If U have a best friend through internet, can he be closer to you than your cousin?

[racheljeon]

please talk turkey

 

[Tyrion]

please talk turkey

Gobble gobble?



Seriously though, I'm confused. ^o) But the simple answer to your title is "no"...

 

[Dagless]

Seriously though, I'm confused. ^o) But the simple answer to your title is "no"...

I don't know what the situation is either but to even things up I'll go with "yes".

 

[marwen]

I put yes. A friend can be closer than a cousin, he can be a brother in islam, where brotherhood in islam is closer than blood brotherhood. Through internet it's possible too, if he is a genuine brother.

 

[Endymion]

I can say this without any doubt internet give me amazing friends and i truly love them but the thing is that,whether they are my internet friends or my real life friends,i always keep a distance between me and them.I never tell my friends about my private matters,never share anything which i want to hide from others.I think its a wise behavior :shade:

 

[Mr.President]

bro saying things to cousine ? "r u freaking out of your mind ?"

I would never ever do tht mistake again
!
if I did tht
thts it my cousins will eat me up like hungry hayeenas

understand the difference friend doesn't have any hidden meanings but cousins he/she will collect alot of sins by joking abt u infront of ur family


BTW IT DEPENDS ON UR COUSINS TYPE IS HE/SHE A HAYEENA ?

 

[Danah]

I said "yes" simply because Allah had blessed me with best friends who are like sisters to me in the Internet.

 

[Soulja Girl]

Blood is thicker than Water.. :><:

I mean its just harder to trust someone online.. You don't know who they are for starters, complete strangers..

Of course you can make some lovely friends online.. But there should be that barrier in between cuz at the end of the day, your family will ALWAYS be there for you, depending on how close your relationship is with em..

& well as for online people, you can't always guarantee they'll be there for you..

:wa:

 

[GuestFellow]

I rarely talk to my cousins and I don't think I have a best fwend. I don't know really...

 

[Scimitar]

What is this talk of friendship?

In Islam there is no such thing as "friendship".

Imam Ali said "You are either my brother in Islam, or my equal in humanity"

The term friendship implies two things.

1) That you prefer "Friends over others"

2) That you have an emotional connection to someone which you don't consider your Brother, or your equal in Humanity. Reserve your emotional attachemments for your family and your brothers - and even then be mindful of how you carry this responsibility out. Favouring someone simply because you "like" them is not an Islamic practice - what it is though, is a practice borne of nafsi (your own desire/ego response).


Be on this world as if you are a stranger, a Ghuraba... If you like someone, it is probably because they have done you some justice in some form or another - it is therefore your right to return the favour, because you are now in debt to that person. *******izing that debt by giving it the term "friendship" is a core compromise of your own self worth. How weak we Muslims have become, preferring to to replace honourable justice with weakened terminology such as "friendship".

Let me tell you what friendship is like:

A friend is someone who will tell you what you like to hear. For example:

"No, you can't tell him that - it will hurt his feelings"

Now let me give you an example of brotherhood:

"Sorry bro, I know you won't like to hear this but it is for your own good. I noticed yesterday that..."

Islam: "Like for your brother what you like for yourself".

I hope this gets some of you thinking.

 

[m2p]

i heard a speech in which the speaker said that the prophet s.a.w has been reported to have said do not over love your friends because it may be that tommorow they will become your worst enemy and do not over hate your enemys as it may be that tommorow they become your habib

heres another one : The Messenger of Allah, peace and blessings be upon him, said: "The parable of a good friend and a bad friend is that of a carrier of musk and a blacksmith. The carrier of musk will give you some, or you will buy some, or you will notice a good smell; but as for the blacksmith, he will burn your clothes or you will notice a bad smell."

[Sahih Muslim, Book of Righteousness, Hadith #6692]

be careful who you choose the quran says that on the day of judgement some people will say : Ah! Woe to me! Would that I had never taken such-and-such as a friend!" Noble Qur'an (25:28)

check this vid out but include the dots when copy and pasting (had to remove dots to enable me to the put the link otherwise it wont let me because im new)

www youtube com watch?v=0R-NwrSjo5A

 

[m2p]

"The Believers are but a single Brotherhood: So make peace and reconciliation between your two (contending) brothers; and fear Allah, that ye may receive Mercy." (Sura Al-Hujurat ayah #10)

[SIZE=+1]The Prophet sallallaahu 'alayhi wa sallam said: "Whosoever leaves off obedience and separates from the Jamaa'ah and dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah. Whoever fights under the banner of the blind, becoming angry for 'asabiyyah (partisanship and party s pirit), or calling to 'asabiyyah, or assisting 'asabiyyah, then dies, he dies a death of jaahiliyyah."[/SIZE][SIZE=+1]Related by Muslim in his Saheeh (6/21), from Abu Hurayrah radiallaahu anhu.[/SIZE]

 

[Endymion]

There is a huge difference between a cousin and a sister that is why i did not mention my sis/bro's.But if the question was to choose one from friend and sis/bro,i would choose my siblngs because no friend can be like them.

There is a very beautiful example by Ali RA explain the difference between a friend and a brother.

"Somebody asked Hazrat Ali what the difference is between a brother and a friend. He said “a brother is like gold and a friend is like diamond.” So the man asked why are you giving more value to the friend, a diamond is worth more? Imam replied “If gold cracks you can melt it and make it just like it was before. If a diamond cracks, it can never be like it was before.”

 

[Insaanah]

In Islam there is no such thing as "friendship".

This is a quite a serious statement to make, and needs to be backed up by Qur'an or hadeeth. The quote from Hadrat Ali (may Allah be pleased with him) does not show that there is no such thing as friendship in Islam. We have brotherhood with all Muslims, and feel naturally closer to those with whom we have day to day contact. However, that doesn't mean that we don't love our other brothers in Islam, or that we see them as inferior, or that we are being unjust.

The Qur'an and the ahadeeth show that friendship/close friendship is allowed, and in some cases can be a source of reward.

Abu Hurayra (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that the Prophet :saws: said, "There are seven whom Allah will shade with His shade on the day when there is no shade but His shade: a just Imam, a youth who grows up worshipping Allah, the Mighty and Exalted, a man whose heart is attached to the mosque, two men who love each other for the sake of Allah, meeting and parting for that reason alone, a man who refuses the advances of a noble and beautiful woman, saying, 'I fear Allah', a man who gives sadaqa and conceals it so that his left hand does not know what his right hand gives, and a man who remembers Allah when he is alone and his eyes overflow with tears." [Agreed upon - Sahîh al-Bukhârî (660) and Sahîh Muslim (1031)]

Now these two men loving each other for the sake of Allah, does that mean that they saw their other brothers in Islam as inferior, or that they were unjust to them? No. Love between friends is a natural and human thing, and even Rasoolullah :saws: said, "If I were to have taken anyone from among my ummah as a khaleel (close friend), I would have taken Abu Bakr as a khaleel." Source http://www.islamqa.com/en/ref/34621/friends

And it was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: "My close friend (khaleel – i.e. the Prophet :saws enjoined three things upon me that I will not give up until I die: fasting three days of each month, praying Duha, and sleeping after Witr." (Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 1124; Muslim, 721).

The Qur'an also shows that close friendship is allowed:

Sahih International
Close friends, that Day, will be enemies to each other, except for the righteous (43:67)

Let me tell you what friendship is like:

A friend is someone who will tell you what you like to hear. For example:

"No, you can't tell him that - it will hurt his feelings"

I disagree. A true friend will advise you correctly, even if it's something you don't want to hear. To say that friends do not advise correctly, is wrong. There are many beautiful friendships out there where people who are not related love each other for the sake of Allah, and do their best to help each other to righteousness, without thinking any the less of all their brothers in Islam. This includes internet friends, who are the most amazing sisters I could ever hope to meet. May all Muslims be blessed with such good friends, ameen.

 

[Ghazalah]

One of my closest friends I met online. She's amazing. Not only helps me with my deen but she reminds me of Islam. My cousin on the other hand is completely the opposite.

However, the situation can change for different people, one answer cannot be applied to everyone.

 

[Scimitar]

I disagree. A true friend will advise you correctly, even if it's something you don't want to hear. To say that friends do not advise correctly, is wrong. There are many beautiful friendships out there where people who are not related love each other for the sake of Allah, and do their best to help each other to righteousness, without thinking any the less of all their brothers in Islam. This includes internet friends, who are the most amazing sisters I could ever hope to meet. May all Muslims be blessed with such good friends, ameen.

I liked your post Insaanah. You wrote "A true friend will advise you correctly, even if it's something you don't want to hear." And I say, anyone who does that for me, I look upon them as my brother. Or my equal in humanity.

To quote the same line again: "A true friend will advise you correctly, even if it's something you don't want to hear." - this is more often than not, the exception, rather than the rule. Hence, friendships in modern day, is a misunderstood ideal, and taken out of practical context when people choose to make friends based on how well their nafs are stroked by eachother.

In Islam, we have a better way of including someone in our inner circle - by calling them, and treating them like a brother, or sister... And I prefer this outlook.

You also wrote: "There are many beautiful friendships out there where people who are not related love each other for the sake of Allah, and do their best to help each other to righteousness, without thinking any the less of all their brothers in Islam."


Really now? So you'd rather give them a title of friend over Brother? or Sister? seems like a splitting of hairs to me...

You went on to end with this: "May all Muslims be blessed with such good friends, ameen." ... If you like them that much, why not just call them brother or sister? You see my point?

 

[ardianto]

You also wrote: "There are many beautiful friendships out there where people who are not related love each other for the sake of Allah, and do their best to help each other to righteousness, without thinking any the less of all their brothers in Islam."


Really now? So you'd rather give them a title of friend over Brother? or Sister? seems like a splitting of hairs to me...

So, why we call companion of Rasulullah as "sahaba (friends) of Rasulullah", not "ikhwan (brothers) of Rasulullah" ?.

 

[Insaanah]

I liked your post Insaanah. You wrote "A true friend will advise you correctly, even if it's something you don't want to hear." And I say, anyone who does that for me, I look upon them as my brother. Or my equal in humanity.

You seem to be working on the premise that a friend cannot be a brother at the same time. All Muslims are brothers. Even to the extent that a husband is brother in Islam to his wife. But does she say, this is my brother, or refer to him as brother? No. Even though he is a brother in Islam, she addresses him and refers to him according to his role in her life, which is husband. And the same applies vice versa.

To quote the same line again: "A true friend will advise you correctly, even if it's something you don't want to hear." - this is more often than not, the exception, rather than the rule.

I have no idea how most friendships are, as I don't know about them, but can only speak about the many I do know about.

In Islam, we have a better way of including someone in our inner circle - by calling them, and treating them like a brother, or sister... And I prefer this outlook.

I have gone with what Qur'an and hadeeth show and allow, rather than my own outlook.

Really now? So you'd rather give them a title of friend over Brother? or Sister? seems like a splitting of hairs to me...

The fact that all Muslims are brothers and sisters goes without saying. But we address and refer to them according to their role in our lives, like mother, father, teacher, friend.

You went on to end with this: "May all Muslims be blessed with such good friends, ameen." ... If you like them that much, why not just call them brother or sister? You see my point?

I explained this above. You are entitled to your point, but you need to back it up by Qur'an and ahadeeth.

So, why we call companion of Rasulullah as "sahaba (friends) of Rasulullah", not "ikhwan (brothers) of Rasulullah" ?.

Technically, a sahaabi is defined as any person who had the privilege of meeting the Prophet :saws: and died believing in him. But the most famous sahaabah are those who were his companions, and the term is commonly used to mean that.

Source: Usool al-Hadeeth: The Methodology of Hadeeth Evaluation, by Dr Abu Ameenah Bilal Philips, Inetrnational Islamic Publishing House (PDF page 10)

And Allah knows best in all matters.

 

[ardianto]

Technically, a sahaabi is defined as any person who had the privilege of meeting the Prophet and died believing in him. But the most famous sahaabah are those who were his companions.

I know what is "sahaabi/sahaabah" but I couldn't find the accurate English word for it.

In Indonesian language we classify "friend" into two level. The first is "teman/kawan", this is usual/ordinary friend. The second is "sahabat", this is 'high level' friend or friend who very close. We call sahaabi as "sahabat Rasul" not "teman/kawan Rasul" because this friendship is 'high level' friendship.

Thanks for your response, sister.

 

[Scimitar]

Sister Insaanah - I think we are both saying the same thing, in different ways. However, I still don't believe that friendships in modern day are true to their intent and purposes. If we look at someone as a friend, we can easily be misled into differentiating their importance over brothers and sisters - when the truth is, one must treat everyone the same. Without bias or prejudice, unless they are committing evil, in which case - one must try to stop them either physically or verbally, or ask Allah to save them from the fitna of it.

I explained this above. You are entitled to your point, but you need to back it up by Qur'an and ahadeeth.

With regard to quoting Quraan, and hadeeth - I am very careful where and how I do it. It is not a matter to just throw out there.