I'm really angry!!!!!!!

[Snowflake]

Ok, I'm really mad right now. There is a wedding hall near my house and just as I was praying Maghrib, they started beating the drums really loud. I was fuming but prayed to Allah to give them hidayah.. I was enjoying my salah so much but that stupid drumming made my blood boil.. I'm really angry. It's started again now!!! The worst thing is the mosque is slightly opposite the wedding hall and I was getting more angry thinking about the woshippers being disturbed by it too.

I'd decided to go there after prayer and do something! But what??? It's driving me mad that these muslims have no shame or consideration for others. I was going to tell them to stop this nonsense as it's unislamic.. but I dunno if that is the best approach? I'm too mad to think straight. So plz give me some ideas. This will go on all summer cuz of the wedding season.

This is too much for me to ignore. I need tips on how I can make it stop ffended:

 

[extinction]

well if you are really really wanting to do something I say go there find someone important to speak to and ask him/her to announce over the speaker to keep it down.........but I dont think its going to work or you could always call the cops..in america there is a law called "disturbance of the peace" dont know if they have that where you are

 

[Snowflake]

Salam

The cops won't do anything. They dont class this as an emergency and always come when it's all over. And who can I ask to do what you suggested? The man who owns the hall won't tell people who hired it not to play drums cuz he'll lose his bookings.

 

[extinction]

a person like the father of the groom or someone who is in charge of the wedding not neccassarily the owner of the hall

 

[Snowflake]

Ok, I'm going. Let's see what happens. Gulp!

 

[extinction]

good luck!!!!!!!!!

 

[Snowflake]

I wish!

I went to the mosque and they've got something going on there. So I spoke to the brother at the gates. He was like errrrrrrrrrrrrr.......... the imaam is really old and he won't want to get into anything like that. Can you believe that!? I was like well I was hoping some brothers can speak to the owner and ask him to ban drums etc.. Then he said he'll pass my message on. I bet ya he won't! Some drastic action is needed and it looks like I have to take matters in my own hands. Just wait til the next wedding. I'm going to arm myself with printouts and give them to all the guests telling them that this kind of thing is haraam as well as the mixing of opposite sexes. Good idea eh? :?

Honest if you rely on people nothing ever gets done!

 

[extinction]

oh man!! well next time you could call the cops? or speak to a person at the wedding before hand and tell them what your views are

 

[HeiGou]

I went to the mosque and they've got something going on there. So I spoke to the brother at the gates. He was like errrrrrrrrrrrrr.......... the imaam is really old and he won't want to get into anything like that. Can you believe that!? I was like well I was hoping some brothers can speak to the owner and ask him to ban drums etc.. Then he said he'll pass my message on. I bet ya he won't! Some drastic action is needed and it looks like I have to take matters in my own hands. Just wait til the next wedding. I'm going to arm myself with printouts and give them to all the guests telling them that this kind of thing is haraam as well as the mixing of opposite sexes. Good idea eh? :?

Honest if you rely on people nothing ever gets done!

I am impressed with your courage and determination. I really am. I think, I know!, I would have sat at home and fumed quietly.

But may I please ask you to consider the poor bride at the next wedding. I am not trying to talk you out of protesting, but this will be her one big day (or I hope it will be the only one she goes to as a bride). She is not solely responsible for what her family or her in-laws plan. But if you make an unpleasant scene she will suffer the most. So could I please, as politely as possible, ask you to make a low-key polite protest that gets the message across to the people that matter without upseting everyone and ruining one poor girls big day?

 

[Far7an]

Drums or Duff?

 

[extinction]

I am impressed with your courage and determination. I really am. I think, I know!, I would have sat at home and fumed quietly.

But may I please ask you to consider the poor bride at the next wedding. I am not trying to talk you out of protesting, but this will be her one big day (or I hope it will be the only one she goes to as a bride). She is not solely responsible for what her family or her in-laws plan. But if you make an unpleasant scene she will suffer the most. So could I please, as politely as possible, ask you to make a low-key polite protest that gets the message across to the people that matter without upseting everyone and ruining one poor girls big day?

excellent point...but I think if she spoke to someone before hand it would be handled with discretion......and no one would probably suspect much.....the brides happiness is key but more important is Allahs happiness.......

 

[Snowflake]

Drums or Duff?

Drums (bhangra style)

HeiGou;267325]I am impressed with your courage and determination. I really am. I think, I know!, I would have sat at home and fumed quietly.

Well I say... I don't think it was brave of me to do what is right. I think that should be the norm, not exceptional. I guess it just seems brave because too many people nowadays wait for others to make things happen. And I've learnt that that is the worst one can expect.

But may I please ask you to consider the poor bride at the next wedding. I am not trying to talk you out of protesting, but this will be her one big day (or I hope it will be the only one she goes to as a bride). She is not solely responsible for what her family or her in-laws plan. But if you make an unpleasant scene she will suffer the most. So could I please, as politely as possible, ask you to make a low-key polite protest that gets the message across to the people that matter without upseting everyone and ruining one poor girls big day?

Definitely! I have no intention on ruining the brides day. That would be very unislamic. And of course you're right that she is not responsible for everything that goes on. I am simply going to request politely, giving islamic reasons, why this nuisance should be stopped. However I shall still distribute information on this matter amonsgt the guests, in the hope that someone will refrain from doing the same at their wedding.

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

noise is ALWAYS made weneva i try pray at work or outside or newhere. i just ignore it and pray these fishes learn sum manners and respect. Whats the point of getting angry? I kno sometimes it cant be helped but just think, whats the point? Anger is like nothing, it means nothing to no1 aswell. Me getting angry at my coleagues will solve nothing either. lol

 

[Snowflake]

excellent point...but I think if she spoke to someone before hand it would be handled with discretion......and no one would probably suspect much.....the brides happiness is key but more important is Allahs happiness.......

I don't plan to approach the bride. I think it's a lil too late for that :giggling:
And beforehand is pointless as they've already booked the DJ and drummer. The aim is to stop this happening on a large scale. InshaAllah when I get my blasted printer working, I'll do printouts and distribute them wherever possible. I reckon everyone should do it in their own city too.

Come on ppl, let's make some effort to spread Islam actively.

 

[edil]

Asalamu Caleykum sister muslimah I know how you feel because I have a neighbor who turns on the music so loud that the wall shakes so as you see your not the only one who goes through this and but you have to do what our beloved prophet did have patient because anger isnt the answer I know how hurt you are but at the same time you have to remember that were suppose to be the models for the disbelievers and the bad muslims and Allah might guide them to the straight path.

 

[Snowflake]

noise is ALWAYS made weneva i try pray at work or outside or newhere. i just ignore it and pray these fishes learn sum manners and respect. Whats the point of getting angry? I kno sometimes it cant be helped but just think, whats the point? Anger is like nothing, it means nothing to no1 aswell. Me getting angry at my coleagues will solve nothing either. lol

You have more patience than me bro. But anger can be very productive. I don't find it annoying to myself only, but I am thinking of others who have to put up with this. I know when my son was little, he would wake up with the slightest noise. So some poor mother who's probably just got her baby off to sleep only to be woken by that noise is not going to very happy. Then again someone mightbe ill etc. Imagine how they must feel. And it's not just the fact that it is annoying but that for muslims to be acting like this is haraam too.
There's no prophets here to put the muslim world to rights. So we have to take the responsiblity and do our bit. Even if a few change because we helped them see the truth, then I'll be a very happy woman.

 

[aamirsaab]

Muslimah_sis, I feel your pain. Honest. Last sunday I went to a wedding. Final rakka of dhur (i had to pray by myself cus we came late, pakistanis are known for that) and then the guy on the microphone (connected to speakers INSIDE the prayer room) says in a strong typical pakistani accent: "Everybody, please come to your seats, lunch will be served soon". It was well loud too so it put me off namaz. Managed to finish the last rakkah and then I ran - i'm not getting late for me lunch, oh no.

Note: You will only ever see a pakistani run for two reasons: 1) being chased by a large group of people (who probably want to beat him up) and/or 2) to get his food whilst it's still hot.

Turns out lunch wasn't served until an hour after that. Flippin pakis! .

 

[songinwind]

Asalamu Caleykum sister muslimah I know how you feel because I have a neighbor who turns on the music so loud that the wall shakes so as you see your not the only one who goes through this and but you have to do what our beloved prophet did have patient because anger isnt the answer I know how hurt you are but at the same time you have to remember that were suppose to be the models for the disbelievers and the bad muslims and Allah might guide them to the straight path.

I have to agree with you here, as I too have neighbors like this...and anger--The one that really hurts the most, is the one carrying it:X ...they can care less..as its a special day to them,and for me,"I'ed have to be really careful" here ...maybe if you do read all that our prophet went thur, and did with patance...this may help you..
You are very brave...But for me, I'ed have to think this thur...like with the neighbors...what will i achieve doing this?
Peace to you sister. may Allah bless you, and send u knowledge for best decision,ameen

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

You have more patience than me bro. But anger can be very productive. I don't find it annoying to myself only, but I am thinking of others who have to put up with this. I know when my son was little, he would wake up with the slightest noise. So some poor mother whose probably just got her baby off to sleep only to be woken by that noise is not going to very happy. Then again someone mightbe ill etc. Imagine how they must feel. And it's not just the fact that it is annoying but that for muslims to be acting like this is haraam too.
There's no prophets here to put the muslim world to rights. So we have to take the responsiblity and do our bit. Even if a few change because we helped them see the truth, then I'll be a very happy woman.

i see where your coming from. Been thru this myself, once my sister left her pram wiv me to go and check out some stores in whitechapel and some muslim men were smoking right next to the pram... lets just say in this one event i couldnt contain myself. So i did something... not the most beneficial thing but something . Anyway we should only act only wen absolutely necessary and when benefit will b the outcome not loss.

hope im making sence

 

[Snowflake]

Asalamu Caleykum sister muslimah I know how you feel because I have a neighbor who turns on the music so loud that the wall shakes so as you see your not the only one who goes through this and but you have to do what our beloved prophet did have patient because anger isnt the answer I know how hurt you are but at the same time you have to remember that were suppose to be the models for the disbelievers and the bad muslims and Allah might guide them to the straight path.

Oh man that kinda thing makes me cry. I used to live next door to a guy with mental problems and he use to blast his music all night long. His bedroom was right next to mine and I'd bang on the walls to no effect. I remember crying with frustration and lack of sleep. It was a nightmare. But I don't believe patience means suffering in silence. I think it's good to point things out to people and if they don't listen, then patience is the only thing left.

Flippin pakis! .

Lol, so true what you said about pakis. I am using all my restraining powers from saying anything more about our lovely people ;D

I have to agree with you here, as I too have neighbors like this...and anger--The one that really hurts the most, is the one carrying it:X ...they can care less..as its a special day to them,and for me,"I'ed have to be really careful" here ...maybe if you do read all that our prophet went thur, and did with patance...this may help you..
You are very brave...But for me, I'ed have to think this thur...like with the neighbors...what will i achieve doing this?
Peace to you sister. may Allah bless you, and send u knowledge for best decision,ameen

Ameen. May Allah bless you too-ameen. Of course we feel angry sis. We can't control our emotions, only how we react on them. True, the prophet (pbuh) was the epitome of patience, but I don't see anything wrong with requesting someone not to do something. I think patience is in controlling your anger when dealing with someone who's made you angry. I don't believe patience is in not saying anything and silently cursing anyone. I reckon it's good to make people aware of their wrongs. Diplomatically of course.

Abd'Majid;267913]Anyway we should only act only wen absolutely necessary and when benefit will b the outcome not loss.

I agree. Have you heard the saying? "It's not what you do, it's the way that you do it!" A lot of good can be achieved by doing something tactfully, without hurting or humiliating others.