Need Help With Life In General

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FreePalestine

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:sl: everyone, this might be a long post, but I really need someone to talk to and just to give me advice in general. If you could read this I would really appreciate it.

Right now I am 20 years old, just about to finish my 2nd year of university, and hopefully apply to medical school one day. However, here is the problem, I spent my whole university life just working, volunteering, etc, and I feel like I never enjoyed anything about it, and it makes me sick to my stomach. It makes me so sick it is to the point that I regret trying to pursue medicine altogether. It's so stressful that I have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety, which does nothing but make things worse. What makes it also worse, is that all these years spent working to just have a "chance" of becoming a doctor will be gone to waste if I don't get accepted. Also, if I do get accepted I'll be done at the age of 30, which I feel like I have wasted the best years of my life, where I could have started a family, enjoyed myself with friends, built better social relationships with people, but I was stuck trying to become a doctor. However, do not get me wrong, I would love to become a doctor, but the road to become one is exhausting, stressful, and mentally draining, and I am starting to think is it really worth it? I have a hard time keeping friends, let a lone making them, and this processes is not going to do anything but make it worse.

To be honest, I am not a very good Muslim. Deep down I strive to be, but for some reason it never reflects my actions or attitudes towards people or life in general. I keep telling myself tomorrow I will strive to be better, but it never works out. Sometimes I am not very nice to people, and I lose my temper. Which is obviously a very bad thing. I always have a strained relationship with my parents, sometimes we get a long, sometimes we do not. I get a long with my mother fine, but my dad sometimes is very complicated to deal with. He doesn't like going out and having "family" time together, and enjoy it with other families in our community. He would rather just sit at home and do nothing, and it honestly affects us as a family as a whole. We might go out like four times a year altogether and enjoy ourselves.

Honestly, I am so lost, and I have no clue what to do. Some days are so stressful I just sit there and do nothing, hoping things will go away, but I know they will not. I feel like the future is nothing but a grim reality, and that there is nothing I can do about it.

If anyone could really help me I would really appreciate it.:jz:

:w:
 
:wasalamex

However, do not get me wrong, I would love to become a doctor, but the road to become one is exhausting, stressful, and mentally draining, and I am starting to think is it really worth it?
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I think you must clarify your vision. If you are half-hearted and uncertain then you must re-evaluate what you want, to avoid wasting time and effort. On the other hand, if you feel a genuine passion for a medical career and understand exactly what it entails, this will pull you through those difficult times. Many paths are difficult but if we have full determination it makes those challenges easier and worth their while. I am sure you will :ia: be able to get married, enjoy yourself with friends and build social relationships whichever path you take. Sometimes we end up on strange and unexpected paths but we may also find happiness and aid from places we didn't expect. That is why you should clarify your goal and renew your intentions, place your trust in Allaah :swt: and He will guide you through your journey and take care of your affairs. Whatever will happen was decreed for you and will be good for you whether you realise it or not.

Regarding working hard and volunteering, this is something to be happy with, not depressed about. There are people who don't do any work and become drowned in 'having fun', and they are the ones who end up in a depressing state. It is a case of achieving a balance - working hard is vital, and having some time to relax and have halal fun is also important. If you think you are working too hard, re-organise your schedule and try to do some things that you will enjoy.

Try to change the things that are within your control and work on them step by step. You may find that when one or two things start improving, it has a knock-on effect on others :ia:. Increase in your remembrance of Allaah :swt: - this is vital for warding off stress and negativity. This is the believer's strength and nourishment. And of course, make as much du'a to Allaah :swt: as you can and ask Him to guide you.

May Allaah :swt: rectify the affairs of both of you, Aameen.
 
Don't beat yourself up. You are a good person because you can identify your flaws a fell remorse.Everyone has the day where they want to hide away from everything and everybody.everyone attempts being a better person,Muslim,father,son everyday and the task is not easy. As far as friends go find one or two that come whatever they will stand by you and call you friend. thats the best part of best friends you dont have speak everyday or hangout every week to be good friends you love them and they love you back. I wont lie say the stress of med school will ever go away or rather it turns into the new stress of being a doctor. that is up to your resolve.As for marriage and family those will come when they come but Im guessing you would want to be a proper husband be able to protect,support and provide for your family so take your time. Life will test your faith or else there would be no need for the Dunya so pray, pray when your in that dark place because Allah your rub is with you and make dua even if you think it may fall on def ears. find your happy place and get to it and then pray when you get there

O you who have believed, seek help through patience and prayer. Indeed, Allah is with the patient.
 

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