
brother,
I understood what you mean. You have to keep in mind, there are billions Moderate Muslims everywhere. Some Ex-Muslims (became Christians) were the result of bad abusing or unhappy in whole life by Extremists. I know there are some extremists happened in some countries.
Unfortunately there are those who then come to the West, where they can practice their religion in peace but abuse that freedom
If I am in the shoes in this situation, I would completely understand the feeling and would leave bad situation, not the fault of Islam.
It doesn't help, however, that any person with an internet connection can turn themselves into an online Mullah - dispensing 'rulings' that are little more than 'opinions'.
Islam taught us to be patience, tolerance, and respect, some people don't follow this techniques unfortunately due to cultures influences and very strict.
Islam also freed individuals from the bonds of collectivism; from tribalism, racism, and other collectivist thought. Unfortunately, however, instead of getting rid of those negative things, there are those who use Islam to express their narrow minded opinions using religions language hoping it gives them more authority.
I'm sure you've probably seen it many times when people claiming Islam does this and that when in reality it is the individuals cultural interpretation. If they articulated that it was their cultural interpretation - no problems, but those sorts of people make claim that their interpretation is 'the Islam'.
Let's consider this: "There is no compulsion in religion, for the right way is clearly from the wrong way. Whoever therefore rejects the forces of evil and believes in God, he has taken hold of a support most unfailing, which shall never give way, for God is All Hearing and Knowing." 2:256
*compulsion means FORCE! In Arabic, we called Allah (God).
Wasalaam.
It doesn't help when there are those within the Ummah who use Hadith to abrogate the Qur'an or maintain that parts of the Qur'an abrogate other parts. I'm with Ziauddin Sardar (
http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/quran/ ) who maintains that there are no abrogations within the Qur'an. The verses is in reference to replacing previous revelations, and the use of abrogation quite frankly is the easy way out trying to understand the Qur'an. The Qur'an is a challenge, it isn't meant to be easy - it is a challenge to humanity in which with each new generation the Qur'an can be approached from a new new angle and still kept relevant.
Going off on an angle; this is why the literalist interpretation is doomed to failure - because as soon as the literalist finds a conflict between the world and their understanding - they curl up into the foetal position hoping that it'll all go away.