to marry or not to marry...

  • Thread starter Thread starter dovelove
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would you marry disabled


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To be completely honest, I wouldn't as I don't think I would be able to handle them. I guess I'm shallow but that is my opinion.
 
for those who would not marry a disabled due to whatever reasons, how would you feel if subhanAllah u had a disabled child? Or again what would you do if ur hubby/wifey did buk up in an acident and ended up unable to walk, had to have major surgery to save their life, organs, limps removed, blind, deaf, took up with post traumatic stress disorder, panic attacks, anxiety etc?

obviously not many of us know how we would ultimately react act in the given situation but im just trying to get a feel on where do disabled people fit into the scale of muslim behaviour, so I not asking what you should do but what would you do or think you would do?

And what goes through your mind when you see or meet a disabled muslim, do you question them what happened, do you pity them, do they disgust you, do you tell them things will be ok, do you try to be sensitive towards them?

im not really nosey just interested and concerned.

Fe aman Allah u and urs
peacelove
 
And what goes through your mind when you see or meet a disabled muslim, do you question them what happened, do you pity them, do they disgust you, do you tell them things will be ok, do you try to be sensitive towards them?

i have a couple of people in my family that are noticeably disabled, one so severely they are a vegetable, everytime i see her i feel like crying because she has sooooooooooooo much patience subhanAllah-literally a vegetable, cant do nothing.
another is a cousins daughter, she likes to be treated normal and she is. i do feel for her when her bones are hurting etc but dont think her disability is something to be ashamed of.
other minor stuff like crooked arm/limp etc i dont see that as a 'disability' as such.

i did say no to the original question after reading some posts/it really depends what is considered a 'disability' SubhanAllah.
 
:sl:

One of my best friends has cerebral palsy and walks with a cane. To be honest, I don't even see it most of the time. I have said something about going bowling or something like that he has to remind me that he can't because of his condition.

So no, I would have no problem marrying anyone with a disability.
 
I would. If there is true love, such things can be overcome.

Now here's another similar question: Could you marry someone with a sexually transmittable disease? Let's say that it is one which is nonlethal and which doesn't prevent enjoying sex, but causes considerable pain during your daily life.
 
Assalam alaykum.

It would depend on the disability, because if it was a serious one where say he couldnt walk/move and needed 24 hr care then I'd find it difficult to look after him on my own. But obviously I'd look at all the other qualities in that person before making the final decision.

I'd have to consider both our rights. What if we werent able to fulfill each others' rights and it led to a miserable marriage? What if at first I'm like 'I dont mind looking after you, I'd sacrifice my own life to look after you etc' and then after living with him for a few months, found it too difficult, or found the responsibility too much? And he felt like he was a burden on me? And then we both became depressed? And then it leads to a breakdown of the marriage leaving us both in a bad, sad situation?
 
Before marriage, if given that option, I'd be tempted to decline (although depending on the severity of the disability). I think most people would.

It's easy to sacrifice certain rights in the initial stages but shaytan will attack you left right and centre and make the marriage (which in itself is already a difficult endevour) that much more harder. So it's a question of being practical and logical.
 
the fact of the matter is, someone who is perfect physically could be a complete idiot. so, i think deen matters ALOT, and if you have enough iman to look past the physical, then yes, its possible.
But you have to have the means to do that.
easier said than done.
 
I said no only because the question cannot be asked in a simple yes or not format as there are many things one would take into consideration when making such a decision...

if the person happens to be someone I knew, and loved before they fell into a disabled state then I would most likely say yes and stay with that person but if it was a complete stranger who I had not known and was asked to marry, I would definitely say no...
 
This could happen to any one of us anytime : car accident, disease, etc. We could be disabled and looking for someone to love us and care about us. Not choosing someone because he is disabled is really..harsh, if we put ourselves in his shoes.
Who really knows what could happen in the future ?
Taking care of a disabled partner may seem difficult. But if we have enough love for him/her and we are devoting our life and our deeds for Allah's sake it will become easy and enjoyable. The joy we feel when we give all we have to others for the sake of Allah. We all heard beautiful stories of such couples, especially among muslims.
Don't know what life will bring, but, could not put "No"
 
It depends on what type of disability, if the brother isnt able to provide then no and if he is abe to then it depends on his personality and if he is practising
 

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