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AmiraLeila

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salam ,
i want to know why i am having dreams of my ex boyfriend we broke up like 1 month ago and hes a muslim and im a muslim ...i know in islam you shouldnt have a boyfriend but he seemed perfect so i thought we could have a relationship ..we are in teen age life so we do mistakes .he has broke up with me several times ,but this one seems really serious this time...we have a long distance relationship because he lives far away but it all seems to quick like i dont understand why i am having dreams of him .? is allah trying to tell me something? will i get back with him again?
 
:sl:
maybe you are having dreams of him because 1) you may not have a sense of disclosure and 2) because your break up is still very fresh.

if its over its over, try not to dwell on it, becuase it will hurt =)
 
thank you yet i would like to know my answers in a bit more of detail so i can understand them in depth and relate to tthe answers
 
In Islam Girl-Boy-Friend Relationships are Haram. You have a history with this guy and your break up might be recent thats why ur longing for him. He broke up with you 3 times, is it worth it? Is he worth ur dreams? Forget him, InshaAllah Allah will bless you with Husband. With a guy like this there is no future, so theres no point hanging onto something that is not even guaranteed to last.

I can understand that 'get over it' is easy to say, but if you sincerely give something up for Allahs sake, Allah will always replace it with something better for you. InshaAllah=)
 
Assalaamu Alaaykum^I agree.

There is no barakah in something done without the will of Allaah, that are forbidden in the first place i.e relationships out of marriage are haraam.

So there is no good in thinking about it, the dreams may be something from what you've been thinking about , or 'fresh' as the sister Umm Sufyaan puts it.

And also just because your in your 'teen' life or anyone doesnt give anyone the excuse of commiting sins. We are either aware of the wrong and stay away from it by fearing Allaah or we do it to fulfill our desires i.e. following in the footsteps of the shaytaan. So basically we know the consequences and yet we still do what 'we' want, but if we do not know then later when we do know we repent and ask Allaah for forgiveness to increase us in righteousness and good manners.

Also there is no such thing as 'it feels right' stuff, yes it would feel right if you were going to marry him, it shouldnt feel right if you were to hang around while knowing its haraam to have such relationships. We need to know the reality of things and be careful, because later when you regret it wont feel so right.

Just try to forget the guy and move on and try to stay away from haraam relationships and if you really want a relationship, start by thinking about having a 'real' one that will actually lead you somewhere and benefit you in all ways possible insha'Allaah...

I hope i helped and forgive me if I sound harsh i apologise.
 
i have an explanation.......Remember some dreams are from the shaytan....it could be your subconscious mind telling you to get back to sinning.....your conscious mind was too strong...so its easier for the devil to attack you whilst asleep.....so when u wake up you are bamboozled.


If you cannot be attacked whilst your awake...you'll be attacked psychologically when you are a sleep
 
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:sl:

Bless.. I know how you feel.. Even I have dreams of "him" :$ And they seem so real, & they're not bad or anything, good infact.. Buh then you remember, dreams are jus dreams, sometimes you dream about wah you fink of during the day.. Maybe that's wah it is in your situation.. If you know you won't be able to be wiv him then you have to stop thinkin about him.. It's the only way.. And if you still feel like there could be a chance then speak to your parents regarding the matter.. But wahever you do, don't fall into a trap, & ask Allah for his help.. All the best babe.. :) xx

:wa:
 
thank you everyone who answered i do respect you and your answer and i have taken into consideration of the fact of forgetting someone its true the past is past my future maybe holding the better inshallah ...my worst has gone but the best has yet to come ..inshallah in the name of allah thank you for the help i appreciate but i dont get it why he broke up it all seem sudden like one min we talking about somthing and the next min we're breaking up...why does allah want me to not have someone who loves me ?
 
AmiraLeila said:
thank you everyone who answered i do respect you and your answer and i have taken into consideration of the fact of forgetting someone its true the past is past my future maybe holding the better inshallah ...my worst has gone but the best has yet to come ..inshallah in the name of allah thank you for the help i appreciate but i dont get it why he broke up it all seem sudden like one min we talking about somthing and the next min we're breaking up...why does allah want me to not have someone who loves me ?
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Plenty of dudes who would love you.....they tend to not want a bf/gf relationship.....they're more into marriage
 
AmiraLeila said:
thank you everyone who answered i do respect you and your answer and i have taken into consideration of the fact of forgetting someone its true the past is past my future maybe holding the better inshallah ...my worst has gone but the best has yet to come ..inshallah in the name of allah thank you for the help i appreciate but i dont get it why he broke up it all seem sudden like one min we talking about somthing and the next min we're breaking up...why does allah want me to not have someone who loves me ?
Click to expand...

He broke it off with you I think cos he got doubts, you see these things never work out because the guy gets doubts when the girl forsakes her honour and morals for him, he starts to think,

"hang on, this girl got involved in a haraam relationship with me, I wonder how many other guys she's been with, I wonder if there was others before me, what kind of girl would get to know and date a guy, not a good girl"

These are all things that go through a guys mind when he's in a haraam relationship with a girl, and that is why they often never work out. It's well known that guys go cold on a girl when she gives them what they want.

Another example would be if a girl does zina with a boy, afterwards he thinks +o( "I wonder how many other guys she's given it too, she's a slag I can't marry her if she's capable of doing that with me" and he pushes her away and goes off and marries a virgin.

It's sad but that's how life is, when you give into what they want, they think you're not a good woman and not worthy of marriage cos of what you did with them.
 
AmiraLeila said:
thank you everyone who answered i do respect you and your answer and i have taken into consideration of the fact of forgetting someone its true the past is past my future maybe holding the better inshallah ...my worst has gone but the best has yet to come ..inshallah in the name of allah thank you for the help i appreciate but i dont get it why he broke up it all seem sudden like one min we talking about somthing and the next min we're breaking up...why does allah want me to not have someone who loves me ?
Click to expand...

:sl:

It is because Allah has someone better in store for you. If he left you the way he did without proposing marriage to you then its obvious he did not love you and was not right or best for you.

Just because you had a relationship with someone who you "thought" was perfect for you it doesnt mean he was. A lot of the times we think we know what is best for us when it clearly isnt.

Imagine if you continued your relationship and wasted many more years and then he left you or things did not go right. You would have been even more ripped apart and hurt.

Just because you dreamt of him it doesnt mean that Allah is trying to give you any signs. Dreams are also from your subconious thoughts as well as from shaythan so they may well be from shaythan or just your thoughts in your subconcious mind.


You have already acknowledged that you made a grave error in getting into a relationship in the first place and you have no learnt from your mistakes but ALWAYS go about marriage in the right way. If you are not ready for marriage then don't get into any relations before marriage as you will not only be committing a major sin but you will also set yourself up to get hurt as most relationships end in a bad way causing terrible pain and anguish as is in your case.

The fact is that a relationship is NOT a guarantee for marriage so therefore when it inevitabley ends then of course it will cause terrible pain because feelings and emotions are involved. Guys and girls involved in relationships particularly teenage relationships will use the other person and tell them they love them and how they feel about them just to get what they want and then when they have they just leave the person and move on to someone else.

A persons first relationship should be in marriage because that is a proper commitment not a relationship ouside of marriage which is much of the time just "messing around" and when things go wrong then it can leave a person scarred for a very long time.

So you must accept what has happened as being the best for you and repent to Allah asking of him to forgive you for ever getting into a relationship in the first place.

If you have learnt anything at all then it should be that you must NEVER lose your chastity and give yourself to ANYONE before marriage as you are ONLY for your marriage partner and NOT for anyone who you may have feelings for outside of marriage. How would your husband ever feel if he were to know what you did before marriage? How would your parents feel?

You will learn after marriage what true love is and when yuo look back you will think how naive you were to get into such a relationship. So never contemplate getting into any relationship again as you must fear Allah. If you were to die in such a state then what would have become of you?

Who is it that will find you your partner? Allah! Then surely if you go about it in the right way then Allah will find you the BEST partner for you!

So when you are ready for marriage then go about it in the right way and you will find many blessings in yuor pursuits. But if you go about it in the wrong way again then you will only find pain and anguish as well as the anger and wrath of Allah.

Make the best of your youth in the service of Allah and waste a second more for death can approach us at ANY moment and believe me death does not wait for ANYONE! It comes not a second ahead or before its appointed time and if our Salaah is not right then surely we are doomed to destruction.

The BEST time to turn towards Allah is in ones youth so turn towards Allah now or regret it FOREVER! NOW is your chance. Choose the right path for that will help you in this life and the next but choose the wrong path and you will suffer in this world and the next.

Choose your friends VERY wisely for you are who your friends are. NEVER hang around with company who commit evils for those evils will eventually influence you and you will end up doing the same. Stick with good and pious friends or those with good characters as they will be your true friends. A friend who commits evil will NEVER be your true friend you mark my words but they will only be poison for you in this world and the next.


We must fulfill our very purpose in this life which is to worship Allah. We need to keep reminding ourselves of death and the hereafter and also the greatness of Allah. We need to always remember our time is too short and can go at any second.

So let us never leave another Salah and when we pray then let us imagine we can see Allah and he is watching us pray so it is best to learn the meanings of what we are praying in our Salaah.

Make the best of your youth and NEVER think that you will make it until old age because our death can come at ANY second and you or me could be next.

So this short life is our ONLY chance to make our hereafter for if we waste this life then we will have nothing in the hereafter and the hereafter is eternity and this life is only a very short time. So is it worth ruining the hereafter for only a short time in this world?

In regards to waking up for Fajr Salaah then you must take the following steps:

1. Try to sleep as early as possible if you do not need to do anything imortant after Isha Salaah because the earlier you sleep the easier it will be to wake up for Fajr

2. Try not to have any heavy meals in the evening as this will make it harder for you to wake up for Fajr

3. Try to encourage your family to also wake up for Fajr and tell them of the importance of Salaah as well as the fact that it is the purpose of our creation. If your family wakes up for Fajr then it will also be easier for you as they would also wake you up. If one or two of your family members do wake up for Fajr then tell them to also wake you up.

4. Make firm intention in your heart that you will wake up for Fajr no matter what and ask of Allah in your dua to make it easy for you to wake up for Fajr prayer.

5. Put on two or even three alarms and put them on 5 minutes apart and put them in places in your room where you know it will be a struggle getting to them. This way you will have to be wide awake to get to the alarms. As there will be three of them this will prevent you going back to bed again.

6. Most importantly when you awaken for Fajr then do NOT say to yourself i'll lay for a bit and then get up. This is the biggest trick of shaythan to make us fall asleep and miss Fajr prayer. As soon as the eyes are open then go straight to the bathroom.


Here are some very beneficial lectures which you should listen to, to increase your imaan and fear of Allah:


Remembrance: ask Allah for his forgiveness

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z-EK9r3rMzQ


AMAZING short speech -"The Goodly Life"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fugf1DcNyc



Angel of Death!!! - Sheikh Ahmed Ali

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tUzRJXlB2uA


HARD HITTING Lecture on HELLFIRE & the Day of JUDGEMENT! يوم القيامة والجحيم

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O6L_fBk7VM

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 1/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DWTehIeCOUU

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 2/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yXTtk7rWx_U

Sheikh Ahmad Ali - Hellfire Talk Part 3/3

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wmiD86w9fBc


Islam - Punishment of the Grave by Sheikh Riyadh ul Haq

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UWb-hYIm2WE

Death and the Grave by Murtaza Khan

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7r2nzJVecqo

How can we not appreciate what we have after watching this?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AkEBUC0APMg


If you need any help, advice or anything at all then please do not hesitate to ask. Please remember me in your duas.

and Allah knows best in all matters
 
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