I have a huge dilemma.

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:sl:
innocent said:
My husband knows someone who drinks and gives whisky to his 8 month old baby regularly. I have been very worried since he told me today. The father of this baby is a muslim and he also beats his wife. I have asked my husband to give me his details so that I can report him but my husband says just leave them be. I know I can get him to give me the details eventually but what I'm worried about is the repercussions on my family. From what my husband has told me this guy is the sort who takes revenge. My husband is the only one who knows he gives the baby alcohol so if we report him he will know its us. I know I cant just sit back and relax knowing what is going on but how shoul go about it. Any advice will be appreciated.
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wow...you HAVE to do something sis.
but i advise to try see a muslin social worker about this first...cos that way they understand how to deal with a family break up alot better...i would think so anyway...
 
:sl: To the poster. Please let us know what happened??? What did you do and do you know what the outcome was......................:w:
 
if you live in the UK there are many services out there which are confidential and it's just a call away, i'm sure thats not the only problem that family seems to have so the chances of him knowing its your husband that reported these issue is very little, and with the services available today your family will get help too if you have any worries about the consequences that might happen.
call these services and ask for advice available to in incase your family gets into trouble.

also think fo this child, you could help to save their life and the mothers, if you sit and watch it's selfish of you and you should help in anyway you can but make sure you know all the information you need.
 
:sl: I agree with green shoes as a Muslim and member of the community it is your responsibility to make sure that this baby and mother are ok.....

If you get in touch with social services they are at discretion and will not say who called you can also phone anonymously.....

Also Heath Visitors are known to regularly visit a newborn child, so this would not be anything abnormal for them to do. However if they are tipped off and made aware that there might be a problem, they can enter the house unsuspiciously and investigate................:w::peace:
Green_shoes said:
if you live in the UK there are many services out there which are confidential and it's just a call away, i'm sure thats not the only problem that family seems to have so the chances of him knowing its your husband that reported these issue is very little, and with the services available today your family will get help too if you have any worries about the consequences that might happen.
call these services and ask for advice available to in incase your family gets into trouble.

also think fo this child, you could help to save their life and the mothers, if you sit and watch it's selfish of you and you should help in anyway you can but make sure you know all the information you need.
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salaam

I am no scholar no a professional councillor, but my sincere advice is this:

Firstly, this person may have been exaggerating when he said these things to your husband. If your husband actually saw him giving alcohol to a baby, then I would encourage you to report him to the police.
Do not worry about the repercussions. Maybe report him to the police anonymous line on 0800 555 111.
If it turns out the guy was just making up the story for some random reason, may be not get the police involved?
Instead look at these points below (carry on reading even if it is the case that you do report him)

Secondly, make dua for him and the family. The over looked solution to every problem.

Thirdly, because you are a sister, help his wife. Don't try and force her into not loving her husband, but talk to her, give her support and by the way, don't try to seem daunting, like "What does he do?" but say something like "I thought my husband was going to hit me last night, don't you hate that feeling" let it be a leading question, get her to open up.
Also, if she doesn't tell you, do not worry! Give the sister a book or a talk "how to win the heart of your husband". Also, this lady may not pray, if it turns out that he was actually not giving alcohol to the baby and he was trying to act hard or something, you might want to not report this to the police, and instead help his wife come closer to Allah and through Allah win the heart of her husband and guidance.

Fourthly, get your local mosque to help. Now this does depend on what kind of mosque you have near you...some are useless. If you do have a good one, it doesn't matter which sect they belong to, seek help and advise.

Fifthly, if the issue becomes SERIOUS and they take the baby away from them, try to foster the child yourself, or ask somebody good to do that.

Hope that helps,

Muslim - from UmmahViews.com
 
innocent said:
Yes I am in UK. I have contacted social services anonymously by email and asked their advice. I need to give them names and addresses which I will try and get from hubby.
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Did you give them the needed details? What did they say or what has happened so far?
 
innocent said:
My husband knows someone who drinks and gives whisky to his 8 month old baby regularly. I have been very worried since he told me today. The father of this baby is a muslim and he also beats his wife. I have asked my husband to give me his details so that I can report him but my husband says just leave them be. I know I can get him to give me the details eventually but what I'm worried about is the repercussions on my family. From what my husband has told me this guy is the sort who takes revenge. My husband is the only one who knows he gives the baby alcohol so if we report him he will know its us. I know I cant just sit back and relax knowing what is going on but how shoul go about it. Any advice will be appreciated.
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Enjoin the good and forbid the evil, help this family in their time of need and do not abandon them, and Allah will help you in a time when you are most in need.

The Prophet, sallallahu 'alayhi wasallam, said:

"Whosoever relieves from a believer some grief pertaining to this world, Allah will relieve from him some grief pertaining to the Hereafter. Whosoever alleviates the difficulties of a needy person who cannot pay his debt, Allah will alleviate his difficulties in both this world and the Hereafter. Whosoever conceals the faults of a Muslim, Allah will conceal his faults in this world and the Hereafter. Allah will aid a servant (of His) so long as the servant aids his brother. Whosoever follows a path to seek knowledge therein, Allah will make easy for him a path to Paradise. No people gather together in one of the houses of Allah, reciting the Book of Allah and studying it among themselves, except that tranquility descends upon them, mercy covers them, the angels surround them, and Allah makes mention of them amongst those who are in His presence. Whosoever is slowed down by his deeds will not be hastened forward by his lineage."

[Sahih Muslim]
 
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:salamext:
Ya Allah.How much suffering the poor baby is enduring through. All I can say is to tell that women to run away with the baby somewhere other then this while I think of something else.
 
:salamext:
Ya Allah.How much suffering the poor baby is enduring through. All I can say is to tell that women to run away with the baby somewhere other then this while I think of something else.
 
:sl: Bless you little one. I imagine that it would be quite difficult for the mother to run away with a small child...........

We do not know the full context of the story, this is why i have suggessted that the Health Visitors are alerted anonymously, so that they can pay a visit and investigate without any suspicious cause or upset to any party involved. This is a very serious and delicate matter and must be handled carefully as the welfare of both the child and it's mother are at stake...............

:cry: very sad situation...........:w:
Yanal said:
:salamext:
Ya Allah.How much suffering the poor baby is enduring through. All I can say is to tell that women to run away with the baby somewhere other then this while I think of something else.
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wow...im just lost for words!!! this is just awful.....I would report him! Its not worth thinking what cud happen to this innocent child if this continues......you will have to do someting.....the longer you leave it the worse it will get.
 
While I'm not in any way going to defend this guy - wife beating? Sheer scum. - I doubt he's actually making the baby drink whisky. I don't think that would be possible and would very quickly make the baby seriously sick. What I think is more likely is that he perhaps puts whisky on the baby's dummy to make it sleep - still not exactly good parenting.
 

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