Assalamu Alaikum...well, im from Sri Lanka, and I don't know if this is the same all over my country, but yeah, there are women doctors and teachers all over Sri Lanka, but not many of us get a chance like that, especially Muslim women.
the main reason we don't get to acquire higher education, that is, joining universities or going abroad is because our parents don't like sending us to universities and schools where girls and boys are mixed...yes, even im not happy with joining a mixed school, but I just NEED to continue with my higher education!
and they also object to the idea of Muslim girls going abroad alone.
another thing is, doing higherstudies takes time, and here, our families think by doing so, one would become too old to marry... It's usually 18, 19 or 20 which they think are the right ages for marriage, (or maybe they think 20 is also too old for marriage....)
and my dad heard from a doctor himself that if the girl is too educated, it is hard to find husbands for her....see? they always think of marriage!!! but i feel hopeless when listening to them object to all my ideas of getting higher education. or maybe my dad would allow me to do some courses and all but don't think he'll ever let me do a job, my dream job...
Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, my sister jazakallah for your question. Firstly sister one has to understand where your parents are coming from because nowadays Universities are places of great fitna as i have seen for myself because of the fact that the intermingling of the sexes is actually promoted by these educational establishments. Many a time women in particular get freedom and freedome they never had before they came into university and when they experience this frredom they go wild in their passions.
Even if one has no intention of getting into fitna because of the fact that one is in a mixed environment and will be likely to meet all kinds of people and fall into great levels of temptation aswell as involve themselves in this bad environment then eventually a person may give way and get into fitna without even realising it.
Shaythan does things gradually and in stages and trust me even the greatest have fallen so going into these environments and in your case you would have to live in this kind of environment then surely it is a great risk to your imaan and it is understandable why any Muslim parent would have their reservations about sending their daughter to these kinds of establishments.
Many a time Muslim parents have trusted their daughters to go to university alone in another locality and they have ended up doing the worst evils as i myself have seen and heard.
Im not saying that everyone would fall for this but what i am saying is that even people who thought they would'nt end up falling into evil and fitna because of the fact that they are actually living in that sort of environment and eventually if that person is surrunded with that environment for so long then something will give way.
Studying medicine by a woman is fard kifayah (collective duty). So, it is allowed for women to study medicine, especially in this age because we need a lot of professional female doctors in many fields. But there has to be a balance between the family commitment and the study, especially when we know that the woman’s role in the family is more necessary.
Also studying in mixed envrionments as ive mentioned is very risky even if woman observes the rules of Shari `ah and should one risk their own imaan for the sake of a worldly career?
Also you should realise that a Muslim women cannot travel abroad or upto 48 miles alone without a mahram as we all know travelling alone is dangerous enough for a man let alone a women especially in non Muslim countries. Also many scholars say that because of the present circumstances of society with regards to how dangerous it has become that a women should not travel alone at all.
It would be another matter if you were able to commute everyday from your educational establishment to your home if it were a short distance. But if it was far away then it would not be right for you to travel that far alone and live on your own without a mahram. I myself have known many cases of women who live out alone to study who get stalked and all sorts by men and predators.
One should marry as soon as possible and if you were to do medicine then it would take upto 9 years for you to be a fully qualified GP.
That is a long time not to be married sister can a person juggle home life aswell as studying medicine which is so demanding?
It is going to be unrealistic and difficult for you to pursue this career sister and i would advise you to make isthikhara in regards to this issue.
Also know that many of us have dreams and ambitions but they are not always possible and realistic. In your case can you imagine how many people have dreamed to become doctors? But how many actually become one?
Everyones fate is different and Allah knows your intention and Allah has established that the women is the leader of the household and household affairs and men are the breadwinners and this is also the natural role of a man and woman because of the fact that a women is nurturing and caring so she takes care of the family and household affairs and the man is created physically stronger so he takes care of earning and providing aswell as protecting.
This is a balance that is perfect and has always worked and is the way Allah wanted things to be because that is the way he created us but nowaays we see that people want to go away from this and be equal in roles.
Especially here in the west we are seeing increasing problems with the mental development of children because of the fact that women are taking on the role of a man and increasingly couples are having to hire nannys to look after their children and because of the fact that children need their mothers in particluar and the mother is always working then the childs mental development is affected.
May Allah guide us to the right path. Ameen
Allah knows best
imsad
. I don't personally think marriage will be an issue to girls, dunno about there.
I really hope that your dreams will come true. All the best, sis!^^