Muslim married to a non-muslim.

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ShoebA

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Hello everyone,

Please do not flame me for asking these questions as love is truly blind.
First let me talk about myself.

Work and lack of a muslim social circle due to my ambitions have led me away from my Muslim commitments. I haven't done a Jummah prayer in sometime. I try real hard to get to Eid prayers. (Although if I don't make it, then I do it at home). Deep down, I believe in being a Muslim and I love my attachment to our religion and Allah. So I have that fear of not fulfilling my duties as a Muslim. I am really looking forward to Ramadan as well. I am 26.

My wife:
She is a European woman with good humane values. When she was young, he family converted to Mormonism. However, she is like me where she feels the love for her religion but isn't practicing. She is also young, 20.5 years old.

Naturally, I love my religion and want her to convert to mine so our kids become muslims and we can have good Ramadan moments as a family amongst other Islamic events. I feel this is the right time for me to try and convince her to convert to Islam since she's young and she's not practicing.

However, I am taking it slow so as to not make her become defensive. We were walking by an Islamic person one day who had brochures, and she took them, even read them once or twice. She also told me that Islam and Mormonism is similar in most ways. I make her say Bismillah when she's done praying before we have our meals.

Even though this looks slow and steady, I want to hurry up before we have kids (we're planning to have kids in the next 4-5 years) and also have her practice.

Just this morning, she mentioned to me that the best way would be that I learn about her religion and she learn about mine and then we try to figure this out.
I need your help. I need your advice and suggestions on how I go about this.

Thank you very much, and Ramadan mubarak!
 
Planning someones conversion within a time limit, doesn't seem like the best of ideas. Infact, could end up pushing her away from yours - or just her trying to push you to hers.
 
Planning someones conversion within a time limit, doesn't seem like the best of ideas. Infact, could end up pushing her away from yours - or just her trying to push you to hers.

I do not have a timelimit.
I just need help in trying to do this.
 
Hello everyone,

Please do not flame me for asking these questions as love is truly blind.
First let me talk about myself.

Work and lack of a muslim social circle due to my ambitions have led me away from my Muslim commitments. I haven't done a Jummah prayer in sometime. I try real hard to get to Eid prayers. (Although if I don't make it, then I do it at home).

You should really try to make it to jummah prayers, it is more important than eid prayers.

As for your wife, why don't you try and lead by example? Try and live by islaam as best you can. Pray your 5 daily prayers, fast, pay your zakat etc. and insha Allaah she will see the improvement in you and your character and want to learn more?

Du'a is also very important, for there is no guidance without Allaah azawajal's Guidance.
 
The status of your wife is not as important as yours. You yourself admit to not being a practicing muslim. As someone mentioned above, lead by example. You have already got yourself into a path of destruction in my opinion. Your lifestyle is primarily influenced by your environment. It is very difficult even for a very strong minded person to go against the prevailing norms. I assume you live in the west because only in such an environment, does a situation like yours develop. Thus under Islamic law, it is not permissible for a Muslim to permanently reside in a non Muslim country or place. Even limited incursions are heavily regulated by need alone. IN such an environment it is very difficult to lead an islamic lifestyle. Thus, if you are serious towards Islam, you would consider moving to an Islamic environment. I personally know of a a middle eastern man who had a married a christian woman and he brought her over to the middle east. After a few years the woman herself converted to Islam. These points that I have mentioned can be backed up by statistical studies.

With regards to the ruling that marriage to a christian woman is allowed. On posing my question to Dr. Bilal Phillips (a renouned scholar), he replied that it is not advisable but merely allowed under certain conditions. Those conditions mostly do not imply to the christians we see today. For more details contact a scholar, I can look it up if you so please.

In the meanwhile, you should read the Quran in the language you understand and read some basic books on 'aqeedah' (the conditions for one to actually become a muslim in the eyes of the Lord).
 
leading b example is the best way to go about it. If your wife sees you practicing it might spark an interest in her which may lead to her conversion.

You have to do a better job in attending jummah prayer and eid prayers. Jummah prayers are a must so dont try to miss them. Also during jummah you will be amongst other brothers who should make you feel great about your faith.
 
Lead by example is the best advice given, as I totally agree. I can't try to help someone change into my religion if I myself am not doing it well.

Thanks a lot for your advice guys.
 

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