Urgent Help

[anonymous]

Salam,

[h=6]"A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. You should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be a loser. "(Bukhari) And he said, "The whole world is a provision, and the best object of benefit of the world is the pious woman. " (Muslim) Hadith (Sayings of Prophet Muhammed SAW)[/h]I am looking for a woman who is religious. How do I go about judging the religion of a woman? If she prays 5 times (misses fajr sometimes), is that considered a religious woman? What if she reads kaafir authors and philosophers such as Bertrand Russel, C.S. Lewis, Spinoza? What if she says "Islam is not so illogical to not allow woman to work in public?" Is that a sign of a pious Muslima??????

I am just so so confused about this whole religious thing, as I cant determine if a person who appears to fulfill fard of Islam is still "pious?"

Plz helpp!

 

[Snowflake]

wa alaykum assalam wa rahmatullahi wb,

How do I go about judging the religion of a woman?

You are allowed to ask her through her wali brother. Here's a list of one hundred questions you can ask potential spouse. I recommend making Istikhara and dua to seek the help of Allah subhana wa ta'ala. A sister used to ask Allah for a pious husband, by the words, 'O Allah grant me a husband with whom You are pleased with.' And Allah indeed blessed her with a wonderful husband with whom she and her family are really happy with. Masha Allah.

 

[ardianto]

Assalamu'alaikum

The best way to find religious woman is through the religious sisters, like the sisters in Muslimah organization. Tell them you are looking for a wife. Then they will recommend someone. I say this is the best way, because the woman that they recommend is the woman who qualified as good Muslimah. They will not recommend someone who unqualified. Of course, they will 'review' you first. If they think you are not qualified, they would not recommend anyone.

You can tell the sisters directly if you know one or few of them. Or you can ask your uztads or brothers to tell those sisters. This is the common way of Muslim activists in my place when they are looking for a wife.

If you ask about a woman to her wali or her family, very possible you would not get the right information because they would promote anything good about her that usually exaggerated, and they would hide anything bad about her.

 

[Hamza Asadullah]

Salam,

[h=6]"A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. You should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be a loser. "(Bukhari) And he said, "The whole world is a provision, and the best object of benefit of the world is the pious woman. " (Muslim) Hadith (Sayings of Prophet Muhammed SAW)[/h]I am looking for a woman who is religious. How do I go about judging the religion of a woman? If she prays 5 times (misses fajr sometimes), is that considered a religious woman? What if she reads kaafir authors and philosophers such as Bertrand Russel, C.S. Lewis, Spinoza? What if she says "Islam is not so illogical to not allow woman to work in public?" Is that a sign of a pious Muslima??????

I am just so so confused about this whole religious thing, as I cant determine if a person who appears to fulfill fard of Islam is still "pious?"

Plz helpp!

Jazakallahu khayr for the question. Surely it should be the desire of every man and woman to marry a partner who is pious or at least tries their utmost to follow Islam in accordance with the Qur'an and Sunnah and a partner who also tries thier utmost to live her life as well as aligning their thinking regarding Islamic matters in accordance with the understanding of the Qur'an and Sunnah the way the salaf and scholars of the past and present understand it. They would strictly observe the prayers and would want to live their life by Islam. They would try their utmost to do everything to please Allah and refrain from anything which angers or displeases him.

She would strictly observe hijaab as well as jilbaab and not wear tight clothes revealing her definition nor would she wear overly bright colours and too much make up. The woman would also want to bring her children up in accordance with the deen and she would also want you to be practising and even have a beard as a truly practising woman is attracted to a truly practising man.

You should ask women folk of your family to do research on a particular sister when you come across one you are considering for marriage. You should also see her and speak to her infront of her mahrams and have your own set of questions in order to determine whether she is the one for you or not. After all of that you should make isthikhara and ask of Allah sincerely that if this person is best for you and you best for her then let the marriage go through and if not then let you both go your seperate ways. Then trust in Allah and whatever is best will happen for you.

May Allah find you the best partner for you. Ameen