I think you have a lot going on in your life bro. Like honestly I don't even know if you have a place to just relax. I remember you mentioned that you're the caretaker of your mom and brother, so that's hard in itself, plus to have your noisy neighbors doesn't help at all. I can understand your frustrations, being stuck between a rock and hard place as they say. I think you should take steps to
prove that your neighbors' annoying habits are affecting your life. Going and complaining about them to anyone will probably will not yield much results. Check this out so you can take the necessary steps that will inshallah help you:
LINK. The second thing I'm wondering about is whether the sounds that you're annoyed by are annoying for other people as well? Normally people get used to the sounds that they live around. Like those who live near train stations eventually are able to drown out these sounds. You might have a psychological condition called
misophonia . I know you said that your mom has refused to move out, but maybe try convincing her again? Do you know why she does not want to move?
Salaams my sister,
Thanks for your really kind message.
I never knew about MISOPHONIA. I have researched it and unfortunately, I agree with most of the comments. I literally feel like going round and killing each and every single one of them on a regular basis! If you don't mind, I am going to post the link about MISOPHONIA on the "noisyneighbours" forum I go on. Basically, it's a whole collection of people all over the world who suffer from noisy neighbours and we all support and advise each other on there. The information might come in handy for some people.
The forum I go on is testament that the Police / local authorities in the UK will do nothing about the noise. There are heaps of people who have contacted the Police and the authorities but they have done nothing to help them. When I contacted my local authority about the noise, they emailed back and told me slamming doors all day and night and hoovering bedrooms at midnight was normal. I highly doubt that would be normal behaviour according to Huquqool Ibad and from following the Prophets advise and information on Akhlaaq. The saddest thing is the jaheel family who live next door are actually Muslims (can't be the same as the Islam I follow, it doesn't preach harassment and abuse).
I have tried convincing my Mom to move but she just gets angry and we end up falling out. I completely understand why she does not want to move, this is the house we all grew up in, this is the house her Mom used to come and stay over in, this is the house her Dad helped her buy. All her memories are here. I don't understand what the awful family next door get out of terrorising us like this. They all deserve to be shot. I think I have mentioned my sister too, she is in her late 30's but has the mental age of a young girl, so I have to do a lot of things for her too on top of my everyday work life and trying to keep the noise from driving me insane. It's not easy but I guess such is life. I know folk have said move out and start living on your own, but my Mom is quite poorly at the moment. There is something that she is doing which has me very worried. She takes her socks off, puts them back on again, takes them off, puts them on and repeats this about 30 times every night. I know she is getting on a bit but it still worries me a lot. She has no self confidence and I can literally see her getting scared each time one of the jaheel family slams a door. I can see the fear on her face but if she refuses to move, I can't keep on at her.
I've had an Iman boost from a friend of mine who sent me a hadeeth via email. It seems like the last laugh is on the noisy neighbours. The hadeeth said that if someone abuses another person in this life, the abuser will never enter Jannah until the person who was being abused forgives them. Well I can 100 hundred million per cent guarantee I will NEVER ever forgive the evil family next door. So the stupid father can wail from the Qura'an every day and go to the Masjid every day too, but if he thinks I am going to forgive him for all the years of suffering we have had to endure, he has another thing coming. I know the bigger person forgives people but my life has been put on hold and I have been tormented for such a long time, it's just not going to happen.
I know a lot of people kept telling me to be patient on here over the last year and a half, but it never clicked in my head. I genuinely felt like the Lord was evil and he was only supporting and helping evil people and I felt I was on my own and that was it (I've not had a good night's sleep in years now, even with pills and balms and spray - and when you are so sleep deprived, I think the devil makes an appearance in your head and starts talking to you which I eventually started to believe). But thanks to the email from my friend who explained the hadeeth to me, it's finally made sense. For sure, the noise today almost had me wet myself (they were very very noisy, think 6 people constantly opening and slamming doors constantly for a few hours), but I feel my faith is getting back on track. I know it's going to take a long time for me to get back to who I was and to start following Islam properly but it will happen. I have a lot of wasted time to make up for and I have to find a genuine Imam/Aalim who will support me to get back on track.
Thank you so much to everyone for their ongoing support and friendship and listening to me go on and on and on and on. I actually went to Jummah this week and I even raised my hands after the prayer (I've not been able to raise my hands after prayers for a long long time now) and thanked Allah for helping me and I apologised for being such a moose over the last year or two and thinking he would never help me etc.
I am going to a post about my problems and how I am trying to get my life back on track at some point but I don't know when. My head is in bits today thanks to the constant noise. I know a lot of people that saw my initial angry posts on IB when I joined thought I was retarded. I'm not, I'm just a normal person who has been tested with one of the most jaheel families I have ever known and it really got on top of me and my life.
