Lonely

AnonymousPoster

AnonymousPoster

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I don't want to be alone anymore.

I have lost every single one of my friends. My father has disowned me. I just recently began talking with a really, really good friend that I missed a lot after months without seeing them, but they never said they missed me and aren't very responsive to anything I say. They've been very happy though... :hmm: They just don't care to catch up. It's like we don't even know each other anymore.

I am an atheist. I am not seeking a religious answer to my problem, but this is the only place to which I can turn. There is absolutely no one else. I know no one in my city and I am broke.

I just feel horrible. I have social issues where I cannot speak well with others, even relatives. I stutter and cannot word my sentences.

Is this karma?
 
are you a former Muslim? why has your father disowned you?
I think I'd initiate relationship with my father first even if you are an atheist since having ties with your family is far more important than anything else. friends come and go but if you lose your family then what is left and if something untoward should happen to your dad you'll be filled with regrets and desire for do overs, trust me I have been there where you lose someone and the only thing that echoes in your mind are your un-resolute feelings, and it will torture you!
try to see if you can get speech therapy through some funded program, find some work you like even if it is baby sitting or tutoring or whatever you are good at, try to utilize your talent to make some little money, I believe once you work you'll be due to a different set of friends who will grow with you.. sometimes you grow apart from old friends and that is fine, it doesn't mean anyone is at fault, it means just that, you've grown apart..

all the best!
 
Dear friend,

I don't know if your situation is karma. what is karma? I don't know what it is.

Sorry to hear of your situation. May God make it better. Give you good new friends.

For your stuttering problem, can you get medical help?

Friend, who needs ppl when you got God? Everything might go wrong, everyone might leave us, but when you've got God then you've got everything. These are my personal feelings & I'm not preaching. When you've got God then there's something to hold on to even when everything seems dark.

It's strange, but when all hope's lost, i can't help but smile, knowing deep down God is there to fix everything, that everything's happening because God wanted it and it is for the best. That the world isn't out of control, God is controlling everything and in the end everything will be fine.

If not, we still have the afterlife for which to struggle for, so the world doesn't matter. In the end, what matters is our relationship with God and what we will get in the afterlife.

lol to tell you the truth, i'm quite happy on my own and like to spend loads of time alone. Not that I don't need friends; everyone does. but I like my alone time just as much.

So if everyone left me, I would still struggle for the afterlife. I would pray and read the Quran. There's no consolation like the tranquil feeling you get when reading the Quran. I hope you give it a try. Try listening to it's recitation. There's nothing in the world like it. You can find audio Quran recitation online.

Hope everything gets better.
 
^^ I loved your advise.. incredible words to live by.. sob7an Allah, and it applies to all of us..

this is one of my favorite sura, and I believe it is a divine consolation of Allah swt to all the lonely:

[MEDIA]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=My3PVW0gHj0[/MEDIA]

IT IS SAID that after surah 89 (Al-Fajr) was revealed, some time elapsed during which the Prophet did not receive any revelation, and that his opponents in Mecca taunted him on this score, saying, "Thy God has forsaken and scorned thee!" - whereupon the present surah was revealed. Whether or not we accept this somewhat doubtful story, there is every reason to assume that the surah as such, although in the first instance addressed to the Prophet, has a far wider purport: it concerns - and is meant to console - every faithful man and woman suffering from the sorrows and bitter hardships which so often afflict the good and the innocent, and which sometimes cause even the righteous to question God's transcendental justice.​

IN THE NAME OF GOD, THE MOST GRACIOUS, THE DISPENSER OF GRACE:​

1) CONSIDER the bright morning hours,

(2) and the night when it grows still and dark.*

* The expression "bright morning hours" apparently symbolizes the few and widely-spaced periods of happiness in human life, as contrasted with the much greater length of "the night when it grows still and dark", i.e., the extended periods of sorrow or suffering that, as a rule, overshadow man's existence in this world (cf. 90 : 4). The further implication is that, as sure as morning follows night, God's mercy is bound to lighten every suffering, either in this world or in the life to come - for God has "willed upon Himself the law of grace and mercy" (6:12 and 54).

(3) Thy Sustainer has not forsaken thee, nor does He scorn thee:*

*Sc., ''as the thoughtless might conclude in view of the suffering that He has willed thee to bear".

(4) for, indeed, the life to come will be better for thee than this earlier part [of thy life]!

(5) And, indeed, in time will thy Sustainer grant thee [what thy heart desires], and thou shalt be well-pleased.

(6) Has He not found thee an orphan, and given thee shelter?*

*Possibly an allusion to the fact that Muhammad was born a few months after his father's death, and that his mother died when he was only six years old. Apart from this, however, every human being is an "orphan" in one sense or another, inasmuch as everyone is "created in a lonely state" (cf. 6:94), and "will appear before Him on Resurrection Day in a lonely state" (19:95).

(7) And found thee lost on thy way, and guided thee?

(8) And found thee in want, and given thee sufficiency?

(9) Therefore, the orphan shalt thou never wrong,

(10) and him that seeks [thy] help shalt thou never chide,*

*The term sa'il denotes" literally, "one who asks", which signifies not only a "beggar" but anyone who asks for help in a difficult situation, whether physical or moral, or even for enlightenment.

(11) and of thy Sustainer's blessings shalt thou [ever] speak.*

*Sc., "rather than of thy suffering".
​
 
^Thank you sister, you give great advice as well! Surah Duha is also one of my favorite surahs.
 
this
​
is a growing problem with people who don't have faith in anything and people with little faith in anything have no guilt of pushing people away especially their parents who cared for you when you were little. you can never repay your parents for what they did for you. try to look inside of yourself it might be something which you are doing wrong and try to change. make up with your dad and don't leave it to long this is the only mature advice i can give you now. there will be a day that will come that you will feel alot of guilt and thats when it will be to late to make a mends
 
AnonymousGender said:
I don't want to be alone anymore.

I have lost every single one of my friends. My father has disowned me. I just recently began talking with a really, really good friend that I missed a lot after months without seeing them, but they never said they missed me and aren't very responsive to anything I say. They've been very happy though... :hmm: They just don't care to catch up. It's like we don't even know each other anymore.

I am an atheist. I am not seeking a religious answer to my problem, but this is the only place to which I can turn. There is absolutely no one else. I know no one in my city and I am broke.

I just feel horrible. I have social issues where I cannot speak well with others, even relatives. I stutter and cannot word my sentences.

Is this karma?
Click to expand...

In the Name of Allah .

Dear AnonymousgGender , I am very touched about your situation . That remembers when I became muslim and saw my relative cold shoulder on me .

My father also disowned me but I tooke comfort with my new friends and brothers in Islam .

But you are alone and you lose hope , thinking you have a bad "karma" .
I don't believe in karma but I believe in Allah Who is The Master of destiny , so I can ask to Him to change evil in good and take me a better life .

You say " I am an atheist " . I don't think so , I think you try to find the truth and it is no accident that you are choising this forum . Whatever happens , we aren't alone and always Allah is looking to our actions .

Don't forget , the mind can perceive what the eyes cannot see .

Friendly .
 
sounds like you need God right now (well you need him always, but you realise the desperation now)


when the worlds got you on your knee's - its the best time to turn to God...
 
he disowned you because you disbelieved in Allah?
 
Answer to your problems is... Hope.

You have lost Hope... and the only one that can give you hope is Allah (God).


You may not want to hear a religious solution, but even scientifically/medically you will remain depressed unless you attain hope once again.
 
AnonymousGender said:
I don't want to be alone anymore.

I have lost every single one of my friends. My father has disowned me. I just recently began talking with a really, really good friend that I missed a lot after months without seeing them, but they never said they missed me and aren't very responsive to anything I say. They've been very happy though... :hmm: They just don't care to catch up. It's like we don't even know each other anymore.

I am an atheist. I am not seeking a religious answer to my problem, but this is the only place to which I can turn. There is absolutely no one else. I know no one in my city and I am broke.

I just feel horrible. I have social issues where I cannot speak well with others, even relatives. I stutter and cannot word my sentences.

Is this karma?
Click to expand...

Hiya!

Sorry to hear what you are going through though I find it slightly odd that your asking advice from an Islamic forum when your an atheist. The odd thing is when the whole world turns against you...you have no one to turn to but God.

Well I think you need to move on and find some new friends. You will feel a lot better. Find some hobbies to do and keep active. You will feel much better if you find something to do.

I think you need to talk with your dad. It is still very important to keep in contact with your family. I'm certain your dad still cares for you, he is just probably upset. Parents are like that. =/

I'm a little worried about your financial situation. How do you support yourself?

You need some support to help you feel comfortable in social situations. You are not alone. Many people have difficulty developing social skills. You can see a professional counsellor, doctor or a psychologist to help you.
 
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stay strong in these difficult times and pray that your situation will improve inshAllah

there is no karma... only the will of Allah
 
I have never been a muslim. My father disowned me and my brother to start a new life with someone else. He has moved and cut off all contact with his family. No one has seen him in years.

I loved the suggestions of getting a cat or a dog. I have a cat. :D But, I need human contact too.

I recently started university and still don't know people very well. I am working here, for the person concerned about that. I will make around $500 a month.

As much as I understand and appreciate the suggestions to turn to Allah, with my current beliefs—it's impossible for me to convert.

I've nestled myself in with books and studying to distract myself from the pressure of making friends. +o(

Isn't that opposite from the normal person? :hmm:

I feel like it will suddenly change soon. I don't know why. A lot of things are changing, not socially just yet, but educationally, financially, and I am being exposed to more and more very quickly.

I will see how this year turns out for me. And, if Allah is directing it, please have mercy. Even though I don't believe, I don't disbelieve. I can be wrong because I am a human.

I have been reflecting, reading, and writing in my free time at the university library. It's some nice scenery surrounded with trees changing from green to yellows and reds as Autumn arrives. A bird just ran into the window. ;D

Thanks a lot. I appreciate it and I liked reading the selfless responses that were given! :statisfie
 
Hi Anonymous,

It's a pleasure to see you smiling :) Lol, I hope that bird didn't get too hurt inshaAllah (God willing). If you have a little bit of time on your hands, why not go along to a charity shop and offer to do a little voluntary work for them? Or even run errands for an elderly/sick person in your neighbourhood? You will get human company and also a good feeling that stems from helping others. I'm sure you will really enjoy it once you start.

All the best :)
 
AnonymousGender said:
I don't want to be alone anymore.

I have lost every single one of my friends. My father has disowned me. I just recently began talking with a really, really good friend that I missed a lot after months without seeing them, but they never said they missed me and aren't very responsive to anything I say. They've been very happy though... :hmm: They just don't care to catch up. It's like we don't even know each other anymore.

I am an atheist. I am not seeking a religious answer to my problem, but this is the only place to which I can turn. There is absolutely no one else. I know no one in my city and I am broke.

I just feel horrible. I have social issues where I cannot speak well with others, even relatives. I stutter and cannot word my sentences.

Is this karma?
Click to expand...

hey,
sorry to hear this.. the advise given so far is good, i hope God makes it easy for you.
i kindof know what its like not to be too close with your mates, i had a few issues Myself with my mates and the last couple of months were difficult. but dont worry, if ur friends dont care, it dont matter because theres plenty of other people to get to know, University is full of new people and u will find others to share ur interests.

Sort whatever it is with ur father, just do ur best and have Faith!! I give this advice to myself b4 u, coz theres times when ive lost hope and had no confidence. But i will tell u something, when u have a faith in a being greater than u, he takes care of u and hopefully u will feel secure. You just got to have faith and Hope. Everfins going to be ok.

Take care and enjoy University,its a great place to meet new people and start fresh! :D.
 
You can always join a sports club or something, in particular one where you meet other people and play a sport on regular evenings. So I don't mean a fitness club or anything like that.
 
:sl:
As much as I understand and appreciate the suggestions to turn to Allah, with my current beliefs—it's impossible for me to convert.
Click to expand...
you dont have to convert to turn to allah...non-muslim's ask for god's help all the time :shade:
 

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