Little bro's friend just died after fight, how should he be comforted?

[AntiKarateKid]

Ok so... for some reason I feel more awkward reaching out to my siblings than my friends.

My bro's friend, Abdul Sharif, was playing soccer in Prospect Park when some guys showed up and started a fight. After some struggle the guys left and Abdul Sharif and friends stayed there and continued their game.


The guys came back and at one point heavily pounded Sharif's chest. The poor kid had a heart condition and after the fight he started feeling chest pains.


He started running toward the nearest hospital to get help but sadly passed away before he made it.



The incident leaves me fuming at the thugs who killed him but reaching out to my bro feels strangely awkward whereas my friends regard me as warm and caring. What should I tell myself and him?

 

[Dawud_uk]

Ok so... for some reason I feel more awkward reaching out to my siblings than my friends.

My bro's friend, Abdul Sharif, was playing soccer in Prospect Park when some guys showed up and started a fight. After some struggle the guys left and Abdul Sharif and friends stayed there and continued their game.


The guys came back and at one point heavily pounded Sharif's chest. The poor kid had a heart condition and after the fight he started feeling chest pains.


He started running toward the nearest hospital to get help but sadly passed away before he made it.



The incident leaves me fuming at the thugs who killed him but reaching out to my bro feels strangely awkward whereas my friends regard me as warm and caring. What should I tell myself and him?

why did they attack them?

 

[aamirsaab]

...
The incident leaves me fuming at the thugs who killed him but reaching out to my bro feels strangely awkward whereas my friends regard me as warm and caring. What should I tell myself and him?

You find it easier to reach out to your friends because you are used to being around them when they are in trouble or whatnot (you know how to deal with it because you have had more experience) - but I doubt you've had nearly that much experience with your brother (like most people) because he's hardly ever been in such situations (so you've not had the experience of helping him throughout).

It's not uncommon to feel such way and is part of our invincibility complex (where basically we think we are invincible until someone dies or gets hurt really bad [heart attack etc] - it shocks us back into reality and makes us realise we are not invincible at all. When that happens to someone close, we just don't know how to deal with it; we don't have the experience or knowlege)

Comfort your brother when you can but don't force it on him (don't go hugging him every 10 seconds, he's trying to get through it too). Ask him how he is feeling and if he does anything silly, then don't be too harsh on him (i.e use kiddy gloves for a while).

My condolonces to all those who have suffered as a result of this incident. May Allah make it easy for you all.

 

[AntiKarateKid]

why did they attack them?

The area the park is in... isnt exactly the safest place to be. The place is known to be more dangerous because of a higher rate of crime and I guess these guys who attacked were just fools looking to make trouble.

 

[Ansariyah]

Ina lilahi wa ina ileyhi raja3uun.

Be there for ur bro..he needs u~!..Tell him comforting words, maybe sharing wit him some hadeeth ayahs about death might help.

 

[جوري]

The best advise then after consolation from Allah swt.. is to stay out of troubled areas, else you'll be doomed to lose more people.
Surely there are activities in safer areas? try joining the YMMA is there is such a thing or band together to get one instated.

and Allah swt knows best

this is really terrible to read.. sob7an Allah.. I hope at least some justice will be implemented for the young man who was senselessly lost!

 

[miss red]

You find it easier to reach out to your friends because you are used to being around them when they are in trouble or whatnot (you know how to deal with it because you have had more experience) - but I doubt you've had nearly that much experience with your brother (like most people) because he's hardly ever been in such situations (so you've not had the experience of helping him throughout).

It's not uncommon to feel such way and is part of our invincibility complex (where basically we think we are invincible until someone dies or gets hurt really bad [heart attack etc] - it shocks us back into reality and makes us realise we are not invincible at all. When that happens to someone close, we just don't know how to deal with it; we don't have the experience or knowlege)



touched by you'r words