I'm having a baby that i didn't want.

Can she not just get married now? what is the ruling on that, I am sorry I didn't have time to browse through all 5 pages..

I imagine this is a very difficult situation, but I can't entertain the thought of an abortion whether it is haram or not.. it is a human life we are talking about here, so helpless and in your hands.. sob7an Allah.. may Allah swt make it easy on you dear sister..

If there is nothing to forbid a marriage now (islamically speaking) then I think that is the most logical thing to do.. you don't need a big ceremony.. just the parties involved and those who need to be involved...

and Allah swt knows best

:wa:
 
AnonymousGender said:
I am really looking for the best and most suitable advice, so please help me here. It's a very sensitive issue for me as well.

I'm 18 years old. A couple of days ago, i found out that i could be 4-5 weeks pregnant (it has still not been confirmed by a doctor), and in those few days, it has changed my entire outlook on life.
I am now suffering the punishment of the biggest mistake i have made in my wholee life and i know that all i can do now is repent and keep asking Allah (swt) for forgiveness in the hope that He will, and change myself for the better.
I was given advice that i cannot go ahead with an abortion as it is considered as murder in Islam at any stage of pregnancy. I have also been advised that marriage during a womens pregnancy will be considered as invalid.
However, i cannot tell my parents or family because i am SO scared of upsetting them. I really don't know what to do and i am afraid of what is going to happen. Please, please make dua for us. I really, really hope that the Almighty will be able to forgive us somehow.

I am getting a lot of support from my OH and some of his family (he will tell his parents once it is confirmed) and also some close friends. I'm also in education at university, living away from my family home. (We're both Muslim).
So far, i'm trying to take everything positively as it is not the baby's fault and i will have to do whatever it takes, i really am not a bad person. Although, sometimes i feel so depressed and worried that i'm not so certain anymore on what to do, how to react and even sometimes i contemplate on keeping the baby or not... imsad .

I have realised that what i have done was a very big mistake and i am ready to face the consequences but i just cannot face my family or tell them.
This is very hard. Please advise me further if you can. imsad
Click to expand...


sister il tel u a story about my sister who went thru the same!hope fully shes repented to Allah.....am the first born n shes second,she got pregnt while in high school bt i didnt know,the guy sent his grandmother to our family to ask to marry her as quickly as possible,,,my dad was suspicious n he ended up finding out that she was pregnant,,,,,,,,i was shocked as i fear for her n the baby cos my family was one crazy one!u cant imagine what she went through she was beaten up by my dad n my uncle with one piece of wood that broke from a bed both at the same time.i was working n when i came home i was told wat happend i culdnt biliv!i just went to c my sister n she was swollen on her back n tha face n she was crying.n my dad was seating outside raging wth anger!i was so angry at them for doing dat n i didnt care about him as my father as i just wanted to know y he did that to her.n i had de courage to tell him he did wrong n but he doesnt like to b told n he shouted at me n he ended up hiting me outside infront of evryone with slaps n smucks!

later during the day he came up wth the solution,abortion.tell u wat my big cousin brother n me were ready to do wat it takes to save the baby from abortion.BUT ALLAH'plans r always better,we recieved visas to come to uk from my mother,alhamdullihah i was so relieved to know that we were coming to our mother n she was going to be taken care of.we came to uk met our mum from 10 past years weve been apart.she gave birth to a girl n shes now 1 and half years.shes amazing.....when they heard de baby was born they wanted pisctures of her..now shes recieving financial support from the gorv. al that my dad n de rest did to her they r now coling her n asking her to send them money n she is helping them for the sake of Allah.n where do u think the money is coming from ofcourse from the baby she had, throu benefit,which they insisted she do abortion.

i just hope this story will inspire u to have faith n patient in Allah only if u rilly regret wat u did.regret is tawbah.

my opinion is ur parents nid to know they ll come round n dont get tayad asking for forgivenes from them even if it will take al ur life.

May Allah make it easy for u give u health,strength n forgive u n us n save us from punishment of the grave n hell fire!

il make dua for u,inshallah!
 
:sl:
InshaAllah I hope your situation becomes easier!
Why is haram to marry while pregnant? I mean I realise perhaps if there was some sort of confusion with regard to who the father was, then perhaps it would be better to not marry. Is there a evidence for your statement bro? Not that I am implying your lying- just I have never heard this and know of a sister who married while pregnant.
OP Sister, I wish I knew how to advise you..I can't imagine how difficult things must be for you.
May Allah guide you, and make things easy for you and your family!
Take care
 
OurIslamic said:
Salam,

It is haram to marry during pregnancy.
Click to expand...

Can you elaborate or direct me to some hadith ayah or ruling that declares it haram. I have never heard of it being haram to marry during pregnancy, if it is haram how come it's never mentioned I can see i'm not the only one expressing confusion to this. It's very common for people to choose or to be forced to get married in situations like this so they don't shame the family and themselves.
salam
 
I think it has been explained extensively in previous posts why marriage during pregnancy is haram
 
well one of the posters posted a hadith stating that it is okay before the first six months because this verifies the paternity of the father while somebody else is saying that they should get married because a zaani has to repent and the womb has to be "clean".
Is there a definite answer? the many answers just bring about confusion
salam
 
Lisa0 said:
well one of the posters posted a hadith stating that it is okay before the first six months because this verifies the paternity of the father while somebody else is saying that they should get married because a zaani has to repent and the womb has to be "clean".
Is there a definite answer? the many answers just bring about confusion
salam
Click to expand...

Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, my sister this is the danger of sections of the forums like this where lay people are issuing fatwas of whats halal and haram without any knowledge of the subject matter. Here is scholarly take on the subject matter with referance:

....Marriage to a pregnant woman is permissible and also sexual intercourse if the impregnator himself is marrying. (Radd al-Muhtar, 3/48-49), provided the woman is a Muslim or a genuine Kitabi (from the people of the book).

Secondly, as far as the child is concerned, if the child is born six months or more after the time of marriage (nikah), paternity will be established and the child will be attributed to the husband. However, if the child is born before six months have elapsed, it will not be attributed to the husband. (Radd al-Muhtar, 3/49)

Therefore, I suggest that the brother should get the non-Muslim girl converted to Islam. She should be educated with the fundamental beliefs of Islam, and her conversion should not merely be a solution to the problem. After she genuinely and truly accepts Islam, he should marry her as soon as possible. You sate that she is less than three weeks pregnant; hence there is still time for the child to be considered legitimate. If the child is born six months or more after the time of marriage, the brother will be considered a legitimate father. In this way, he will also be able to ensure that the child has an Islamic upbringing.

And Allah knows best

Mufti Muhammad ibn Adam
Darul Iftaa
Leicester , UK.

Source:http://www.central-mosque.com/fiqh/aforn1.htm
 
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It seems there are differing opinions as to whether one can marry.
The main reason though is in case of the paternaty of the baby. So if you are sure of the paternity, there are scholars who say you can marry.
So do so. Don't mess up your situation for rigidity.

Peace
 
Hamza81 said:
Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, my sister this is the danger of sections of the forums like this where lay people are issuing fatwas of whats halal and haram without any knowledge of the subject matter. Here is scholarly take on the subject matter with referance:

....Marriage to a pregnant woman is permissible and also sexual intercourse if the impregnator himself is marrying. (Radd al-Muhtar, 3/48-49), provided the woman is a Muslim or a genuine Kitabi (from the people of the book).

Secondly, as far as the child is concerned, if the child is born six months or more after the time of marriage (nikah), paternity will be established and the child will be attributed to the husband. However, if the child is born before six months have elapsed, it will not be attributed to the husband. (Radd al-Muhtar, 3/49)

Therefore, I suggest that the brother should get the non-Muslim girl converted to Islam. She should be educated with the fundamental beliefs of Islam, and her conversion should not merely be a solution to the problem. After she genuinely and truly accepts Islam, he should marry her as soon as possible. You sate that she is less than three weeks pregnant; hence there is still time for the child to be considered legitimate. If the child is born six months or more after the time of marriage, the brother will be considered a legitimate father. In this way, he will also be able to ensure that the child has an Islamic upbringing.

And Allah knows best

Muhammad ibn Adam
Darul Iftaa
Leicester , UK.

Source:http://www.central-mosque.com/fiqh/aforn1.htm
Click to expand...

JazzakAllah bro for the clarification
salam
 
I agree with Skye. If you can get the Nikah done right now (Islamically speaking) then go for it, asap.
 

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