AnonymousPoster
Anonymous
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I recently prayed isthikara first few days i felt quite neutral about the decision that im seeking help for when i got up to read my fazar prayers i felt quite good but i had no feeling that inclined me to particular decision.
However on wednesday as part of work meeting i had to go to this place which brought back lot of memories which i didnt want to remember and on the night i felt really down. To make feel more down I was watchingthis programme on peace tv about a man who converted and how people doubt our religion and think we just practise it to find comfort and we as human created god. That really upset me cause my faith is the only thing keeping me going at mo.
anyway on that night i prayed isthikara again as i was told we have to perform it 7 days in a row.
when i woke up yesterday i felt very negative all those feeling of past kept coming back which is affecting my decision which I was seeking help for. I felt like i wanted to go back my old ways and life was so much easier but deep down i know thats not what i want to do. but little voice in my head kept telling me who am i doing all this for trying to be good is there really god ( astagfirullah i hate my self for those thoughts even entering my minds) but its really upsetting me i feel so down and lost. I have been praying to Allah and seeking forgiveness for those thoughts but i keep feeling so negative about the path im following.
Have i done the isthikara wrong how come im feeling so negative about my faith
please brothers and sisters any help advice would be appreciated.
However on wednesday as part of work meeting i had to go to this place which brought back lot of memories which i didnt want to remember and on the night i felt really down. To make feel more down I was watchingthis programme on peace tv about a man who converted and how people doubt our religion and think we just practise it to find comfort and we as human created god. That really upset me cause my faith is the only thing keeping me going at mo.
anyway on that night i prayed isthikara again as i was told we have to perform it 7 days in a row.
when i woke up yesterday i felt very negative all those feeling of past kept coming back which is affecting my decision which I was seeking help for. I felt like i wanted to go back my old ways and life was so much easier but deep down i know thats not what i want to do. but little voice in my head kept telling me who am i doing all this for trying to be good is there really god ( astagfirullah i hate my self for those thoughts even entering my minds) but its really upsetting me i feel so down and lost. I have been praying to Allah and seeking forgiveness for those thoughts but i keep feeling so negative about the path im following.
Have i done the isthikara wrong how come im feeling so negative about my faith
please brothers and sisters any help advice would be appreciated.