Is seeking Reassurances sinful?

[Studentofdeed]

Unfortunately I have really bad OCD. I always feel scared of commiting sins and lying. I realize most of this is waswas. I am constantly feeling sinful. As a result I keep seeking reassurances even for decisions I take to know that are right. For example when I do istikhara, Allah gives me a result and response. I follow on it but then constantly need reassurances of whether I made the right choice or not. I feel guilty. Am I questioning Allah? Because I know Allah knows best. Will Allah forgive me for repeatedly asking for the same questions again? My OCD has gotten bit severe, I really hope Allah can forgive me. I feel so guitly that at times when Allah does, I feel disappointed. There are times I feel like I cannot do enough to thank Allah for all he is done.
Jazkllah Khayran

 

[Al-Ansariyah]

Assalamualaikum
Allah SWT knows about your problem. Has it ever happened that you changed your decision due to waswas? If no, then Satan's move is useless. It must be hard to ignore these but try not to act upon it. After istikhara, If you get waswas of choosing the option which wasn't in the best interest ,then look for the harmful impacts it might have or the constant signs of disapproval. Have you thought of seeking a psychologist for OCD? They provide with very good medications which are quite helpful. When you understand that you cannot do enough to thank Allah SWT , you have already thanked Him,Alhamdulillah.

 

[Studentofdeed]

Jazakallah Khayran sister. I was considering the medicine however the doctor I saw briefly mentioned that this medicine will effect my ability to perform in my studies. This medicine is more harmful than good. So I will have to combat this myself. I just feek guitly for seeking reassurances. But inshallah I will conquer this. May Allah bless you in both worlds. Ameen