Before I start, I wanna say that I am fully aware that many of you will ridicule me for any reason in particular (maybe/maybe not), but if that’s the case, go for it I suppose. Nobody knows me here and I rarely post here, let alone do anything but since this is the advice section, I’ll let this thing slide. I’ll be however obliged if you took a few minutes or so to read all of this. xD
Anyway to summarize what I have to say, I was a total idiot. I got myself banned on another website and I lost my VIP privileges on its mainsite. In turn, I felt like I lost everything else. My friends on that website and pretty much the one thing that brought me there. Respect. I’ve practically been there for nearly seven years which I spent getting games featured, writing game reviews and moderating.
I even felt respected on the forums until that one day when I had to get something else off my chest – Big messed up lies that I’ve done.
You see, I wasn’t perfect. Behind their back, I’ve made alts. I’ve cheated, lied, sustained different personalities through all of them and annoyed the heck out of some of the members. Some members suspected who I originally was when on my alts, but it definitely wasn’t blatantly obvious. Then on my original account, I got promoted to higher ranks on the forum and it felt really good. I spent years on doing this and that day I felt like I was on the top of the world. At the same time however, I felt bad about myself for hiding a truth I know I shouldn’t have done.
It didn’t feel right. I’ve confessed that one time and lost a part of my privileges on the forum. Maybe I was okay with that and I deserved it. I felt that hopefully it’ll turn down the suspicion a bit of some of the members I looked up to and wanted to be friends with. Still anyway, I regret the whole thing. I initially planned to leave the forums the minute I confessed but I didn’t want anyone to think I only joined the forums just to get extra VIP features and that I have a one-sided personality. I didn’t get banned however because I was respected and popular so they let me go without my forum rank.
A few months later, I gave my password to a previously banned user one time so I can just leave and get out of there, both of the mainsite and forum itself. I tried to make friends with him because I needed someone to talk to about how I felt without them judging me in a negative light. I wanted people to think I was a mature, responsible person but then that incident came that got me banned was when I acted on impulse. I was banned because I gave both my forum and mainsite passwords to the guy and in return, lost my moderating and other privileges. I was banned from the forums as well, although I don’t know when I can come back. Now I just want to write down that I’ve messed up big-time. I definitely deserve it since I was let off for a couple of years for all I’ve done on my alts, but I still regret the whole thing sociallywise.
I just wanted to get a strong worthy impression from other people while tackling boredom/letting off steam on my other accounts for some silly reason but boy was I a moron. I feel like rn I just want to apologize to the members that have been hating/disliking me over the years, particularly the ones that’s been suspicious of my alts and other offenses that I’ve caused like being a nuisance and trolling in mid-air when on my alts.
Now, I don’t want to keep reflecting on the past or be overly dramatic. Don’t even bother to reference this anywhere else. I’m just letting off internet steam here. Nothing major. I know that if I write this down, I’ll probably get this thing off my chest and feel better haha.
I didn’t do anything for the next five-six months or so until I left after that summer. Then I took a year hiatus after that to catch up on my school studies until I decided to take a visit on the mainsite since the start of this summer.
I didn’t want to feel pissed off about it because it’s just a website lol, but looking back at it, I’ve felt like I could’ve changed it/prevented anything if I had a time machine. It just felt totally cringy.
But heck, this is life. I need to get out. Staying indoors and playing the X-Box, but I still can’t find my jam. I’m a lazy guy. I need to start studying this summer as well as I’ve already promised hahha XP
I was 15 and a half when I was banned so I guess I’m nearly 17 now (5 days left) and I will be in my final year of high school so at least it helps if I jotted everything that’s been happening on my cyberlife until now. My social life not so much but I’ve only recently started to make good friends in school that’ll stick to you and not treat you like a baby because of your looks so it’s all good.
If anyone has anything to talk about about their life/or felt this way for any particular reaspn or maybe give advice, both personal or impersonal on my life, I’ll be very much appreciated to read what everyone else have to write about.
I thank being here and it's a pleasure to finally find a place where I can spare off some steam. I might need a bit of inspiration btw if that's alright. I hope I haven't really pressured or placed anyone under any circumstances though by posting this.
Thank you
Anyway to summarize what I have to say, I was a total idiot. I got myself banned on another website and I lost my VIP privileges on its mainsite. In turn, I felt like I lost everything else. My friends on that website and pretty much the one thing that brought me there. Respect. I’ve practically been there for nearly seven years which I spent getting games featured, writing game reviews and moderating.
I even felt respected on the forums until that one day when I had to get something else off my chest – Big messed up lies that I’ve done.
You see, I wasn’t perfect. Behind their back, I’ve made alts. I’ve cheated, lied, sustained different personalities through all of them and annoyed the heck out of some of the members. Some members suspected who I originally was when on my alts, but it definitely wasn’t blatantly obvious. Then on my original account, I got promoted to higher ranks on the forum and it felt really good. I spent years on doing this and that day I felt like I was on the top of the world. At the same time however, I felt bad about myself for hiding a truth I know I shouldn’t have done.
It didn’t feel right. I’ve confessed that one time and lost a part of my privileges on the forum. Maybe I was okay with that and I deserved it. I felt that hopefully it’ll turn down the suspicion a bit of some of the members I looked up to and wanted to be friends with. Still anyway, I regret the whole thing. I initially planned to leave the forums the minute I confessed but I didn’t want anyone to think I only joined the forums just to get extra VIP features and that I have a one-sided personality. I didn’t get banned however because I was respected and popular so they let me go without my forum rank.
A few months later, I gave my password to a previously banned user one time so I can just leave and get out of there, both of the mainsite and forum itself. I tried to make friends with him because I needed someone to talk to about how I felt without them judging me in a negative light. I wanted people to think I was a mature, responsible person but then that incident came that got me banned was when I acted on impulse. I was banned because I gave both my forum and mainsite passwords to the guy and in return, lost my moderating and other privileges. I was banned from the forums as well, although I don’t know when I can come back. Now I just want to write down that I’ve messed up big-time. I definitely deserve it since I was let off for a couple of years for all I’ve done on my alts, but I still regret the whole thing sociallywise.
I just wanted to get a strong worthy impression from other people while tackling boredom/letting off steam on my other accounts for some silly reason but boy was I a moron. I feel like rn I just want to apologize to the members that have been hating/disliking me over the years, particularly the ones that’s been suspicious of my alts and other offenses that I’ve caused like being a nuisance and trolling in mid-air when on my alts.
Now, I don’t want to keep reflecting on the past or be overly dramatic. Don’t even bother to reference this anywhere else. I’m just letting off internet steam here. Nothing major. I know that if I write this down, I’ll probably get this thing off my chest and feel better haha.
I didn’t do anything for the next five-six months or so until I left after that summer. Then I took a year hiatus after that to catch up on my school studies until I decided to take a visit on the mainsite since the start of this summer.
I didn’t want to feel pissed off about it because it’s just a website lol, but looking back at it, I’ve felt like I could’ve changed it/prevented anything if I had a time machine. It just felt totally cringy.
But heck, this is life. I need to get out. Staying indoors and playing the X-Box, but I still can’t find my jam. I’m a lazy guy. I need to start studying this summer as well as I’ve already promised hahha XP
I was 15 and a half when I was banned so I guess I’m nearly 17 now (5 days left) and I will be in my final year of high school so at least it helps if I jotted everything that’s been happening on my cyberlife until now. My social life not so much but I’ve only recently started to make good friends in school that’ll stick to you and not treat you like a baby because of your looks so it’s all good.
If anyone has anything to talk about about their life/or felt this way for any particular reaspn or maybe give advice, both personal or impersonal on my life, I’ll be very much appreciated to read what everyone else have to write about.
I thank being here and it's a pleasure to finally find a place where I can spare off some steam. I might need a bit of inspiration btw if that's alright. I hope I haven't really pressured or placed anyone under any circumstances though by posting this.
Thank you
i'm the boss.
I also feel that the respect you get on those gaming sites is just fake, and unfulfilling. I don't like it, personally. I don't like the fake entitlement and the feel of how good people view you, just cuz you cheat while they know not.
