Shall I just give up? :(

[AnonymousPoster]

I'm going through some hardship at the moment. When I got my GCSE results, I didn't get the grades I wanted to get into the sixth form.. I was shattered imsad.. I thought okay I got to keep looking.. so I applied for another college, didn't get in.. kept looking then this college who have the exact criteria I was looking for, I applied and thought I'm getting back on track. When I phoned last week to ask them when I was going to get my interview.. they told me that their over-subscribed atm and that they will call me in a few days

I couldn't believe it.. for the past 3 months I've been acting like a proper Muslim.. praying five times a day giving up desires etc.. I've made sincere dua even sometimes cried to Allah(SWT) everyday to seek forgivness, mercy, trust and faith. However, everyday has become even more of a struggle. I just keep getting depressed everyday, I've been patient most of the time. I failed everyone including my parents..imsad

Please help, Jazak..

 

[Adam101]

15 views and yet still no reply.

 

[Adam101]

But yeah anyway.. the best thing you should do is be patient..

Allah says that "with hardship comes ease" and keep making dua and don't give up. Whatever the outcome maybe.. it's for the best as Allah is the best planner:statisfie.

 

[Muslim Woman]

:wa:

...I failed everyone including my parents..imsad

I read an interesting comment somewhere. When anything good happens to us , we don't challange Allah ; we dont' say so many more good people are there ; then why Allah blessed me like this ? So , if any bad things happen to us , we must not say that why why why this happened to me ?

Have patience pl. Allah knows what is good for our hereafter . Just because you are facing hard time now , does not mean you will fail in hereafter .

Pray that you will be successful on the final day :statisfie

 

[Muhaba]

Sometimes dua is not enough. You have to try your best to get what you want and at the same time do dua to Allah to help you get what you want.

Did you study hard all year or did you start studying three months ago and start praying and crying and doing dua to Allah to (miraculously) give you high grades???

And when you didn't get what you wanted, have you now become hopeless that the dua isn't working? What do you want to give up? college or the righteous life you started three months ago? Sorry, don't mean to come across harsh, it's just unclear from your question.

If you are now thinking of giving up righteousness because Allah didn't give you what you wanted, thats ridiculous. We don't lead a righteous life in order to get a good life in this world. We lead a righteous life to obey and please our Lord and Creator Allah and to get Heaven and be saved from Hell.

Allah says in Surah Al-Baqarah, verses 200 - 202:
...But of mankind there are some who say: "Our Lord! Give us (Your Bounties) in this world!" and for such there will be no portion in the Hereafter.

And of them there are some who say: "Our Lord! Give us in this world that which is good and in the Hereafter that which is good, and save us from the torment of the Fire!"

For them there will be alloted a share for what they have earned. And Allah is Swift at reckoning.

So you shouldn't pray and do dua and lead a righteous life simply in order to gain something in this life, but should do so mainly to get the Hereafter and at the same time ask for what you need in this life as well.


Allah will test us with hardships to see whether we are true or not. He knows whether we are being good simply to get something in this life or because we want His pleasure and Heaven, and He will test us likewise. Quitting righteousness when we don't get what we want means we failed the test. May Allah protect us from that.

If you meant "Should I give up college" then no you shouldn't. Continue to search for other colleges. Apply everywhere. If you don't get admission this year, try again next year. There is no limit to when you can study college. In the meantime, get Islamic knowledge. Take an Arabic language course, Attend lectures regularly, if there's an islamic education center near you, register in it and learn as much Islam as you can. Grow in Deen and please Allah. Maybe that's why you couldn't get admission. Because Allah wants you to spend the time learning Islam and becoming more religious. What a lucky person you are if Allah loves you that much!

 

[zakirs]

Please be patient, hardships come and go.

 

[ahmed_indian]

Allah will test us with hardships to see whether we are true or not. He knows whether we are being good simply to get something in this life or because we want His pleasure and Heaven, and He will test us likewise. Quitting righteousness when we don't get what we want means we failed the test. May Allah protect us from that.

Maybe that's why you couldn't get admission. Because Allah wants you to spend the time learning Islam and becoming more religious. What a lucky person you are if Allah loves you that much!

mashallah, wonderful advice. helpful for all muslims in difficult times...

jazaak Allah khair.

 

[Rabi'ya]

Sometimes what we feel is bad is not necessarily bad. I mean Allah sends us lots of different tests throughout our life.

Do not see this as something bad. Have sabr and make sincere duaa again and again. You WILL get what is good for you but that doesnt mean its what you want.

InshAllah as time passes you will look back and realise this.

 

[Afg]

:wa: Dont give up. I know it must feel so bad when you dont get the grades that you needed and you thought you would, but dont give up. I tried for my igcse and Alhamdulillah i passed all my subjects. But you see there was this one subject that i thought i was going to do good in because while i was writing the paper, i knew what i was doing and i was happy with it. And someone else who thought they did so bad was so sad about their paper. When the results came out, that person got an A, and me i didnt fail, but i didnt get what i thought i would. Ya i was upset. And recently for my other exams, that i prayed for and i tried my best, i didnt get good results, although i didnt fail. It felt as though the examiners didnt even look at my work and just gave me any grades. It doesnt feel fair, but what im to do? I can just pray hard and InshaAllah try my best for another coming exam, but dont give up. Keep praying hard, InshaAllah you will get entry into a good college. Just try your best, InshaAllah may Allah help you with your journey.

 

[Salahudeen]

brother don't get so stressed and sad over the duniya, things happen in this life that we don't like and find hard to accept. You just have to come to terms with it and pick yourself up.

When I failed exams I told myself what do I care, don't need a piece of paper to tell me how clever I am. You've already shown the ultimate wisdom and intelligence by embracing Islam

and I also thought to myself why does it bother me so much it's not like this thing is going to help me get into jannah so what's to be sad about ;D

make your goal the akhira and inshallah Allah will suffice you in the dunya, as the hadith goes

"whoever makes his concern the dunya then he is forever chasing after it and never satisfied, and whoever makes his concern the akhira then the dunya comes to him as well as the akhira".

So just focus on the akhira and don't get upset over things that impact your duniya, I know it's easy to say when your not going through what you are but you just have to pick yourself up and say "what do I care, I'm aiming for jannah this wouldn't have helped me get there".

 

[optimist]

I'm going through some hardship at the moment. When I got my GCSE results, I didn't get the grades I wanted to get into the sixth form.. I was shattered imsad.. I thought okay I got to keep looking.. so I applied for another college, didn't get in.. kept looking then this college who have the exact criteria I was looking for, I applied and thought I'm getting back on track. When I phoned last week to ask them when I was going to get my interview.. they told me that their over-subscribed atm and that they will call me in a few days

I couldn't believe it.. for the past 3 months I've been acting like a proper Muslim.. praying five times a day giving up desires etc.. I've made sincere dua even sometimes cried to Allah(SWT) everyday to seek forgivness, mercy, trust and faith. However, everyday has become even more of a struggle. I just keep getting depressed everyday, I've been patient most of the time. I failed everyone including my parents..imsad

Please help, Jazak..

Dear Brother, Assalamu alaikum

Sura Beni Israel says: “When We bless Man with Our bounties, he acts indifferent; when he is in problems, he is frustrated” (17:83; 41:51). Elsewhere, the Quran says: “When We give Man a taste of bounty, he gets carried away. When he begets problems from his own doing, he gets depressed (and disappointed)” (30:36; 42:48).

We normally say ‘This is what Allah wanted’, or ‘It would never have happened if He didn’t want it’, or ‘Whatever takes place in this world is according to Allah’s will. Man cannot intervene in it. The Quran states that it is actually the infidels and polytheists who say that Allah’s will controls all events in Man’s world. Sura Yaseen reports that when the rich are asked to let their wealth flown down to the poor, the infidels reply: ‘How can we enrich those who are poor by Allah’s will?”. The Quran’s response to that is : “surely, you are in grave ignorance!” (36:47). in Sura An’aam: “When you question their (erroneous) way of life, the polytheists will say - ‘It is Allah’s will that we are, and our ancestors were, polytheists” (6:148) Allah rebuts that statement with: “Have you any knowledge? Then produce it for us. You only follow mere conjecture. And you only tell lies.”(6:148)

In fact Allah says to men: “Do whatever you wish. Surely, whatever you do (will bear a result, as it) is watched by Him”(41:40). That is: your are free to do whatever you wish but not free to alter the natural result of that action. Man is free to choose one of the two paths but is NOT free to choose the destination (result). You can’t follow path A and expect to end up at the other end of path B. (or you can’t swallow a pinch of poison and expect it to behave like a lump of sugar.) Every action has a set reaction. You can initiate and trigger a law which then follows its natural course.

This point is illustrated by a story about Omar (r), when a plague broke out, he suggested moving out of the town to a safer distant place. Abu Obaida commented, “You are trying to escape Allah’s law?”. “Yes”, Omar replied, “I am escaping from His (one) law to His (other) law,”. If one stays in a plague-infected area, death comes according to God’s taqdeer (law). But, if one leaves the epidemic-affected environment for cleaner, safer ground, death is avoided according to Allah’s ‘taqdeer’ (law). The choice between the two ‘taqdeers (laws) is entirely Man’s own.

Good and Evil are results of Man’s actions alone. If he employs his capabilities to deal with Nature in accordance with Permanent Values, Good results. Otherwise, Evil is produced. Nature’s Law of Deeds decides on Man’s success and failure to the last iota (99:8-9; also: 2:110; 2:215; 27:89; 28:80; 73:20). Allah has NOT pre-decided success (good) or failure (evil) for Man. What He has pre-determined is the Law both for the physical and the personal aspects (in this life as well as in the hereafter).

However, since the concept of permanent values is non-existent in a ‘wrong’ (non-Quranic) society, a member of it who tries to adhere to and follow such values often incurs material losses. The Quran’s suggestion under such circumstances is to create a society on the basis of Permanent Values – to ensure good for one’s body “حسنات الدنيا” (the worldly benefits) as well as for one’s personality “حسنات الآخرة” (the benefit of hereafter). One must safeguard oneself against all evil systems. Suar Aale Imran: “if you are steadfast and adhere to Allah’s laws, no plot of them (enemies) can harm you” (3:119). Elsewhere, it says: “Had the inhabitants of these settlements been convinced of Allah’s laws and adhered to them, they would have been showered upon by bounties of the sky and the earth. But they rejected those laws and they were apprehended because of their own deeds” (7:96). Therefore, harm comes to Man due to his own actions – “If you keep on the right track, no one can hurt you” (5:105).

Thus, Allah laws will only impart benefits to Man. That is why such acts that bears good and occurs in accordance with Allah’s laws are attributed to Allah and all evil attributed to mans actions. Refer to the Battle of Bedr where the holy fighters (who had already been called Allah’s Party) were told: “It was Allah killing them, not you”, and also that “you did not shoot arrows at them. Allah did” (8:17).

Similarly, on the occasion of the Accord at Hudaibiya, Muslims repeated to the ‘Rasul Allah’ (the messenger) the oath under which they had sold their wealth and persons to Allah (9:111), it is referred to as: “Those who were making an agreement with you (O Rasul!) did in actual effect made it with Allah!” At the time of the oath-taking ceremony, “Allah’s hand was there above your hand!” (48:10).

Not only the universal events but also the potential and actions of humans is attributed to Allah. Sura Ar-Rahman: “Allah created Man and taught him to speak” (55:3-4). Elsewhere it says: “The One who taught him the use of the pen” (96:4). Sura Maaeda says: “(Those animals) which you train (to hunt) as Allah has trained you” (5:4). All this goes to say that the Quran attributes directly to Allah whatever occurs or is done in accordance with His laws through the potential given to Man by Him.

Please remember, the Quran announces: “There is no calamity but brought upon you by your own hands” (42:30) - be it individual, like touching a flame, or collective as a dam giving way or the righteous suffering in a wrong society!. The fact that Allah doesn’t disgrace anyone randomly or whimsically. Allah is never unfair to anyone. It has been has been illustrated many times over in the Quran. Sura Aal-e-Imran talks about the tyrants of society being eventually destroyed, and -- “Allah is not unfair to them but they are unfair to themselves” (3:116). Sura Tauba, after speaking of destruction of the nations of the past, says: “Allah did not treat them cruelly, but they brought it upon them themselves” (9:70). Also in 11:101; 16:33 and 29:40. Sura Younis states: “Allah is not unfair to people in the slightest, but they do it to themselves” (10:44). Allah’s being cruel and unfair to Man is inconceivable. People bring tragedies to themselves by their own hands (ذلك بما قدمت يدك) “Allah is not cruel to His creatures” (22:10). In fact, “Allah doesn’t (even) intend to be cruel to His people” (40:31).

Wassalam

 

[optimist]

In the battle of Uhud, the Muslims were on the verge of victory when a contingent of archers, going against their commander’s instructions, shifted from their position. This tactical mistake cost them dearly and they suffered heavy losses. Sura Aal-Imran narrates this episode:

“You were killing the enemy according to Allah’s law, were about to be victorious, and He was about to fulfill His promise to you. But, you faltered. You began to argue among yourselves over the situation and you disobeyed (your commander) and failed to wrest victory which was only moments away.” (3/152)

Afterwards, when Muslims pondered upon the setback with ‘ How did it happen?’, Allah’s reply to that was very clear: “Tell, (them O Prophet!), that was from your own selves.” (3/165). The same verse states this fact very clearly. “Among you are some that hanker after this world and some that desire the Hereafter. Then did He divert you from your foes in order to test you but He forgave you: For Allah is full of grace to those who believe.”(3:152). Here it DOES NOT mean Allah deliberately diverted them from the enemy, if that is so the Allah would not say the believers were at fault. It only means that when some of the Muslims were taken over by short-term benefits their attention was diverted away from the enemy according to Allah’s law of returns and the enemy could overpower them. But there is always opportunity to correct and learn from mistakes as the same verse states. “Behold! ye were climbing up the high ground, without even casting a side glance at any one, and the Messenger in your rear was calling you back. There did Allah give you one distress after another by way of requital, to teach you not to grieve for (the booty) that had escaped you and for (the ill) that had befallen you. (3:153)

"And whatever misfortune befalls you is the consequence of what your own hands have wrought." (42:30)
وَمَا أَصَابَكُمْ مِنْ مُصِيبَةٍ فَبِمَا كَسَبَتْ أَيْدِيكُمْ

But it happens according to Allahs Izn and decree.

مَا أَصَابَ مِنْ مُصِيبَةٍ إِلَّا بِإِذْنِ اللَّهِ
Sura Taghaban -- “No calamity befalls you but by Allah’s Izn.” (64:11)

Well, is there any contradiction between the above two verses? There is no contradiction. Here “To permit”, means “to let (something happen)” or “to allow (something to occur)”. Although Allah lets the calamities befall, the real CAUSE of all of man’s calamities is the man himself. There is a big difference between “to let something happen” and “to cause something to happen”. Allah has made laws for everything and one of His most important laws is the law of cause & effect. He has defined or pre-determined effect(s) for every cause. He has granted man the free will and empowered him with the ability to set off the cause(s). When a cause is triggered by man, Allah lets the (pre-determined) effect happen. In case of man’s calamities, the cause is always triggered by the man himself; Allah just lets the calamities befall.

We are free to do whatever we wish but not free to alter the natural result of that action. ‘taqdeer’ of a person who puts a hand in fire is burning. When that burn is treated with a balm, soothing becomes its taqdeer.

 

[Muhaba]

[quoteAfg;1219958]
But you see there was this one subject that i thought i was going to do good in because while i was writing the paper, i knew what i was doing and i was happy with it. And someone else who thought they did so bad was so sad about their paper. When the results came out, that person got an A, and me i didnt fail, but i didnt get what i thought i would. [/quote]

LOL that always happens. Whenever i thought i had written some essay really well, i would get low grades and when i thought i didn't write it well, i'd get really good grades.