Issue of working women

:salamext:

is so hard to find a female doctor...

and just imagine if all the nurse are males.

and wouldn't it be nice to have shops that sell by ladies to ladies...

Just imagine all the tailor are guys...

Just imagine all the school teachers are guys...

i even hate it when my gynae is a guy... :(
 
:sl:
true said sis. i have no problem if my sis, or my daughter wanted to become a doctor, for example. it bothers me when brothers are so against women working, but when their wife/sister/daughter needs a midwife for eg, they are the first to ask for a female doc.
what i strongly disagree with, however, is when this work interfers with 'wife and mother duties. 'no offence to anyone, but i find that children who have working mums, i dont know.....there seems to be somehting.....absent in thier personality. nothing extremley bad, but none the less, still absent. with all due respect.
PurestAmbrosia said:
:sl:
I can understand and sympathize with your discomfort, and at the same time feel intense disappointment that services that could be granted me by Muslims women I now have to seek from non-muslims, although I must admit al7mdlilah it is not often the case but a miniority of Muslims choose to keep their knowledge to themselves.
:w:
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good point

:sl:
 
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maryam11 said:
:sl:
but i find that children who have working mums, i dont know.....there seems to be somehting.....absent in thier personality. nothing extremley bad, but none the less, still absent. with all due respect.

good point

:sl:
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But nobody can't judge the working mothers and the way they brought up their children negatively.

There are mothers out there working but at the same time trying real hard to educate and brought up their children in islamic ways...

There are non-working mothers out there...but not appreciating and taking care their children in a way that it should be.

But there are also working mothers who try very very hard and sacrifice alot to their children...

And who are we to judge their intention of working and the way they brought up their children.

IMHO, 'the priority' that is important. Working or not...every woman should set their family as the first priority.

Every woman in my family members work...but they brought up their children Alhamdulillah the best they can. And Alhamdulillah i admire their hard work and sacrifices to their children... eventhough they are 'only' a working wife.
 
syilla said:
There are mothers out there working but at the same time trying real hard to educate and brought up their children in islamic ways...
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I never said anything about an islamic deficiency.
There are non-working mothers out there...but not appreciating and taking care their children in a way that it should be.
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true said.

And who are we to judge their intention of working and the way they brought up their children.
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where did i mention anyones intention :?

:sl:
 
sorry ukhtee...others are general statements...

absent in thier personality.
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for me...this is kinda being judgemental too...

and maybe is just me... :)
 
Bint Haneef said:
Entre-nous, PurestAmbrosia combien d’hommes reconnus comme des musulmans honnêtes ont des relations extra-maritales avec leurs secretaires ou collègues Kuffaar, sans que leurs épouses n’en sachent rien. J’en connais beaucoup malheureusement, même ceux dits pratiquants ne font pas d’exception. J’apprécie beaucoup votre raisonnement.
.
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Well...you have touched on something so important with the above... which I shan't translate, except to say, I am glad you notice the patent hypocrisy...

as for your own future, no one can decide that but you really... work is a necessity, in the very least so you may be able to perform one of the pillars of Islam (zakat) --It is always better to be the hand that gives than the hand that receives! I think the issue with you truthfully, is trying to abridge the gaps of people's expectations and perspective on you being what you are...and what you actually are.

an intelligent highly educated and I imagine a multilingual woman. You can soar high and see farther than every one else and answer your calling in this world, or you can hang around with people who out of projection of their own inadequacies, wish to bring you down to some low common denominator where it is easy to take you apart.

:w:
 
Assalamualaikum,

I appreciated what you wrote in your posts. I do not always check what's new on the forum (it goes so fast!) but I wanted to tell you that I fully agree with what you are saying - you are looking at things from a very practical point of view, while my main concern was - it is really islamic? I can understand - I guess you are from a western background - it is not seen as an offence as it is something natural nowadays that women work. But when I read the Quraan- the believing women are asked to stay at home - except in case of necessity and have been reading literatures about it, I just wanted some Shari'i proofs of all this.

But I do reckon your open-mindedness and maturity and really as you say - it's very difficult for someone to 'lure' you! since you prove to be very 'futée'. Rest assured, this is a compliment, I really appreciate the way you reply to posts. Keep it up! May Allaah increase you in knowledge.
 
maryam11 said:
:sl:
yeah, im not the one getting up at seven am , for a nine-five job.lol
:sl:
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:salamext:

Actually I wouldn’t mind at all, but I would prefer to let my husband work. Of course, if it comes to the position where I would have to work because of certain circumstances, then it’s kool. Just my 2 cents. :D
 
Bint Haneef said:
Assalamualaikum,

I appreciated what you wrote in your posts. I do not always check what's new on the forum (it goes so fast!) but I wanted to tell you that I fully agree with what you are saying - you are looking at things from a very practical point of view, while my main concern was - it is really islamic? I can understand - I guess you are from a western background - it is not seen as an offence as it is something natural nowadays that women work. But when I read the Quraan- the believing women are asked to stay at home - except in case of necessity and have been reading literatures about it, I just wanted some Shari'i proofs of all this.

But I do reckon your open-mindedness and maturity and really as you say - it's very difficult for someone to 'lure' you! since you prove to be very 'futée'. Rest assured, this is a compliment, I really appreciate the way you reply to posts. Keep it up! May Allaah increase you in knowledge.
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:sl:
to the contrary I am from a middle eastern background, and couldn't have had a more stingent upbringing aside from that lived in Saudi Arabia for 4 years and it is there where I learned of Muslim women leadership, every where from business to the battlefield... after finishing my bachelors and a few months into my masters I had to beg my dad for a 8-9 months to let me go for my doctorate and that was a chunk of time in my life I rather forget, when I got accepted he still refused and seats were limited, I thought it was over, bas al7mdlilah eventually he caved in and I renogotiated with the university... skimming over that period in two lines couldn't possibly describe what I actually lived through plus my own private hell out of fear of failure and having everyone tell me'I told you so'....

I couldn't advise you on the rest, I don't know how to harmonize this for you? It is much like a woman's prayer, sure she is preferred to pray at home, but you are not to stop her should she wish to pray in a mosque...

Think about this and reason...God who has made this world so expansive and sophisticated has surely understands well the psychology and the human condition. If every Muslim woman stayed at home, we'd seriousely be in alot of trouble...if every Muslim woman went to work we'd like wise be in so much trouble... If you wish to stay at home it should be on your own volition and not because some chum gave you a dirty look... sad thing is I believe his patronizing stares are rather a reflection on him than you..

I wish you the very best whatever you decide to do insha'Allah
May Allah love you and may everyone on your path henceforth be kind to you..

:w:
 
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:sl:

Well, my situation is quite the reverse. I'm neither from the Arab nor the Western society. My family had no objection to my going for further studies, they even encouraged me when I was offered the scholarship. But the reason I had to drop the Ph.D. is more related to administration/supervisor/university problems and most importantly, I started this process of questioning myself whether it is worthy; I mean specially in the case if I decide to stop working. So I have no regret...though I faced no constraints from my surrounding. Reluctancy was from my side.

I just hope though that you accept fate as it is but I can try to understand your situation, while it's the reverse here: no prohibition for girls to pursue their studies. Now I'm wondering whether I should be happy to have been blessed with such 'freedom'.:?

Ameen for your Du'aas. Insha Allah we can discuss later on.
 
:salamext:

Subhaan Allaah, I think there should be a limit to freedom. I wouldn't like my child to go to a university where I know they will be interacting with the Opposite Gender.
 
:sl:
yeah me too! which makes me wonder, if you have a child (even if they have reached the age of 'responsibility') are you allowed to send them to a school where you know they would be exposed to this stuff, as well as no prayer place :?
:sl:
 
:salamext:

They are YOUR responsibility. So YOU have to try your best to see to it that they are not involved in freemixing, e.g. send them to a single sex school.

OT: Men should work and earn the living Inshaa Allaah.
 
Yeah, I agree with the issue of free-mixing. That's why I started this thread anyway. But from where I am, we don't have any university that is for one gender only (my point was whether I should be glad at least to have gained access to knowledge). Hopefully, my studies were mostly research so I worked most of the time alone. And alhamdulillaah prayer was not a problem for me, there were facilities for it.
 
Ok thanks Sis.

Since we are talking about inter-mingling, is participating in a forum like this not in fact a virtual form of it, even if there is no word being uttered, no gaze raised?

Just a question which I have been asking myself several times before....
 
:salamext:

I'm not sure sis. I think it is less dangerous on the forum, as there are lots of people around and they can see what you are typing to the opposite gender, get me. Whereas if you were alone with a guy in real life, it would be more 'wrong'.

I'm not saying it's right, but I'm not saying it's wrong either lol.
 
Muj4h1d4 said:
:salamext:

I'm not sure sis. I think it is less dangerous on the forum, as there are lots of people around and they can see what you are typing to the opposite gender, get me. Whereas if you were alone with a guy in real life, it would be more 'wrong'.

I'm not saying it's right, but I'm not saying it's wrong either lol.
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I know a lot of people who have had a serious relationship online, even though they weren't together, alone. they could have met online and then decided to talk privately... you never know...

anyway, even in real day to day life i find that the brothers are very disrespectful towards us sisters while trying to "keep a distance". they are okay with intermingling with girls in their labs or tutorials, but they aren't okay with giving us a smal "selamualykum sistah"...
 

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