I just converted to muslim breh

[swaglam]

so i woz in prison for bare long breh, found some books on the qur'an, studied it. ****, never thought id be in this religion ting, but standard, im'ma be going to heaven inshallah, straight to the top breh!

anyways, i need some help on some issues that i found confusing, bare hard to read, ive only done school for like till 12 years, then i bounced breh.

1. i love pork breh, but i stopped eating it, coz i heard dat meat aint right son. so woteva, jew no! i miss them, any loopholes or ways around this glitch breh?

2. i met this honey in my prison pen pal programme, she woz hot, mami woz right. anyways, she like christian, and she wanna stay christian, i wanted to slap da taste out of her mouth but nah imma calm down now, the psychologist woz like u too hard-headed, and u dont listen, i got problems with authority breh. but yo, can i marry this chick or wot???

3. so i pray 5 times a day, but i missed like 25 years coz i woz still a christian, do i make this up or do i gain credit or wot b ? help me out breh

5. so anyways, im livin in a cool council house, but check this, i rolled up to the unemployment office and some dude started actin bare hot, like he woz afraid and wanted to beef, i airrrrred him that moment, but yo , i think he bare racist. do i have the right to murk this dude?? :hiding:

4. so i jsut came through my first eid as a muslim breh, i loved it, made me feel good and fresh, like i could start my life over again. how can i repay allah for alll the good things that have happened to me recently? life is going right for the first time breh

but yeh yo, salamalakum my brothers, hope yall good and staying on the right path, im trying ha haaaaaa

help me out though

thanks, peace out yo

 

[syilla]

mabrook.......... akhee

love your posts.

InshaAllah some one will help you with the questions

 

[Snowflake]

1. i love pork breh, but i stopped eating it, coz i heard dat meat aint right son. so woteva, jew no! i miss them, any loopholes or ways around this glitch breh?

Assalamu alaykum brother Swaglam,

Firstly welcome to your new family and Islam. We pray Allah, Exalted be He, makes your journey easy for you and increases you in multitudes in all which He loves and turns you away from which He hates. My brother pork is prohibited except when there is nothing else to eat and you face dying from starvation. In that case you will be rewarded for eating it. As you have accpeted the concession Allah allowed and did what you could to save your life. Even then you cannot eat your fill, but enough to sustain life. For all other times it is strictly prohibited. Believe me bro, once you give up something, it is only a short matter of time that you stop craving it. I was crazy for red meat, but now only eat it rarely. You will also be rewarded for leaving something for the sake of Allah. But the reward doesn't end here. By the grace of Allah in the next life you will be rewarded with bounties from Allah's treasures you can't imagine. Ask Allah to make all maters easy for you bro.

2. i met this honey in my prison pen pal programme, she woz hot, mami woz right. anyways, she like christian, and she wanna stay christian, i wanted to slap da taste out of her mouth but nah imma calm down now, the psychologist woz like u too hard-headed, and u dont listen, i got problems with authority breh. but yo, can i marry this chick or wot??

Islam recommends marrying a woman for her piety. Of course you are allowed to be attracted to her. But piety must be there (in both spouses) to ensure the necessary elements to create a well balanced and happy environment for the couple as well as their offspring and as a result for the society in general. A muslim man may only marry a Christian/Jewish woman if she is chaste. And their children are raised as muslims.

3. so i pray 5 times a day, but i missed like 25 years coz i woz still a christian, do i make this up or do i gain credit or wot b ? help me out breh

You do not have to make up for past prayers. But you must strive to pray regularly on time now that you are muslim.

5. so anyways, im livin in a cool council house, but check this, i rolled up to the unemployment office and some dude started actin bare hot, like he woz afraid and wanted to beef, i airrrrred him that moment, but yo , i think he bare racist. do i have the right to murk this dude??

All praise to Allah you have a nice home. We must always thank Allah for His blessings. Allah tests man in various ways. We must always ensure we do not displease him with our ungratefulness. I pray you find a good job soon, Allah willing. You can also go back to college (adult Education) to learn new employment skills. Don't forget to make dua for Allah to assist you in your efforts.

4. so i jsut came through my first eid as a muslim breh, i loved it, made me feel good and fresh, like i could start my life over again. how can i repay allah for alll the good things that have happened to me recently? life is going right for the first time breh

MashaAllah. That's wonderful to hear bro. I hope you stay with us and increase your knowledge of this beautiful way of life. WE will be happy to ask any questions you wish to ask. May Allah bless you and keep you on the right Path. Ameen.



:wa:

 

[Ummu Sufyaan]

welcome to Islam and welcome to the Forums...
what does "breh" mean :embarrass

1. i love pork breh, but i stopped eating it, coz i heard dat meat aint right son. so woteva, jew no! i miss them, any loopholes or ways around this glitch breh?

no. we have to avoid sin and do as much good as we can.
dont worry, whatever you give up for the sake of allah, you get it replaced with something better :shade:

2. i met this honey in my prison pen pal programme, she woz hot, mami woz right. anyways, she like christian, and she wanna stay christian, i wanted to slap da taste out of her mouth but nah imma calm down now, the psychologist woz like u too hard-headed, and u dont listen, i got problems with authority breh. but yo, can i marry this chick or wot???

yes you can marry a christian. read this
and this


just a piece of advice, if you do marry her, please remain clam. women dont like men who have a short fuse eace: as im sure men dont like women with a short fuse. eace:

if she doesn't want to convert, you can still marry her. just preach to her kindly and gently if you want her to become Muslim (not to say that that will guarantee her becoming Muslim).

3. so i pray 5 times a day, but i missed like 25 years coz i woz still a christian, do i make this up or do i gain credit or wot b ? help me out breh

no, you dont have to make them up. read this

5. so anyways, im livin in a cool council house, but check this, i rolled up to the unemployment office and some dude started actin bare hot, like he woz afraid and wanted to beef, i airrrrred him that moment, but yo , i think he bare racist. do i have the right to murk this dude??

murk? meaning beat up? just ignore him he only makes himself look bad. you'll run into idiots everywhere, just ignore them.

4. so i jsut came through my first eid as a muslim breh, i loved it, made me feel good and fresh, like i could start my life over again. how can i repay allah for alll the good things that have happened to me recently? life is going right for the first time breh

good question...pity i dont know

 

[aamirsaab]

This has to be the most hilarious introduction on LI.

Nuff respect brah.

 

[zakirs]

Salaam bro ..

great to see your post.. one of the funniest i have seen in long time ..

yeah what does breh mean..

1. i love pork breh, but i stopped eating it, coz i heard dat meat aint right son. so woteva, jew no! i miss them, any loopholes or ways around this glitch breh?

Eat chicken

2. i met this honey in my prison pen pal programme, she woz hot, mami woz right. anyways, she like christian, and she wanna stay christian, i wanted to slap da taste out of her mouth but nah imma calm down now, the psychologist woz like u too hard-headed, and u dont listen, i got problems with authority breh. but yo, can i marry this chick or wot???

Marry whom you think is just, pious .. of course you need to like her too but just don't marry because she is beautiful . Prefer marrying a muslim girl , if you need help finding one go to a mosque and ask imam to help you out.(sorry if i misunderstood your post)

5. so anyways, im livin in a cool council house, but check this, i rolled up to the unemployment office and some dude started actin bare hot, like he woz afraid and wanted to beef, i airrrrred him that moment, but yo , i think he bare racist. do i have the right to murk this dude??

Fight back only in self defence.If he is just shouting at you ignore him.

4. so i jsut came through my first eid as a muslim breh, i loved it, made me feel good and fresh, like i could start my life over again. how can i repay allah for alll the good things that have happened to me recently? life is going right for the first time breh

ask yourselves bro . May be do some charity work to make other's lives better too ?

 

[Muhseen]

Welcome to Islam. I wish you all the best.

 

[tresbien]

God’s mercy is intimately close to everyone of us, awaiting to embrace when we are ready. Islam recognizes human propensity to sin, for God has created man weak. The Prophet stated:

“All the children of Adam constantly err…”

At the same time, God lets us know He forgives sins. Continuing the same hadeeth:

“…but the best of those who constantly err are those who constantly repent.” (Al-Tirmidhi, Ibn Majah, Ahmad, Hakim)

God says:

“Say, ‘O My servants, who have transgressed against their souls! Despair not of the Mercy of God: for God forgives all sins, for He is Oft-Forgiving, Most-Merciful.’” (Quran 39:53)

Muhammad, the Prophet of Mercy, was charged to convey the good news to all people:

“Tell My servants that I am indeed the Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful.” (Quran 15:49)

Repentance attracts Divine Mercy:

“…Why do you not, rather, ask God to forgive you your sins, so that you might be graced with His mercy?” (Quran 27:46)

“…God’s mercy is ever near unto the doers of good!” (Quran 7:56)

Since ancient times, God’s saving mercy has rescued the faithful from pending doom:

“And so, when Our judgment came to pass, by Our mercy We saved Hud and those who shared his faith….” (Quran 11:58)

“And so, when Our judgment came to pass, by Our mercy We saved Shu’ayb and those who shared his faith….” (Quran 11:94)

 

[tresbien]

u are new born all u past sins have been erased.Moreover, u do not need to make up for missed paryers since u were non muslims.but as u are muslim.
he Sharia'h accommodates the new Muslim who is unfamiliar with the prayer and/or the Arabic language by loosening some of the requirements for a valid prayer in his or her case until he or she can learn (of course, they are responsible for learning what is required in a reasonable amount of time). However, he or she must still perform the basic fundamentals of the prayer even during this early period.

it worthy to mention that prayers that were not performed at all during the initial period after converting to Islam must be made .

Ya Allah please bestow your mercy upon MY BROTHER and, forgive HIM keep HIM patient, thankful and strong. Grant HIM the ability to BE pleased with what Allah has decreed. Keep HIS heart steadfast upon Your deen. Ya Allah purify HIS heart and make this a time to make HIM closer to Allah. Ya Allah release HIM from the hands of the SATAN AND WRONGDOERS. Grant HIM happiness after HIS sorrow. Protect him and do not burden him with more than what he can bear. Keep his eeman strong. Ya Allah,send peace and blessings upon Your prophet, his family, companions and those who follow them. Allahumma Ameen Allahumma Ameen Allahumma Ameen.
pls visit
www.islamqa.com
u wiill find all answers of u question.

 

[aadil77]

and welcome bruv, your post made me laugh loud

good on you bruv for trying hard, inshAllah things will be going good

keep us posted on any issues

btw where u from? i hav to know

 

[swaglam]

:statisfie

**** brehs, so many replies, thanks so much for da support yall, im really on this hard and it made me smile, made me forget about lifes problems yo, good to know there sum decent brothers out thurr looking out for man, even on dis online ting, **** breh, thanks!

also, breh is slang for bro, breh.

im in feltham at the mo, probation is loooooonnnnnggg. im originally from tajikistan, standard.

its gonna take me a lonnnnng time to understand some of yall posts, but i got my work ethic, imma keep it 100 all day breh.

will let yall kno if i have any other problems, or need klarification on some of the, passagge.s

may allah grant you all a place in paradise for helping a fellow breh out.

 

[Snowflake]

You're most welcome breh ;D

You're in our duaas. may Allah make probation easy for you. Ameen

 

[Masuma]

First of all Bwhahaha! Very funny!

so i woz in prison for bare long breh,

Oh my! Honestly, what did you do?

2. i met this honey in my prison pen pal programme, she woz hot, mami woz right. anyways, she like christian, and she wanna stay christian, i wanted to slap da taste out of her mouth but nah imma calm down now, the psychologist woz like u too hard-headed, and u dont listen, i got problems with authority breh. but yo, can i marry this chick or wot???

There is one post which explains this that "yup! you can marry a chaste woman." (Details up there.)

Your questions have been answered mashAllah! But just wanted to share one experience with you. There is one Christian woman who came on one of the anti-Islamic forum seeking advice that she is a Christian but her husband a Muslim. Now they are having trouble with the religion of their children. She wants her children to be Christians but her husband wants them to be Muslims! So that has become a very complicated situation for them.

If you want to marry this hot chick, and if she is chaste as well (and what did you say, hot? A girl with full body covered won't appear hot to any body so is she like displaying her beauty etc?) so the choice is yours. But also do some future planning. What religion should your children be following? Children are always closer to their mother more than father, so I think that Christianity might have more influence on them. You'll be like busy working in your office and at your home, your children might be having Trinity lessons! So think first before taking any step!

I still advice you that a Muslim chick would be a better choice. You'll not later have to regret. Just look around you and you will see many beautiful Muslimahs, (covered fully that you won't be able to see their beauty, some showing their eyes only!) :giggling: Beeheehe! But still thats not a problem!

And don't you prefer a wife who covers herself fully and displays her beauty only to you and that your friends or strangers may never be able to lust after her beauty? I have seen many males getting angry with their wives for showing off their beauty .

but yeh yo, salamalakum my brothers, hope yall good and staying on the right path, i'm trying ha haaaaaa

And you better be!


Pleajjj?:statisfie

And don't end up in prison again!;D (M thinking of the poor dude you are planning to have your hands on and with just look! with how much boldness you're asking advice from your Muslim bros!)

Always try to be calm and patient for Allah love those who are patient. Try to control your anger so that you become a brave man in a real sense.

May Allah bless you!

Allahafiz!eace:

 

[GuestFellow]

Asslamu Aliakum.

I hope you have a nice stay brother.

Keep out of trouble. ,____,

 

[Danah]

Interesting introduction, Congratulation and Welcome to Islam *breh* "learn new word" ^_^

I was pondering over your post. Look at how this life going on....you were in prison for some reason, and that place lead you to come to Islam......seriously, this life is full of tests.

 

[Cabdullahi]

Welcome and baaaahhh!


kidding mate keep it real brehtherin!

 

[Grofica]

This has to be the most hilarious introduction on LI.

Nuff respect brah.

:statisfie he he he he agreed! :statisfie

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

welcome to islam bro


hope you keep rising to the top n enter jannah like you intended

 

[GuestFellow]

1. i love pork breh, but i stopped eating it, coz i heard dat meat aint right son. so woteva, jew no! i miss them, any loopholes or ways around this glitch breh?

Ah well you could always find something else to eat... ._. Find something to eat that tastes better than pork!

2. i met this honey in my prison pen pal programme, she woz hot, mami woz right. anyways, she like christian, and she wanna stay christian, i wanted to slap da taste out of her mouth but nah imma calm down now, the psychologist woz like u too hard-headed, and u dont listen, i got problems with authority breh. but yo, can i marry this chick or wot???

Okay dating in Islam is forbidden. Not allowed. You can marry a Christian however...it is not encouraged. It would be seen more of a burden since you have to raise your children to be Muslims but your wife might want to raise them as Christians. So it is better to marry a Muslim women.

3. so i pray 5 times a day, but i missed like 25 years coz i woz still a christian, do i make this up or do i gain credit or wot b ? help me out breh

I think it is impossible to make up for 25 years of missed prayers. Start fresh and try your best not to miss prayers.

5. so anyways, im livin in a cool council house, but check this, i rolled up to the unemployment office and some dude started actin bare hot, like he woz afraid and wanted to beef, i airrrrred him that moment, but yo , i think he bare racist. do i have the right to murk this dude?? :hiding:

Ah I would ignore him.

4. so i jsut came through my first eid as a muslim breh, i loved it, made me feel good and fresh, like i could start my life over again. how can i repay allah for alll the good things that have happened to me recently? life is going right for the first time breh

As long as you continue to pray, give money to charity, follow the laws of the Quran, avoid committing sins and Allah will surely be pleased.

Hope this helps.

 

['Abd-al Latif]

This has to be the most hilarious introduction on LI.

Nuff respect brah.

:wasalamex

I second that!