What does your Scripture have to say about the treatment of Parents?

  • Thread starter Thread starter - Qatada -
  • Start date Start date
  • Replies Replies 20
  • Views Views 4K
- Qatada -

- Qatada -

Spread this Avatar!
Messages
11,349
Reaction score
2,692
Gender
Male
Religion
Islam
:salamext:


What's the stance in your religion in regard to the treatment of parents? :) Please quote your scripture. I think this is an interesting topic.
 
In the Qur'an, Allaah Almighty says:
[Your Lord has decreed that you worship none but Him and that you be kind to parents. Whether one or both attain old age in your life, say not to them a word of contempt nor repel them, but address them in terms of honor. And out of kindness lower to them the wing of humility and say, "My Lord, bestow on them Your mercy as they cherished me in childhood."] (Al-Israa' 17:23-24)​


 Islam guides us to obey parents in all matters unless it is sinful, and Allaah uses a really interesting example, because He uses the example of a pious man teaching his son. Allaah says:

​
And (remember) when Luqman said to his son when he was advising him: "O my son! Join not in worship others with Allah. Verily! Joining others in worship with Allah is a great Zulm (wrong) indeed.

 And We have enjoined upon man [care] for his parents. His mother carried him, [increasing her] in weakness upon weakness, and his weaning is in two years. Be grateful to Me and to your parents; to Me is the [final] destination.

 [But if they strive with thee to make thee ascribe unto Me as partner that of which thou hast no knowledge, then obey them not. Consort with them in the world kindly and follow the path of him who turns to Me in repentance and in obedience. Then to Me will be your return, and I shall tell you what you used to do.]
​
(Luqman 31: 13-15)

​

The Messenger of Allaah peace be upon him said:​

 It was narrated that Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) said: A man came to the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) and said: O Messenger of Allaah, who among the people is most deserving of my good company? He said, Your mother. He asked, Then who? He said, Your mother. He asked, Then who? He said, Your mother.He asked,Then who? He said, Then your father.

(Authentically Narrated by al-Bukhaari, 5626; Muslim, 2548)​
 
Last edited:


وَقَضَى رَبُّكَ أَلاَّ تَعْبُدُواْ إِلاَّ إِيَّاهُ وَبِالْوَالِدَيْنِ إِحْسَانًا إِمَّا يَبْلُغَنَّ عِندَكَ الْكِبَرَ أَحَدُهُمَا أَوْ كِلاَهُمَا فَلاَ تَقُل لَّهُمَا أُفٍّ وَلاَ تَنْهَرْهُمَا وَقُل لَّهُمَا قَوْلاً كَرِيمًا {23}​
[Pickthal 17:23] Thy Lord hath decreed, that ye worship none save Him, and (that ye show) kindness to parents. If one of them or both of them attain old age with thee, say not "Fie" unto them nor repulse them, but speak unto them a gracious word.

وَاخْفِضْ لَهُمَا جَنَاحَ الذُّلِّ مِنَ الرَّحْمَةِ وَقُل رَّبِّ ارْحَمْهُمَا كَمَا رَبَّيَانِي صَغِيرًا {24}​
[Pickthal 17:24] And lower unto them the wing of submission through mercy, and say: My Lord! Have mercy on them both as they did care for me when I was little.
 
don532 said:
I have been taught the same....and am trying to teach my children the same by example.
Click to expand...

However, an interesting question I asked a Rabbi, was "what if your parents ask you to do something against the Torah, do you honor them?"

He repled "No." So you only honor them to so much.
 
So far all the answers are the virtually the same. Wouldn't it be fascinating to really compare the books of the major religions and see how many issues are the same. Does anyone know if this has been done and if so where can I read it?
 
Hey lavikor.


Can you provide the evidence from your sources?


Regards.
 
samah12 said:
So far all the answers are the virtually the same. Wouldn't it be fascinating to really compare the books of the major religions and see how many issues are the same. Does anyone know if this has been done and if so where can I read it?
Click to expand...

i believe zakir naik and ahmed deedat do this at length.


www.nadeem.lightuponlight.com , you can get it from there inshaAllah
 
I believe respect and obedience should be earned. Not all parents deserve it.
 
I can actually appreciate where he is coming from. People who have no guidelines to govern their lives don't observe their duties toward their children.. they conceive them out of wedlock, go on welfare and let them roam the streets... when their kids lock them in nursing homes in their old age, they wonder why the cruelty toward seniors. But People reap what they sow all along!
in Islam we cherish our elders, they are revered... and good religious persons observe their duties toward their kids and in turn their kids toward them.
 
PurestAmbrosia said:
I can actually appreciate where he is coming from. People who have no guidelines to govern their lives don't observe their duties toward their children.. they conceive them out of wedlock, go on welfare and let them roam the streets... when their kids lock them in nursing homes in their old age, they wonder why the cruelty toward seniors. But People reap what they sow all along!
in Islam we cherish our elders, they are revered... and good religious persons observe their duties toward their kids and in turn their kids toward them.
Click to expand...

i guess only a minority will truelly love and respect their parents even if their parents didnt do the same. This minority is successful and something great!
 
Fi_Sabilillah said:
Hey lavikor.


Can you provide the evidence from your sources?


Regards.
Click to expand...

Sure.

Honor your father and mother. You will then live long on the land that G-d your L-rd is giving you. (Exodus 20:12)

In the matter of honor due to parents, the father is mentioned first; in the matter of reverence due to them, the mother is mentioned first. From this we infer that both are to be equally honored and revered. Thus, whatever is said of one parent applies equally to the other parent. (Kerrithoth 28a)

The child-parent relationship is analogous to, and intricately bound up in, the man--G-d relationship. This is so because in bringing a child into this world the parents are in a partnership with G-d: the material substance is derived from the parents, while G-d grants spirit and soul, the vital form of man (Kidushin 30b, Nidah 31a)

If you honor [your parents], your days will be lengthened, and if not, they will be shortened. The words of the Torah are written briefly; they are explained by deriving the negative from the affirmative and the affirmative from the negative. — [from Mekhilta]

"'Ye shall fear every man his mother and his father, and ye shall keep my Sabbaths; I am the L-rd your G-d.' Scripture juxtaposes the observance of the Sabbath to the fear of one's father in order to teach you that 'although I admonish you regarding the fear of your father, yet if he bids you to desecrate the Sabbath do not listen to him [and the same is the case with any of the other commandments], for 'I am the L-rd your G-d' - both you and your father are equally bound in duty to honor Me. Do not, therefore, obey him if it results in disobeying My words.'" (Rashi on Leviticus 19:3, Yevamot 5b, Bava Metzia 32a)

Prohibitions include:
a) not to curse one's father or mother
b) no to smite one's father or mother
c) that a son shall not rebel against the authority of his father or mother
(Sefer Hamitzvot II:218, 219 and 195, and Hilchos Mamrim ch 5ff.)
 
IbnAbdulHakim said:
i guess only a minority will truelly love and respect their parents even if their parents didnt do the same. This minority is successful and something great!
Click to expand...

^^ I agree fully... and can give countless examples of miserable kaffir parents who have contributed nothing and yet were taken care of regardless by their revert children... my sister in law's mother comes to mind when I think of this..
:w:
 
IbnAbdulHakim said:
you mean conceiving a child isnt enough
Click to expand...

No, it isn't. Childbirth is painful, granted, but it isn't like the child had a choicein the matter. The child didn't agree to anything whatsoever, so no obligations should fall on the child.

Conceiving a child does not make that child your property, nor does it oblige the child to obey or respect you if you do nothing to earn that obedience and respect.

Parents who are abusive or neglectful should NOT be respected or obeyed. It it truly a shame when they are.
 
I think common sense can be used here too. Nobody is perfect, and there is no such thing as a perfect parent. I think we can all agree that there are certain parents out there who aren't worthy of honor or respect of any kind. However, if you focus on the average family situation that is without abuse or apathy, it becomes apparent what is meant by "honor they mother and father". If dad tells you to stop pulling your sister's hair and you tell dad to take a flying leap off the Golden Gate Bridge, that is unnecessary and a problem with the child, not the parent. There are a million example situations here, but the main thing is just basic respect for a parent, even if they arent "perfect" or they don't make you happy all the time.
 
:salamext:


The basic principle in islaam is that you are obedient to them so long as they don't make you do sin ^ so if ones parent said that one should pull their sisters hair, then they don't have to do that because 'there is no obedience to the creation if it involves disobedience to the Creator.' :)
 
Fi_Sabilillah said:
Can you provide the evidence from your sources?


Regards.
Click to expand...



Did you ever hear about the TEN COMMANDMENTS?!!!!!!!!!!!!

1. Belief in G-d
This category is derived from the declaration in Ex. 20:2 beginning, "I am the L-rd, your G-d..."

2. Prohibition of Improper Worship
This category is derived from Ex. 20:3-6, beginning, "You shall not have other gods..." It encompasses within it the prohibition against the worship of other gods as well as the prohibition of improper forms of worship of the one true G-d, such as worshiping G-d through an idol.

3. Prohibition of Oaths
This category is derived from Ex. 20:7, beginning, "You shall not take the name of the L-rd your G-d in vain..." This includes prohibitions against perjury, breaking or delaying the performance of vows or promises, and speaking G-d's name or swearing unnecessarily.
4. Observance of Sacred Times
This category is derived from Ex. 20:8-11, beginning, "Remember the sabbath day..." It encompasses all mitzvot related to shabbat, holidays, or other sacred time.

5. Respect for Parents and Teachers
This category is derived from Ex. 20:12, beginning, "Honor your father and mother..."

6. Prohibition of Physically Harming a Person
This category is derived from Ex. 20:13, saying, "You shall not murder."

7. Prohibition of Sexual Immorality
This category is derived from Ex. 20:13, saying, "You shall not commit adultery."

8. Prohibition of Theft
This category is derived from Ex. 20:13, saying, "You shall not steal." It includes within it both outright robbery as well as various forms of theft by deception and unethical business practices. It also includes kidnapping, which is essentially "stealing" a person.

9. Prohibition of Harming a Person through Speech
This category is derived from Ex. 20:13, saying, "You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor." It includes all forms of lashon ha-ra (sins relating to speech).

10. Prohibition of Coveting
This category is derived from Ex. 20:14, beginning, "You shall not covet your neighbor's house..."
 

Similar Threads

Back
Top