The Best Fatwa Ever!

Khalid Saifullah

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Q: Assalaamu Alaikum Respected Shaikh

I'm 90 years old and I've never kept even one fast in Ramadan in all these years. I realise my mistake and want to give kaffarah (expiation). What should I do?

A: You are in very deep trouble, my brother. Your kaffarah is one of three things:

1) You need to fast continuously for two hundred years; or

2) You need to provide a meal for the whole of China; and if you can not do the above

3) You need to free Palestine!!

The old man fainted.
 

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