my dads died.... what can i do?

My grandmother who always used to live with us died last year also my brother in law died

May allah give u strong iman and shall he make u among the saliheen
 
How dare your mother treat you like that, hes your father you have every right to be at the the funeral, what is she gonna do fight u out? This makes me sick that a mother can treat her child so badly.
 
lilly_rose said:
:sl:
Hello sister and brothers of Islam I am so depressed it is like my hole world has went down my father has died last Wednesday I was on holiday than the news has come and we had to fly back quickly.:cry: :cry:

my mothers gone mad blaming be for my dads death my hole family are against me saying things because am a Muslim and this would not have happened if it wasn’t for me. Am so depressed and I went to kill my self I :hiding: went into a shelter home yesterday with my baby it is like this black hole in my life but what keeps me going is my baby and my legs am lost am going mental my dads funeral no one wanted me there I don’t know what to do . i feel sick the verry time +o( i cry verry day that he was alife and thigs to get better :cry:

This is my worst year. I keep reading the Qur’an I feel like leaving Islam is the only option open for me. I can’t live a life without my dad he was normal nothing wrong with him he just died naturally. I now you cant leave Islam once you are one but what can I do . :cry:


he was the best i sometimes wish he was a muslim:cry: :'( what can i do whent to kill my self i feel lost:cry:
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am so sorry to hear that sis my mam has died too and i don't even know whom me dad is am so so sorry to hear that i know how you feel :'(

don't worry he is in God's hand thats all i can say is pray for him and i know saying is easy i am still in a situation like you are still miss me mam and dad when we all as a family had a wonderful time but now look, one day we are all going to leave our soul behind so just pray for him sis and i hope God makes your life easier and gives your family patience (amin)

take care and take it easy :uhwhat
 
Mazed, that's a beautiful picture, but it's lenght is kind of screwing up this thread making it quite challenging to read it :p

Sister Lilly
Please be patient. I know it's hard. I've lost my father to a couple years ago. I know, it's devastating. I wish I could give you some advice, on what to do. But there's not really a lot you can do. This is just one of the facts of life that we need to accept. Just make dua for him, that is the best gift you can give him. Remember that death is just a veil, to make the master plan less obvious for those who are left behind. So pray that your father might be granted jannah, and inshallah you'll see eachother again there. And now it might sem like far away, but once your there (inshallah) it will seem like you have been apart but for a second. Remember how blessed you are with the guidance and knowledge Allah has given you. While he leads others astray, he led you to the path of guidance. Why? Because it was known that you would apreciate that guidance, and accept it. Because it was known that you would be thankfull towards it. you can't comit suicide. Even if you'd want to, it's not an option. You have to accept the path that Allah has laid out for you and finish the rest of the exam. Why would you exchange the hardships of this world for etenral hardship? Remind yourself of the moment you first took your shahada. Remember how it felt? I still remmeber it like it was yesterday. Be patient. you are among the blessed ones. Allah will not forsake you inshallah. Pray and make dua. Inshallah you will be answered.

May Allah guide you through your hardships and keep you on the straight path; and may he grant your father jannah inshallah.

As for the pain that insists...
People will tell you time will heal it. I'm gonna be honest with you. They are wrong. Time will not heal the wound. My father passed away, and it still hurts. And some people might think I should be over it by now. But you know what I 've come to realise? That it's actually a good thing! I wouldn't want to forget my father. He will inshallah always stay close to my heart. And that means it will always hurt that we are seperated. so no matter how much ime passes by, it still hurts. What time does do, is make it easyer to bare that pain. The more you come to accept the way it is, the more you come to understand why things happened in the way they did, the more bearable the pain will become inshallah. I know that that might not be a lot help to you right now, but this is the best I can do. May Allah make your pain more bearable inshallah.
 
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Sis, why are they blaming u for his death? u obviously didnt kill him so why are they blaming u?

Allah swt only tests those whom he loves n he obviously loves u loads, just be patienct as Allah swt is with those who are patient.

Also sis, what shelter are u living in? where are u from, inshallah we can sort some accomodation out for u.
 
this is one of the saddest threads i've seen.
i can tell you nothing.
at least it is good that you have a child to live for - this will pull you through.
i will remember you in my prayers (i'm doing a bit more of that these days, anyway).
may god help you to heal from this awful pain.
 
ohh sister, please understand that this is a trial from Allah swt, remmeber the life of this world will pass quickly but the hereafter will last forever. i know it is really hard for you, i have had a similar experiance, i know you have what it takes to be a good muslimah submmiting to Allah swt. inshallah you do well.
 
Asalamu Alaikum Sis,

This is a very difficult situation indeed... May Allah grant you patience, Inshallah.

Losing a loved one is never easy...

I would like to say one thing...

Love Allah, the One who gave you a father in the first place... Alhumdulillah, you had a father. Love your Lord, who created you and everything you've come to known... The love for Allah is the only remedy that you have right now... Love HIM more than anything else....

There are so many people in the world, that don't even have families or food, and are spending their lives in the streets.

Know that your greatest and true love will never die, HE is forever living, your creater, Allah.

May Allah grant you peace, Inshallah.

W'salaamz,
Hamid
 
Salam Lilly sis,

Just wondering how you are? Hope you're feeling a lil stronger inshaAllah. Please do let us know. Thinking of you. :)
 
great to hear sis mashalah, inshalah it works out smoothly inshalah

our duas with you! all the best,

take care salamz
 
Alpha Dude said:
Salam

Sis, I think your family members are having difficulty dealing with the death so they need someone to take the anger out on, unfortunately you're seen as the outsider. But like has been said before, just remember this world is a test, so make plenty of dua, insha'Allah you will be able to cope better as time progresses.
I'll make dua, Insha'Allah

Wasalam
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:sl:
well said bro
:w:
 
I don't know if anyone can understand death unless dealing with it first hand... I have lost my uncle, then my aunt a year of each other... then my best friend, then both my grandmothers within 3 months of each other... It has been a personal hell at best... I can't say I found solace in anything, prayers or fast or reading Quran, or writing poetry.. I wanted to lock myself up from the world and I did for quite sometime actually I didn't want people to comfort me because none of them knew how...any word or sentence would bring me to tears... I never told anyone about my friend who passed away and I never really had closure... to this day I think of a different ending or different things I could have said or done just to appease my soul... it is a depressing indescribable feeling... I was in complete state of anhedonia I suspect that is what you are feeling... I wish I can comfort you... I don't know if words will mean anything right now... just remember the affair of the Muslim is a wondrous thing... if he is hurt and is patient he is rewarded... if he is blessed and thankful he is rewarded.... sometimes it is a drag to get out of bed I know... you think well what is the point? what do I have to live for... but know that you matter to the one who created you... you matter to your new born baby...you matter to your friends and family... you matter to the new friends you have made on this forum and with all of it comes responsibility... just look into your baby's eyes and remember that you must stay strong... you are responsible for all those people and most importantly responsible for yourself... engage yourself with people who care for you... I know this probably means nothing to you right now but what your family is doing to you is expected adjustment disorder with persons who are unable to deal with stress or grieve look for an easy target to receive their lashing while they adjust might even go as far as blaming you for someone's death which is absurd... it isn't fair to you as he was your father, you converting doesn't make you love him any less than they do and you are allowed to grieve for him as much as they are... Many people look for an easy answer by drawing some satisfaction from simplistic conclusions... That isn't your problem but theirs.... Sister my advise is to seek some grief counseling with a Muslim psychiatrist who may be able to work with you to not only grieve but understand all these emotions that you are overcome with... and secondly to take it one day at a time... one hour at a time ... one minute at a time... Time is God's gift to heal those gaping wounds... if I can help you in any way shape or form please PM me...
 
lilly_rose said:
am doing fine;D ;D
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That's good! :happy:

How is your family? Have they worked through some of their grief and have they changed their attitude towards you?

And how are you coping without your dad?
 
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glo said:
That's good! :happy:

How is your family? Have they worked through some of their grief and have they changed their attitude towards you?

And how are you coping without your dad?
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well my mum and me are geting brother i love him he has been there for me sister ok. the rest of the family i really don't care anymore:uhwhat

my dad i pray for him and visit his grave though i miss him:cry:
 
salam.
hope your in good health Ukthi inshallah ;), if you need any help just drop us a line or two anytime inshallah
w.salam
 

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