The pain was nothing she could put into words...but the only thing she could do was express it. She had no outlet, no one to tell, no one to cry to. She started writing this in hopes that one day her pain would be understood by someone out there and she would feel a sense of sympathy from a stranger. But she believed wholeheartedly that this was not going to happen. In order to fathom her pain, one had to be her because only she was who she is. Only she had lived the life she lived. Only she had experienced life as she knew it and only she carried the attributes she did.
She was in pain. A very real pain. A pain that no one could contain, maintain or retain. A pain that could not be repressed or expressed. This was a pain like no other. She was love, a “globule of light”. She was put on this earth to love, to feel, to believe. This was the pain of her purpose being ripped from her. This was the pain of her core being ripped from her existence. This was the pain of her hope being thrust into the lion’s den. This was the pain of her dreams being liquefied. This was the pain of her reality disappearing in the blink of an eye.
The story behind this pain is so painful she could not put it into words. She would stare blankly at this page until one day she could tell her story. She would carry this burden until her heart stopped beating. Her cause of death will be no mystery. Her pain will take her last breath just as it has taken her all. Thriving on her last few breaths, this is all she could express. This is all she could let out. This is all she had detangled. The pain; nothing more, nothing less.
Give glad tidings to those who bare the pain they go through with patience for the very purpose of pain is to make a person stronger and closer to Allah.
The pious prefer pain over pleasure. They prefer illness over good health, They prefer sadness over happiness. All because they know that when they are inflicted with any type of pain it is because Allah is wanting good for them and wanting them to be closer to him.
If a person did'nt feel pain how would they become stronger? If pain did not exist then what is the purpose of this life? Pain is a test from Allah and without pain how would be be tested?
Pain distinguishes between those who will come close to Allah and those who would go further away.
If there was no pain then how would we appreciate happiness? If there was no illness then how would we appreciate good health?
How would we gain the sweetness of imaan without feeling pain?
What pleasure would there be in achieving Jannah if we went through no pain? What pleasure would there be in achievement if we went through no pain in achieving it?
If pain did not exist then how will one really appreciate what we have for there will always be those who have and are going through more pain then we can ever imagine. When we look around we may see smiley faces but do we really know what kind of pain a person is going through?
Allah knows our pain and he knows what we are going through. If we accept the pain as it is his decree and be patient and even closer to him then know that he is with those people and when he wants good for a person then he gives them pain and when that person bares the pain with patience and forbearance then he rewards that person eternity of bliss for their short time in pain.
Then give glad tidings to those in pain who bare with it with patience and call upon their lord with hope,faith,trust and reliance in him for Allah is with and close to those people and their reward can only be Jannah!
In a Hadith Qudsi Allah states:
"O son of Adam, as long as you call upon Me and put your hope in Me, I have forgiven you for what you have done and I do not mind. O son of Adam, if your sins were to reach the clouds of the sky and then you would seek My forgiveness, I would forgive you. O son of Adam, if you were to come to Me with sins that are close to filling the earth and then you would meet Me without ascribing any partners with Me, I would certainly bring to you forgiveness close to filling it."
Sister,
