Assalamualaikum brother,
The situation that I m in, my husband is not using me for his bodily needs. He is taking complete financial care of me n my kids. Yes but to spare his love/ lust( he can't love anybody if he can't love his wife) and money he has quite many options. I have two small kids whom I can't leave with a person like him plus I don't have financial strength or parents support to upbring my kids. He has recorded my calls so he knows that I was indulged in shirk. But he has been cheating on me ever since I know him for 8 years before our marriage.. I don't know really what to do. I m already wrinkled and trashed from within. Also he is frustrated about what I have done to him. ( If he can't b mine physically then none else can own him) he is more frustrated from me. The magician refused to reverse that thing and says people come to me and then they ask to reverse the done but after sometime they again ask to do the same thing again. I m in the middle of nowhere. I really need peace. My life can't continue like this.
Sister, your biggest problem is your obsession with your husband. You want things to go how you want things to go, not how things go as they are destined to go. To give you a example. When you pour some water on the ground and leave it be, it will flow the easiest way down. It will NOT go as for example how YOU want it to go. This life is the same, we only are carried through it it not knowing where it will bring us or what situation we will face. I have read your topic last night, but i decided to not reply to it, as many other brothers and sisters already commented on it.
However, i guess Allah(swt) made it so, that i have to reply to your problem. As this is what i mean with sometimes it cannot go as we want it. I did NOT want to reply to it, but it is NOT up to me what i want or not want, Allah(swt) made you reply on my comment in this topic that i cannot decide to "ignore" it. So Allah(swt) chooses also my path.
You have NO and i mean ABSOLUTELY NO trust in Allah(swt). You THINK you control everything, but the ONLY control you and i have is the choice Allah(swt) gives us. Do you choose good or do you choose bad? Nothing else.
Rasullah(saws) has said that what kind of spouse we have to choose to marry. In case of sisters, they have to choose a spouse that has good character and practices his deen accordingly. This was your first biggest mistake and you can only blame yourself. As you yourself said that you and him already committed sin before marrying one another. So don't be surprised that your husband is like this, as you have not followed Islam properly to have a successful marriage.
Because you are obsessed with him, you are capable of all sort of things. I mean doing even shirk by using black magic says two things. You have committed shirk and thus left Islam and your husband has very weak imaan, or else it would have no effect on people with strong imaan as far as i know. So your marriage already was based on .."yeah we are Muslim"..that is enough type of mentality you could almost say.
When one marries a spouse ..in other words completes his or her deen, the connection between you and him or him and you is Allah(swt). When your spouse dies, you know he is not death, but has returned to Allah(swt). However, this connection it seems you do not have. You are so to say emotionally directly attached to your husband instead first to Allah(swt) and then through Allah to your husband. If you would have emotionally attached to your husband through Allah. Than you would have easily let him(your husband) go. It is NOT your husband who takes care of you. It is Allah. Allah gives you food to eat, Allah gives you shelter, Allah gives you children, Allah gives you eyes to see, air to breath, tongue to speak. EVERYTHING is because of Allah. That Allah(swt) let your husband do what he wanted to do, is NOT Allah(swt) fault, it is YOUR fault. You married him and it was YOUR choice as any real practicing sister or brother would have already said that that guy wasn't a good choice to marry.
So the question is, what now?
- Stop this nonsense this instance..the whole shirk stuff, as you want things to go how you want it to go. It is Allah(swt) who decides how things should go (destiny). Give up your whole obsession with your husband.
- Second thing, renew your Islam, as you currently are NOT a Muslim.
- Third thing, make genuinely tubaw (repentance).
- Fourth thing, Allah(swt) will take care of you even if you might think everything will head towards bad. Never think it will head towards bad. I mean you have committed shirk YET Allah(swt) has NOT ordained till now that you should die. This is ALSO part of his mercy so you have time to make tubaw.
- Let things go as they are destined to go, like water going its own way. Surrender your control as Allah(swt) is the One in control.
If your husband stays with you and stops doing all those stuff..then he stays with you..if your husband does not stay with you..then he does not stay with you. If your husband still commits adultery with other women then divorce him.
Surrender to Allah(swt) and say to Him i give up as You are in charge and i know You do not bring any harm to your servants if they decide to follow Your path.
BTW: Do not go to that magician anymore. So also not to "undo" as you still believe they have the power, however they have NO power. It is Allah(swt) who is permitting them to do those stuff.
Also read your own topic as many brothers and sisters are giving good advice regarding tubaw.
Peace and take care.
