which you have no control over-it hurts. It hurts so much. People would do it to me too. After so many years I learned to say just one statement: "Are you insulting The Creator or The Creator's creation?"
Saying this just leaves them speechless!

May Allah ease your difficulties آمين Recite and try to understand Suratul Inshiraa7/Ash Shar7: "With every difficulty is ease". You will gain so much of comfort from this Surah. It is amazing .

Don't forget that Allah loves you[emoji181]
 
Assalamualaikum dear sister,

Please don't worry whatever problem you are facing. I know it's easier said than done but these trying times test your faith if it has been shaken or firm. All of us go through trials and remember this tough time doesent last but tough people do. Never despair from the mercy of Allah the most merciful. He blesses the soul who asks for His mercy which is endless.

True that in your situation especially when your facing a problem, your family should stand by you sister. It can be tough to be criticised at such trying times where all you ask for is understanding. Just keep your faith and you can inbox me sister for sharing. My prayers are for you.
 
May Allah swt ease all of your hardships and reward you many times over for your sabr.

I can't even begin to understand what you must be going through, but I know that when going through a tough patch in life sometimes it can be difficult to see that there will be an end to it one day soon, and you feel your problems are overwhelming you. You have probably heard this so many times, but I am going to say it again, Allah swt is bigger than your problems, if anyone can bring you relief it is Him, and, He *will* give you relief one day. SubhanAllah, you have managed this with a lot of sabr and strength for eight years, that's truly commendable, and the reward will be with Allah swt.

There's this ayat in the Qur'an which is quoted a lot:

Verily, with every hardship comes ease! - 94:6

It's not 'after' hardship comes ease, it's 'with' hardship comes ease. So within the hardship there is ease, a hidden blessing somewhere. Maybe now it's hard to see, but it may be in years to come you can look back and see it inshaAllah.

And, there's also this lovely hadith which has given me so much comfort when I've sorely needed it.

If Allah intends good for someone, then He afflicts him with trials.
Source: Sahih Bukhari 5321, Grade: Sahih

And about sisters, especially younger ones, they can be difficult at times, even inconsiderate with what they say. But she does love you, if she is young then it may take her some years before she can admit it.
You'll be in my duas, x
 
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Greetings and peace be with you Dreamchaser;

I have had enough of everything! My trials, my family especially my sister. Every time I get in an argument she uses my problem against me which I have no control of.*

I have had similar problems with my wife for the last 31 years, I have come to understand that I can never win arguments with her,but we need to keep striving to make up. Fight all battles with kindness, forgive always, pray for her, that she to will find salvation.

In the spirit of never giving up hope,

Eric
 
I have had enough of everything! My trials, my family especially my sister. Every time I get in an argument she uses my problem against me which I have no control of.* It makes me very emotional because it's something I have dealt with the past 7-8 years and it has been one of the things that has made my life miserable and to her to use it against me just made me break down today. I am not the one to ever commit suicide but I feel like there's nothing left in this earth for me. Wallahi I just want Allah to take me already. I can't handle these trials anymore. You guys didn't get all the details only one sister on here knows but I'm sure you'd kill yourself too if you got my trials. I am just tried and I really don't know what to do anymore. I don't even know who to talk to! Why is this happening to me? Plz keep me in your duas I am a total mess tonight.








-The Messenger of Allaah, sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam, said:
“There is no-one who is afflicted by distress and grief, and says:
‘Allaahumma inni ‘abduka ibn ‘abdika ibn amatika naasyati bi yadika, maadhin fiyya hukmuka,
‘adlun fiyya qadhaa’uka. As’aluka bi kulli ismin huwa laka sammayta bihi nafsaka aw anzaltahu
fi kitaabika aw ‘allamtahu ahadan min khalqika aw ista’tharta bihi fi ‘ilmil-ghaybi ‘indaka
an taj’al al-Qur’aana rabee’a qalbi wa noor sadri wa jalaa’ huzni wa thihaab hammi
[O Allaah, I am Your slave, son of Your slave, son of Your female slave; my forelock is
in Your hand, Your command over me is forever executed and Your decree over me is just.
I ask You by every name belonging to You which You have named Yourself with, or revealed
in Your Book, or You taught to any of Your creation, or You have preserved in the knowledge
of the Unseen with You, that You make the Qur’aan the life of my heart and the light of my breast,
and a departure for my sorrow and a release for my anxiety],’ but Allaah will take away his distress
and grief, and replace it with joy.”


He was asked: “O Messenger of Allaah, should we learn this?” He said: “Of course; everyone who hears it
should learn it.”
 
I have had enough of everything!

If you think that way then it is time to change your life. Medicines can ease your problem for a period but you can achieve the real healing with a radical change in your life. If your family bothers you leave them.
 
My trial is huge wallahi I can't handle it anymore;( I can't do anything I even had to quit my job! How does Allah want me to handle this?

:salam:

Sis, maybe Allah :swt: wants you to turn to Him more. He :swt: wants you to see the futility of this world. He :swt: wants you to ask Him :swt: more, and perhaps this is the only way.

Remember, this test is to HELP YOU become better. On the day of Judgment EVERYONE will only care about themselves, not out of arrogance but out of fear, and because that day is terrifying.

This may be a good time to reconnect with Allah :swt:. Think about it, why would Allah :swt: have your parents argue with you on deen *(AFAIK) correct me if I'm wrong.

He :swt: made you quit your Job, perhaps Allah wants you to get to a higher level, Cause Allah :swt: has better for you than this world. Try to think of positive ways to deal with this.

Take me, I've went through a trial for 2 months! almost 3. It made me realise the futility of this world and all within it and the treasure of Imaan. Wallah there is nothing better and more invaluable in this world and of what Allah :swt: gave us, of which is Imaan. Knowledge of Allah, belief in Him, His books. I am still struggling too, and if you asked me, I'd ask Allah to give me your trial in replacement for mine.

But ya know, every trial is for our best, to make us more firm. Once you UNDERSTAND the trial once you know why, etc. the trial will vaporize (for lack of a better word).

Forgive me for not helping..

may Allah :swt: forgive all of us. Ameen.

And Allah :swt: knows best.
 
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:sl:

We were born to be tested by Allah SWT. Some times these trials bring out the best of us and it solidifies our position in Jannah Insha'Allah. You're not the only one who goes from through trials. I obviously have no clue what you're going through, But know this... This world isn't meant to be a walk in the park. GETTING TO JANNAH isn't meant to be a walk in the park:

لَنَبْلُوَنَّكُم بِشَيْءٍ مِّنَ الْخَوْفِ وَالْجُوعِ وَنَقْصٍ مِّنَ الْأَمْوَالِ وَالْأَنفُسِ وَالثَّمَرَاتِ ۗ وَبَشِّرِ الصَّابِرِينَ
"And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, but give good tidings to the patient,"

It was narrated from Abu Hurairah that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said:
This world is a prison for the believer and a paradise for the disbeliever.’”
[Grade: Sahih (Darussalam), Sunan Ibn Majah]

It's tough as you can see because Allah SWT Himself has said that we will be tested, But as for those who are patient and keep the faith in Allah SWT, those are the ones who are successful and will be one step closer to Jannah Insha'Allah.
Have a read at this:

It was narrated from Mus’ab bin Sa’d that his father, Sa’d bin Abu Waqqas, said:
“I said: ‘O Messenger of Allah, which people are most severely tested?’ He said: ‘The Prophets, then the next best and the next best. A person is tested according to his religious commitment. If he is steadfast in his religious commitment, he will be tested more severely, and if he is frail in his religious commitment, his test will be according to his commitment. Trials will continue to afflict a person until they leave him walking on the earth with no sin on him.’
[Grade: Hasan (Darussalam), Sunan Ibn Majah 4023]

Allah SWT tests his best servants, and for those who remain steadfast and patient will have his sins wiped off.

Like I said, it's not easy this world, But I always do this when I'm faced with hardships:
Look at those who aren't as blessed as you are.
- Alhamdulillah you probably live in a house with food on the table at breakfast, lunch, tea, dinner and even supper (If you're into that stuff). Isn't this not a great blessing from Allah SWT? There are some poor souls out there who can't even get one slice of bread let alone at least 1 meal during the day. There's people out there who don't even have a roof over their head and would love to be in a position like yourself regardless of there other trials.
- There's people out there living in oppressed areas like Sham and Kashmir who are being massacred left right and centre and who have perhaps lost loved ones very close to them, But Alhamdulillah you probably live in a completely different country in peace.

There's so much to thank Allah SWT for, from the food you get on your table to the clothes you were to the bed you sleep in at night. Just remember that there are some who are having it MUCH MUCH worse than you are, So isn't that in itself something to thank Allah SWT for? This hadith sums it up best:

Abu Hurairah narrated that the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) said:
“Look at those who are beneath you and do not look at those who are above you, for it is more suitable that you should not consider as less the blessing of Allah.
[Grade: Sahih (Darussalam), Sunan Ibn Majah]

Alhamdulillah. So the bottom line is... Be thankful! Because there's some who are being tested even more severely. This hardship could bring you even more closer to Allah SWT, So please keep patient and do not think about suicide, Because it's just a one way ticket to hell. Easier said than done of course.

There's this one really quoted verse of the Quran which is quite short, But really powerful:

إِنَّ مَعَ الْعُسْرِ يُسْرًا
"Indeed, with hardship [will be] ease."

Not too long ago, when I was around 12 there was a very short period within my life which really changed my entire mindset regarding the World. Prior to this trial, I wasn't really practising from a young age despite the fact my parents were religious and expected me to be too. Anyway I won't go into too much detail, But this trial really hit me hard and I genuinely hated life at that point. Then I decided to return back to Allah SWT and became more practising. I begged Allah SWT to ease my situation and within a few weeks things got so much better. From that day I have tried my best to incorporate Islam into my life even more and dare I say I'm actually happy that Allah SWT put me through that trial. Why you may ask? Because if it wasn't for that trial, I would probably still just be a "Muslim by name", I would never have found out more about this perfect religion and I would never have been more closer to Allah SWT.
My previous situation reminds me of this hadith:

Abu Huraira reported: The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said, “If Allah intends good for someone, then he afflicts him with trials.
Reference - Sahih Bukhari 5321

I urge you to read this dua and I pray that you are given ease:

اللَّهُمَّ إِنِّي أَعُوذُ بِكَ مِنْ الْهَمِّ وَالْحُزْنِ وَالْعَجْزِ وَالْكَسَلِ وَالْبُخْلِ وَالْجُبْنِ وَضَلَعِ الدَّيْنِ وَغَلَبَةِ الرِّجَالِ
Anas b. Malik said:
I used to serve the Prophet (ﷺ) and often hear him say: "O Allah, I seek refuge in You from grief and anxiety, from the hardships of debt, and from being overpowered by men."
Grade: Sahih (Al-Albani)
Sunan Abi Dawud 1541

Keep the faith and Insha'Allah things will get better.

May Allah SWT ease your hardships, Ameen.
 
Sibling rivalry, jibes and from just knowing you so well can be the most cruel of all people.

You said the right word. "Tired". More than exasperated. Past being at your wits' end. What else? You lose hope and give up.

After 8 years you have finally 'had' it with life!

Somehow, it is similar to me like those wanting to leave islam on count of others...

It is your life. Take hold of it. AllahuAkhbar.


:peace:
 
Every time you give up, give up to Allah, the Creator and Master of the universe.
Then you'll have won.
 
What about leaving the whole situation to Allah :swt: for a change? Obv Allah is the caretaker, but what about you relax, take the tests, and let Allah deal with it?

you do what you can, if they get mad with you, take it as a test from Allah. There is no use bickering and fighting, it just makes it more bitter. Do what Allah obligated you to do, do your best, but do not overburden yourself, do what YOU can do, for verily Allah :swt: never burdens a soul beyond their capacity, nor is Allah, ever, to His :swt: creation an oppressor.

Let Allah take care of the rest. Maybe this is an opportunity for you to learn what relying on Allah means. we all need to learn that, on paper it may be eas, in theory it may be easy to rely on Allah. But practically, do we even know how? even if we know, do we practically rely on Allah as we should?

Take this as a mission:

Mission: Rely on Allah.
Status: In progress.

Instructions: Do your best, let Allah do the rest. Do not focus on destination, but focus on progress. Take a deep breath, let yourself breathe. Take your time to ponder and relax and just observe your own existence.

And Allah :swt: knows best.
 
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