Urdu Latife (Urdu Jokes)

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Sardar Jokes

Santa Singh sent his bio data to America to apply for a post in Microsoft. A few days later he got this reply:- Dear Mr. Singh, You do not meet our requirements. Please do not send any further correspondence. No phone call shall be entertained. Thanks

Santa singh jumped with joy on receiving this reply. He arranged a party and when all the guests had come, he said Bhaiyon aur Behno,aap ko jaan kar khushi hogee ki mujhay america mein naukri mil gayee hai." Everyone was delighted. Santa singh continued Ab main aap sab ko apnaa appointment letter padkar sunaongaa par letter english main hai isliyen saath-saath hindi main translate bhee kartaa jaongaa.

Dear Mr. Singh-----pyare singh sahab

You do not meet----aap to miltay hee naheen ho

our requirement----humko to zaroorat hai

Please do not send any furthur correspondance----ab letter vetter bhejnay kee zaroorat nahee hai.

No phone call ----phone vone kee bhee zaroorat nahee hai

shall be entertained----bahut khaatir kee jayegi.

Thanks----aapkaa bahut bahut shukriya
 
^ LOL. . . .

A pathan got highest marks in high school, local news paper approached him and held a small interview.

At the end, reporter asked, "what do you want to be in future."

He replied happily, " bachpan sey khahish hey bara ho k apna landey ka karobar karon."
 
zÂk said:
Weird pathans
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abdulmājid ;1407849 said:
Weird Tilmeez ke dostaan...
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Aray Bhaio yeh to Kuch bhi nahi hay. Far7an Bhai ki Ijazat say aik do Waqiat araz hain:

Aik pathan say kisi nay pocha Khan Saab tum ko Sardi lagta hay to kia kartay ho?
Pathan: Hum heater kay pass bayth jata hay.
Aadmi: Agar phir bhi sardi kam na ho to kia kartay ho.

Pathan: Hum heater ko ON kar dayta hay :X



Aik or Khan saab ki suno:
Pathan nay Jaan per Khail kar Jalti hui building main say 6 logon ki jaan bachai.
Logon nay Khan Saab ko bohat maara.... pata hay kion?!?

6 kay 6 aadmi Fire Department kay thay :X

Kia Samjhay:p
 
Father: What about your result?

Son: Wo headmster sahab ka beta hain na wo fail ho gaya.

Father: Wat about you?

Son: Wo Doctor sahab ka beta haina wo bhi fail.

Father:What's your result?

Son: Khan sab ka beta bhi fail hai.

Father:you idiot! I'm asking about you.

Son:To aap kaunse Albert Einstein ho jo apka beta pass hua hoga.
 
Santa : are aapka kutta to sher jaisa dikhta hai, kya khilate ho?
banta : ye sher hi hai, saala pyar mohabbat ke chakkar me padkar kutte jaisa ho gaya hai.

Say NO to Valentine's Day!!!!
 
abdulmājid;1409185 said:
Father: What about your result?

Son: Wo headmster sahab ka beta hain na wo fail ho gaya.

Father: Wat about you?

Son: Wo Doctor sahab ka beta haina wo bhi fail.

Father:What's your result?

Son: Khan sab ka beta bhi fail hai.

Father:you idiot! I'm asking about you.

Son:To aap kaunse Albert Einstein ho jo apka beta pass hua hoga.
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:D LOL Dont understand Urdu that well but this was pretty simple to decipher..for some unknown reason :)
 
abdulmājid;1409189 said:
^ aapku rep. points dene ke liye paise lagte kya jo lol bolneke liye quote karrai?
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Hahaha :D Im not even going to bother replying in Urdu LOL

Rep Sent..For Free!!:D
 
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Ek shaayar garibi se tang aakar Daaku Ban gaya.

Dakaiti karne ek bank gaya aur bola-

Arz hai-
Takdir me jo hai wahi Milega,
Takdir me jo hai wahi Milega,
...
Hands Up koi apni jagah se nahi Hilega.


phir Cashier se kaha.

kuch khwaab meri aankho se nikaal do,
kuch khwaab meri aankho se nikaal do,
...
Jo kuch bhi tumhare paas hai jaldi se is bag me daal do.


Bahut koshish karta hun teri yaad bhulane ki,
Bahut koshish karta hun teri yaad bhulane ki,
...
koi koshish na kare police ko bulane ki.


Bhula de mujhko kya jata hai tera,
Bhula de mujhko kya jata hai tera,
...
Main goli maar dunga,jo kisi ne picha kiya mera.

;D;D;D


No quoting of the post please.
 
Mayawati apne friend Lalu ke ghar GOAT le ke jati hai..

Lalu: E Bhaiswa ko kyun Layi ho ?

Mayawati: Dikhta nahi, Goatwa hai

Funny Lalu: Hum Goatwa se hi Puch raha Hun..!!


******​

Santa ek Sadhu se bola: Baba, meri biwi bahut pareshan karti hai, koi upay batao.

Funny Sadhu: Beta, upaay hota to main sadhu kyun banta?
 
Polio kay Qatray pilanay wali team nay pathan kay ghar ka darwaza khatkhatya.
Pathan bahir aya or team ko dekha or apni begum ko Awaaz dee, "Begum Bandook or Kartoos kahan hain?"
Polio team yeh sun kar bhag gai.
Pathan un kay pechay gia or un ko pakar kar kaha... Dartay kion ho yeh mery bachon kay naam hain :X
 
I would like some brothers to please pay attention to the lesson in following joke :X

1 Sahib dosray sahib say: Aap ka Kutta to bilkul Shair Dikhta hay, Kia khilatay hain aap is ko?
Dosra Admi: O bhai yeh Shair he hay, Sala Piyar Muhabat kay chakkar main per kar Kuttay jaisa ho gia hay. :D
 
Tilmeez said:
1 Sahib dosray sahib say: Aap ka Kutta to bilkul Shair Dikhta hay, Kia khilatay hain aap is ko?
Dosra Admi: O bhai yeh Shair he hay, Sala Piyar Muhabat kay chakkar main per kar Kuttay jaisa ho gia hay.
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:lol:

I would like some brothers to please pay attention to the lesson in following joke
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lesson for sisters: Be careful, saare sher baad mei kuttay ban jaatey hain:p
 

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