I Need To Stop Her!

[Djinn]

It won't solve the issues with her self-esteem. The poor woman is probably wondering if she will even be able to get a husband. Let's face it physical beauty if very important to a lot of men (I've never met one that it wasn't important to).

It may be a sin but as long as society accepts physical beauty as important deciding factor for a wife, I think it's okay to get plastic surgery.

Well there is one replying to you, beauty is only skin deep. What see will your friend do when she'll start to get wrinkles. It's a vicious cycle, and it won't end with plastic surgery.

 

[searchingsoul]

Well there is one replying to you, beauty is only skin deep. What see will your friend do when she'll start to get wrinkles. It's a vicious cycle, and it won't end with plastic surgery.

I agree 100% but that doesn't address the issue of physical beauty being highly "important" in society. I'm just saying that the shallow nature of men seeking beautiful women probably isn't any bigger of a sin than plastic surgery.

 

[جوري]

I don't think you can scare someone into doing something if they have their mind set on doing it... I know there are lots of moral issues here... I'll tell you this much... have you discussed with your friend that she might have a syndrome called (BDD) it is called body dysmorphic disorder... it is a serious illness which can't be cured by any amount of surgery... how about finding your sister a psychitrist or a counselor to get to the bottom of this rather than treating it artificially? If you are in the NY area I can recommend a muslim psychitrist if she would be more comfortable... I think everyone should consider some counseling before taking on a life altering or body altering decision... I will not judge your friend I think ultimately it is something between her and God... not all of us her and God...

 

[Angel]

god! pple can be soo mean sometimes , reali wat right do they have to call her ugly ,arghh!! they should look at themselves before insulting your sister, maybe who knows they are the ugle ones and just to make thmeselves feel good they call her ugly god!!. Sis no one is ugly in this world,its the way allah(swt) created us and no matter wat we should be content with our looks ,i know u might think its easier said than done but we have to try. Beacuse at the end of the day we are not pleasing pple we are pleasing Allah. Sis i feel for u and ur sister, i cant imagine wat she is going through and all i can help u with is to make Dua for ur sister and pray to Allah to sooth the pain people inflicted in her. Only Allah can help her.
And remember looks dont matter wat maters most is who u are deep inside and how you treat others.
And also keep reminding your sis that no mater wat or no mater how u lok Allah is always there for her.
May Allah help you and ur sister

 

[islamrules]

I am so worried for my sister! Subxanallah she hates her face and her looks she has been hurt by people calling her ugly and fat before and now she thinks plastic surgery is her only choice.
She is a muslim and practise believe it or not. Plastic surgery is haram she wants her face redone, nose, eyes,the bone structure, liposuction and on.
I though she was joking but she is not How can I stop her???

that's really sad, people these days, they are just plain mean.:heated:

sis remind your sister about the akhira and that she will one day die. and that how she looked wouldn't matter, and that it would be up to her good deeds and sins that will decide if she goes to jannah or hell.

sometimes it works, it wakes people up and reminds them of the hereafter and why they are on this world, which is to please allah and not people.

may allah guide your sister and all muslims who are misguided.

 

[S_87]

i would say get her counselling. beauty problems can stem from the same as anoerxia problems when girls believe they are ugly when they arent really

 

[جوري]

i would say get her counselling. beauty problems can stem from the same as anoerxia problems when girls believe they are ugly when they arent really

yup that is a very sane advise.... there are Muslim psychiatrists and counselors who can and will help... If she is getting surgery or told that it is a cardinal sin it might not fix the problem in fact it can cause her to go deeper into depression as she tries to form an equilibrium between her beliefs ... society and her own self-image ... please do the sound thing and refer your sister to a doctor or a counselor ... if you are in NY please PM and I'll leave you the contact numbers of a Muslim psychiatrist... a couple of sessions can might help her get to the roots of all of this...

 

[جوري]

BY the way and this is just me not a religious scholar speaking... but, I don't believe that everyone who gets plastic surgery or reconstructive plastic surgery is going to hell.... Allah has created this universe and has made it very sophisticated ... let's not echo our sentiment of what is wrong or right without knowing the full story I promise I am not advocating plastic surgery for vanity ... we are all different people and pursue things for different reasons.... I know of a man who had a rare form of fungus that affects diabetics (mucor) which can only be cured by debridement if not it travels quickly to the brain and a person might die within a few days... Thankfully they were able to debride it away by removing a large chunk of his nose and face ... and he got a plastic nose which he wears every day and some reconstructive surgery...still looks unattractive but was better than being dead. it aids in his breathing.. So let's not judge people and admonish them.... We are all in God's hands.... Wallah A3lam....

 

[جوري]

thought you guys might enjoy this
http://politicalhumor.about.com/library/blbushisms.htm
http://dubyaspeak.com/

 

[limitless]

I agree 100% but that doesn't address the issue of physical beauty being highly "important" in society. I'm just saying that the shallow nature of men seeking beautiful women probably isn't any bigger of a sin than plastic surgery.

Yes, of course beauty matters, even to women. I highly doubt they would marry a guy who is not beautiful. But when I write of this beauty I am reffering to inner beauty. I am most likely one of the brothers who are attractive to inner beauty, the personality, I would never marry a sister for her phyiscal beauty. There are men like me, that honestly will tell you face to face that inner beauty is more important than the physical one and I apply this in reality as often as I can.

Now to the main topic. You should tell her to lose weight, simply it will solve her issue. I used to be plump, but I lost my weight by working out and maintaing it, it is difficult, but after you lose it, you gain such incredible amount of confidence. You should tell her that her motablism isn't fast so she should watch what she eats and keep a strict time delay between meals, but she can not, tell her to eat fruits (exclude banana they intend to increase fat or lipds in your body). Or to keep her selfbusy because if she isn not busy or hanging out with friends who are beautiful then she will down, you should spend time with her, show her howother people are suffering and the killings of muslims that is going on in the world.

Hope that helps. May Allah guide her and give her strength to be strong in her faith.

 

[Ameeratul Layl]

Salam,

Ask your sister to join this forum.
Then, let me know when she has.

Wasalam