Questions about lost faith

[tunisianeyes]

Salamou 3alaykom

I have a question here. I'm a practicing musim girl (well I guess I can say that, you will understand when you read).
This Ramadan, I really wanted to become closer to Allah so I started reading Quran and doing more prayers. But in the middle of the month, I started having strange thinkings like if Allah really exists and were does He come from. I got really scared because before I knew that the one who doubts about Allah is a disbeliever. So my life when wrong, I was depressed and crying all the time.

Now about a month after the end of ramadan, I don't have these thinkings anymore but I don't have faith either. I'm so lost and confused. I'm scared to death of dying right now in this condition. I strongly believe that we can't come from nothing and that after death, it can't be over. I also believe that the Quran is a book of miracles. But I just can't conceive anymore the idea of Allah. I still pray and read the Quran but when I make du3a I,m like to who are you talking to???

I don't know if anyone who was in this situation or an atheist that converted can help me out to find faith back??

Also I have an other question, I'm just wondering why when I wanted to be closer to Allah, has He rejected me?? I know that Shaytan can whisper to us, but I read that Allah has power over Shaytan so that he doesn't reach us. Is it possible that I have done something wrong and that Allah took me out from his mercy??

My third question is that I have friends not practicing at all but they have a so strong faith?? So why I'm I the one who is loosing it all when i'm the one who is practicing??

And the last thing I want to know is when it's written: Inna Allah yahdi man yasha2 wich means that Allah brings to faith only the ones he wishes to bring?? Does that mean that even if we do efforts, If Allah doesn't want us, we won't be folowing the right path??

wa salam

 

[Snowflake]

My third question is that I have friends not practicing at all but they have a so strong faith?? So why I'm I the one who is loosing it all when i'm the one who is practicing??

assalamu 'alaykum sis,

Because the closer you want to get to Allah, the bigger the effort the shaytaan makes to keep you away. But Allah has given you a choice. If despite all the negative things that come into your head you persist in practicing the deen, eventually the shaytaan will lose his grip on you. He will know he is barking up the wrong tree so to speak. Also, the imaan is never constant. It is said that it is like the wings of a bird, constantly going up and down. So seek Allah's help by making duaa to increase your imaan and from protection from the Shaytaan. Imaan isn't handed on a plate but given as a blessing according to our intentions and deeds. And for that we have to struggle against our nafs (the self). If you can overpower your nafs, everything will become easy for you. This is jihad too - the struggle against the evil within one's self.

Does that mean that even if we do efforts, If Allah doesn't want us, we won't be folowing the right path??

It means that those who struggle to be guided will be guided. Allah is aware of our intentions of what we seek and He gives us accordingly. If Allah didn't want us to be guided why would he tell us to obey Him and do good deeds?

064.004
He knoweth all that is in the heavens and the earth, and He knoweth what ye conceal and what ye publish. And Allah is Aware of what is in the breasts (of men).​

Surah 29:69
As for those who strive in Us, We surely guide them to Our paths, and lo! Allah is with the good.​

Allah has given us a choice.

Surah 73:19
Lo! This is a Reminder. Let him who will, then, choose a way unto his Lord.​

i hope that helped inshaAllah.

 

[The Ruler]

I also believe that the Quran is a book of miracles. But I just can't conceive anymore the idea of Allah. I still pray and read the Quran but when I make du3a I,m like to who are you talking to???

Your du'as seem empty. If you don't know who you're praying to, it's highly unlikely for emotions and real wanting to come through. And you need that.

Your lack of belief in Allah could be due to a lack of knowledge in him. Read the Qur'an... But not just the words. Understand them, their meaning and what they imply.

Also I have an other question, I'm just wondering why when I wanted to be closer to Allah, has He rejected me??

I am as my servant thinks of Me, and I am with him when he remembers Me. If he mentions Me in Himself I mention him in Myself. If he mentions Me in a gathering, I mention him in a better gathering. If he comes near Me one hand-span (shibran) I come near him one cubit (dhira’an). If he comes near Me one cubit I come near him an arm’s length (ba’an). If he comes to Me walking, I come to him running.

My third question is that I have friends not practicing at all but they have a so strong faith?? So why I'm I the one who is loosing it all when i'm the one who is practicing??

How do you know they have a strong faith? Just because they don't question it? You become a firm believer in Islam when you know what it's about. And you know what it's about when you question what it says regarding matters.

And if someone has strong faith, strong actions will follow. Which doesn't seem to be the case with your friends. Though, I'm not necessarily judging them here.

And the last thing I want to know is when it's written: Inna Allah yahdi man yasha2 wich means that Allah brings to faith only the ones he wishes to bring?? Does that mean that even if we do efforts, If Allah doesn't want us, we won't be folowing the right path??

Allah will guide whoever wants to be guided. It's like, Allah will give you the fruits of what you've harvested. If you don't plough the land, you won't get a good yeild of your stuff (no, I'm don't have an in-depth knowledge of farming). That doesn't mean that Allah didn't give you good yeild. It means that you didn't wok hard enough to get that yeild.

I hope I made sense =].

 

[SixTen]

Allah tests even the best of believers, just remember that.

 

[IbnAbdulHakim]

how can ones not practising have strong faith.

that is an oxymoron is it not?