love?, shai'taan?

[Muhaba]

Well, he did say in his post that he tried to talk to her parents. he wrote:

i told her let me talk to her parents, also long ago. but her parents refused to talk to me. She says, they wont give me a chance so his dad is being "unislamic".

i'm not saying that he should marry her. just tactfully get out of the situation. Since her parents are never going to accept, he won't have to marry her or anything.

I think that telling her he doesn't like her is the wrong thing to do at this time. but telling her that if she leaves home he will not like her will keep her from leaving home. and she won't be so hurt that she will do something stupid.

If she continues to email him, his first response should be "i will only respond if your parents talk to me" and then after a while stop replying altogether.

Also, if he didn't like her or was unsure of his feelings, he shouldn't have talked to her in the first place. But he let things go this far and even said haraam things. Since he let things go this far, he has the responsibility to get out of it tactfully. Just saying, "I don't like you, I never liked you, etc etc" is not the right thing to do.

 

[Ummu Sufyaan]

Since her parents are never going to accept, he won't have to marry her or anything.

that's not the point tho sis. the brother should stay away from her altogether. its these lil traps that end up getting people sucked into something they cant get out of. she's not his responsibility, full stop.

everyone feels like dying when they lose a loved one but they get past it. it's life.

stay away from her brother, she isn't your responsibility. no matter what things she comes up with, just ignore it--->the more you listen, the harder it will be to stop.

 

[Nσσя'υℓ Jαииαн]

Man....what a sticky situation!

 

[Muhaba]

it was a mistake to get into this from the start. ppl should think before they do this kind of thing. guys especially, because i think girls most of the time think it's serious stuff and the guy will marry her etc. so guys should remember that. Girls should remember that the guy is just flirting and isn't serious about anything. Not only is it haraam but will be a huge heartache and headache later on.

 

[celina]

it was a mistake to get into this from the start. ppl should think before they do this kind of thing. guys especially, because i think girls most of the time think it's serious stuff and the guy will marry her etc. so guys should remember that. Girls should remember that the guy is just flirting and isn't serious about anything. Not only is it haraam but will be a huge heartache and headache later on.

That is so true, guys should understand that some women get attached quickly they are emotional.

 

[anonymous]

Alhamdulilah, apparently I dont know what happened. but she asked me not to contact her nor her friends and realised her mistake and everything! but it seems like it wasnt her email, someone else.


but i feel sad...i dont know about what , the loss of her? or the sin we committed? i dont know anything . i feel really sad and loss of faith right now. !!

 

[anonymous]

that's not the point tho sis. the brother should stay away from her altogether. its these lil traps that end up getting people sucked into something they cant get out of. she's not his responsibility, full stop.

everyone feels like dying when they lose a loved one but they get past it. it's life.

stay away from her brother, she isn't your responsibility. no matter what things she comes up with, just ignore it--->the more you listen, the harder it will be to stop.

thank you sister!! your advise and the alpha brothers advise were the best! and I made dua to Allah swt to help me, and alhamdulilah it did. but Why do I feel sad? I want to cry, is it because i lost her? or the sin we committed?

I don't even feel like praying or anything. I dont even know if i loved her or anything! i dont know anything!! !

 

[Ummu Sufyaan]

just solider on and be patient. do what you have to do and try as best to ignore your pain by keeping yourself busy, becuase that way inshallah you wont feel the hurt which means you wont feel helpless.