Mum & Fight arguments

[AnonymousPoster]

i really need help

my mum n dad always have arguments like every 2-6 months,
im 19 nw, i remeber when i was in primary skool, i remeber my mum n dad having arguments, like my dad accused my mum of luking & flirting wiv ova men when she didnt

lik 2day they had an argument ova summing stupid, lik my mum needed dad 2 help her wiv somthin n he kept sayin hell do it hell do it n he nva, then i helped her i said 2 my dad help mum, and walked off, then he came and started arguing wiv my mum,

i jumped in n said why u like this?
now
his accusing my mum of brain washing me 2 go on her side

seriouslly ppl i hate my dad, he really makes me hacked off, especally cuz wt he does 2 my mum

my mum is downstairs crying nw

i went downstairs n carried on the work she needed help wiv, then she said u jus made things work i said so who does he fink he is, my mum said his ur dad, i said no his nt, mum said u stupid boy get out the house

nw shes crying

i fink its all my falut

but wt my dad needs 2 understand if his dad swtiched at his mum this way he would feel so upset, im crying right nw cuz my mum is so hurt my mum is like my dimond when any1 does anyfink it really gives me alot of pain

wt shall i do ?

 

[S_87]

your parents arguing are something only they can change and stop. what you have to remember is at the end of the day, your father is your father and you must honour and respect him

And your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him. And that you be dutiful to your parents
17:23

Worship Allah and join none with Him (in worship); and do good to parents
4:36

have you tried talking to your father?

 

[AnonymousPoster]

Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullaah

listen bro these things happen, my dad use to argue with my mum like that too and when i use to jump in my mum use to get angry at me.

You need to carefully think how your actions towards one person is gonna affect another.

So next time just quietly try to calm down your dad and comfort your mum.


i went through life that way till my dads last days, and my dad slowly started being more nicer to everyone.

patience and prayer is the key, when things get hard turn to Allah.


Assalamu Alaikum

 

[AnonymousPoster]

i should also probably mention that my mum loved my dad dearly, and my dad likewise loved my mum.

love is something you cant understand, but just because a couple fight and argue does not nullify that love.


You just help maintain the peace, dont stress just rely on Allah


Assalamu ALaikum

 

[Re.TiReD]

AssalamuAlaykum

SubhanAllah at brother above, I get a feeling I know who you is masha'Allah...

Ookay anyway...Bro original anon poster, its important to realise that each and every relationship will have its ups and downs, it comes with the territory...problem is that no matter how many times we convince ourselves of that fact, it'll never make the problems easier to deal with...

To be quite honest I'm a 'walk out the room at the first sign of tension' kind of person, but you seem quite the opposite masha'Allah...Brother I think you need to talk to your father, tell him how you feel, I've said this loads of times and I'm going to say it again....most often than not, the simplest way to resolve an issue or problem is to talk it through, firstly because people cannot guess how you're feeling, you're going to have to tell them, and secondly because when people are in the wrong, they tend not to realise it.

Thats all the advice I can give you, sorry. All the best Akhee.

WassalamuAlaykum

 

[bint_muhammed]

asalamulaikum akhi. sometimes there is a problem between parents that the kids dont understand. im not saying your mum is brainwashing you or anything but sometimes the way mums act makes you feel sorry for them more than the dad and you take their side ( not that you have to take sides). this can frustrate fathers more, especially when you may be ignorant of the situation. i may not be much of help becuaes i only had a father up the age of 12 but all i can say may allah swt help your situation and bring peace within your house. dnt be harsh on your father because he is still a parent and you have to always respect and love them!

 

[AnonymousPoster]

wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu

No couple is perfect and they are bound to have these arguments.
As some one who has been in similiar situations bro, just trust me when I say that there is know man who cared for my Mother more then my father and there no man has cared for me like my father did... so try to unite your family, love and respect both your parents. At times my Mother would rebuke because my little outbursts wouldn't really help her and it makes things worse. I can't explain why my Father would do what he did at times but I was wrong to doubt his love and care for my Mother and family. For your own good bro, do not act against your Father.

The loss of either parents is a devastating thing...

 

[noorahmad]

assalam walaikum
acting badly to either parent is one of the greatest sin of islam and all you can is to ask Allah all mighty du'aa that he helps both of your parens

 

[anonymous]

Assalamu Alaikum wa Rahmatullaah

listen bro these things happen, my dad use to argue with my mum like that too and when i use to jump in my mum use to get angry at me.

You need to carefully think how your actions towards one person is gonna affect another.

So next time just quietly try to calm down your dad and comfort your mum.


i went through life that way till my dads last days, and my dad slowly started being more nicer to everyone.

patience and prayer is the key, when things get hard turn to Allah.

Assalamu Alaikum

i am in amazement at how your mum still stood by your dad even though he still argued with her. that is really amazing. to turn around and still consider thier feelings is wow!...what a women!!!

yeah, my parents argued alot. my mum use to cop it phsically from my dad. i dont hate my dad, but my love and respect for him is most def deficient. i wonder if my parents ever loved each other. hmmm....maybe, 'cos i remeber my mum being really upset and jealous that my dad might have gotten her a co-wife lol hmmmm.....

AssalamuAlaykum

SubhanAllah at brother above, I get a feeling I know who you is masha'Allah...

yeah same :sunny:

 

[AnonymousPoster]

they probably do love each other which is the case with most married couples !

the only thing which divides them is turning mountains into mole hills, and the best mothers/fathers/husbands/wives know better.

Yeah my mums one in a million, i havent met a more patient wife yet.


May Allah grant her jannah and unite her wiv dad in paradise because she really did love him greatly, and he loved her, this became most evident during my dads last two weeks in dunya.


bro you'll see it one day, help them both be patient and loving, your the son right, your supposed to be the coolness of their eyes lol, go cool them


Assalamu AlaIkum wa RahmAtullahi wa Barakatuh

 

[Ebtisweetsam]

Sometimes what they are fighting about has nothing at all to do with the real issue; this is why it is best not to take sides because your mother may have done something earlier that day to tick him off.
Most of us tend to take one side or the other, but when you get married and you are doing the parenting yourself, you tend to see the other side of things.
When i was at my mum's, i always used to take my dad's side because i felt he was the kind soft-hearted one.
Now, i can see where my mum was coming from; having all the responsibility and dad used to hardly help her. Every parent has their side of the story. Parents really take it to heart when they feel their child is preferring one parent over the other. eace:

 

[AnonymousPoster]

yeah, my parents argued alot. my mum use to cop it phsically from my dad. i dont hate my dad, but my love and respect for him is most def

yeah same :sunny:

jazaa kalah

who do you fink i am btw? give me the first letter of my user name

kazaa kalah

jazaa kalah for every1 who helped situation is much better now my dad has calmed down

 

[anonymous]

who do you fink i am btw? give me the first letter of my user name

lol, nah me wasnt refering to you, i were refering to this poster

i should also probably mention that my mum loved my dad dearly, and my dad likewise loved my mum.

love is something you cant understand, but just because a couple fight and argue does not nullify that love.


You just help maintain the peace, dont stress just rely on Allah


Assalamu ALaikum

 

[rabarbara2008]

i am sorry to hear that you feel sad brother. as already said, many married people fight from time to time. it's part of life. i would advise you not to pick a side, but to talk to them openly about being bothered by the shouting etc. after that, your job is done. the problem is between them and only they can solve it.

 

[anonymous]

mashallah same story here brother...

sum good replies

p.s. since this account dont have tech support thing ima say it here
how com when i register or do the 'contact us' email thing i cant see the letters in the registration image only the background, please help...sorry its off topic