Urgent Help Needed

[FreePalestine]

brothers and sisters

I advise you that this may be a lengthy post, but if you could read it I would greatly appreciate it.

I don't know where to begin...I am only 18 years old but I feel like the world rests of my shoulders due to stress and anxiety. There are many reasons for my anxiety. Mainly due to this girl I met. Before anyone judges me, please read the whole thing :hmm: It all started about a year ago, I met this non-muslim girl who I thought I "liked" but it didn't not happen allhamdillah. However, this is where my stress and anxiety began to ensue, and it was horrible. I did not know what to do. I felt suffocated at times, my health dropped and I lost almost 20 pounds. Along my way to recovery, I met this other muslim girl, however allhamdillah that I met her. She honestly changed my life. She made me much happier, and much better Muslim. I pray 5 times a day allhamdillah and I have a much different outlook on the world. I feel so happy just talking to her or even thinking about her. I saw her at the masjid one time and it made my heart melt. However, I started to like her because of all these reasons; she made me a better person. We are very close to each other and we trust each other very much. We told each other that we were not going to make any more mistakes. I like her, but I am pretty sure she only sees me as a friend, or as a brother. And now, there is where my stress begins all over again. I honestly do not know what to do. I feel so helpless and depressed. I am sorry if this post doesn't make sense at times..there is just so many things going on through my head. I would wait as many years as it took for me to actually tell her that I like her, but I feel like if I wait, she will like someone else.

If you have read this far, :jz:. I really appreciate it. Thank you all in advance

 

[جوري]

hmmmm...
You know when you're at the tender age of 18 there's so so much going on in your life and in your body and your hormones that it effects you many different ways. I understand how you feel as I guarantee we've all been there.. but unless you're honestly willing to make a commitment to marriage and can meet with the Islamic criteria for that including financial independence then try to use the rope Allah swt brought you and she revived in you and hang on to prayers and fast and focus on your studies and religion for now.. ride the wave don't drown..

 

[Snowflake]

Wa alaykum assalam wa rahmatullahi wb,

Some of the strongest and purest emotions we feel are at a young age, before we become aware of the evil people are capable of committing. Our thoughts on marriage are about sincere commitment and honesty with whoever has/will come into our life. If marriage doesn't happen at a young age some people fall into sin. Some become disillusioned with it through seeing other people's bad marriages, and some end up marrying out of desperation for the wrong reasons.

What have you got to lose? This is a beautiful age to get married. If you wait years to propose and her answer is no, then you'll have wasted all those years for nothing and will end up feeling resentful and hurt. If you propose now, and the answer is 'no' at least you won't have wasted precious time and can move on with your life.

I know a young couple who married while in Uni. They stayed with their parents until after they finished their studies and are together now. Hence it is possible to marry even if you aren't yet able to support her financially. The only thing left now is to make istikhara and ask her wali for her hand in marriage. If after doing istikhara her reply is in the negative then believe that Allah knows this union wasn't going to be good for your deen dunya and end and so He withheld it from you. Then be patient and let Allah replace your loss with something better. A few months misery is better than a life time of pain.

May Allah fulfill your desire if it is good for you on every account. Ameen.