I see you are unable to answer the question which was: is the Prophet's prophet's example with Aisha a good one, one to be followed and honoured and secondly, what impact on the rights of woman and the responsibility of parents towards their children does a story like that have?
the question was answered here:
-here and again here I really can't help it if you have a comprehension impediment.. which part of
This is a misunderstanding of Islamic law. Actions which the Prophet did do not automatically become part of the religion unless he recommended them, in which case they become Sunnah. Riding a camel is not considered part of the religion, for example.
Also, the Prophet pbuh normally married women much older than A'isha, so why would the exception and not the norm become the tradition to be followed?
was difficult for you to understand?
This is a matter of personal discretion. If I marry as 63 year old man and I am a good 30 years younger than he, is there really an impact of this on anyone else other than my person? sure you can sit and judge he is a sugar daddy she is a gold digger but outside of the mediocre gossip like snicker does this impact anyone else, and if it does in which ways exactly?
Alternatively, are you saying that no lessons are drawn or can be drawn from this story, it had no impact on Islamic law, it is a one-off and only of historical interest?
I don't think it has a historical interest when it comes to their age and certainly no impact on the law. I had an aunt who married at 42 and a cousin who married at 16.. let me know which one of those should be the law if we are to follow your tract of thought? both of them are practicing Muslims and so are their husbands!
It seems to me that if one accepts it as an example to follow then what are you legitimising?
I have no idea what this means? you want to create a scenario and to create a theme based on that? Is there anything factual as far as Islamic jurisprudence is concerned with your above statement?
If you accept that a parent can offer up their children without a thought for their emotional well being then what kind of family trust are you creating?
A parent can't offer a child, haven't you come across this?
Al-Khansaa’ bint Khidaam complained to the Prophet that her father wanted her to marry someone she didn’t want, saying “I do not wish to accept what my father has arranged.” The Prophet said, “Then this marriage is invalid, go and marry whomever you wish.” Al-Khansaa’ said, “I have actually accepted what my father has arranged, but I wanted women to know that fathers have no right in their daughter’s matters” (i.e. they have no right to force a marriage on them). (Fath Al-Barî Ibn Hajr, Sunan Ibn Mâjah)
I know I have posted the above to your person more than once, then why do you keep asking for implications when there are none as far as Islam is concerned, are you that desperate for validation?
plus the conditions of marriage met:
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]The Different Types of Shuroot (Conditions or Prerequisites)[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]At this point, we need to learn the definition of some general terms in Islamic
fiqh which come up in many subject areas, including the one at hand.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]
Sahih (Sound). A contract which fulfills all of the
arkaan and the
shuroot and has full effect in the law.
Baatil (Void). A contract that has failed to fulfill specific
arkaan or vital
shuroot. A contract which is
baatil is the opposite of one which is
sahih and has no legal effect at all. If a marriage contract is found to be void, even if it is only discovered after consummation, the legal condition will be as if it never happened at all. The lineage of the father will not be established and there is no waiting period (
'iddah) upon the woman. An example of this would be if a man married a woman who was married to someone else at the time.
Faasid (Defective). This is a contract which fails to fulfill some of the
shuroot, but not the
arkaan. For non-Hanafis,
faasid and
baatil have the same meaning. In Hanafi fiqh, a marriage which was
faasid has some legal ramifications, especially if it was consummated. [/FONT] [FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]With respect to marriage, there are four different kinds of conditions which must be met:[/FONT]
- [FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica][/FONT][FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]
- Conditions Required for Initiating the Contract (shuroot al-in'iqaad). These are the conditions that must be present with respect to the arkaan or fundamentals of the marriage contract.
- Conditions Required for the Soundness of the Contract (shuroot as-sihha). These are conditions which must be fulfilled in order for the marriage to have its proper legal effect. If these conditions are not met, the contract is "defective" (faasid), according to Hanafi fiqh, "void" (baatil) according to the others.
- Conditions Required for the Execution of the Contract (shuroot an-nifaadh). These are conditions which must be met for the marriage to have actual practical effect. If these conditions are not met, then the marriage is "suspended" (mauqoof) according to Hanafi and Maliki fiqh. For example, a minor girl until she reaches puberty.
- Conditions Required for Making the Marriage Binding (shuroot al-luzoom). If these conditions are not met, then the marriage is non-binding meaning that either of the two parties or others may have the right to anull the marriage. If they accept the marriage with such shortcomings, it becomes binding.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]First: Shuroot Required for Initiating the Contract[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]In this category, there are conditions concerning the two who are getting married as well as the form in which the contract takes place.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Concerning the Two Getting Married[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]The two people must meet the qualification of legal competence, i.e, they must be adult and sane. If they are not, the marriage will be invalid.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Secondly, the woman cannot be from those categories of women that are forbidden for a man to marry. For example, suppose a man married a woman and later discovered that they had been breastfed by the same woman. In this case, it is as if the marriage never took place because those two were not qualified or allowed to marry each other and the marriage becomes null and void.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Concerning the Contract[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]There is near complete agreement on the following conditions relating to the transaction of the marriage contract:[/FONT]
- [FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica][/FONT][FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]
- The offer and acceptance must be done in one sitting. In general, this means that the response must be immediate. Exactly what is considered a "sitting" depends on custom and related factors.
- The acceptance must correspond to what is being offered. If the guardian says: "I marry you to Khadijah", a response of "I accept Fatimah as my wife" would not constitute a valid contract. An exception to this is if the wali mentions a specific dowry amount and the groom responds with a higher amount. It is regarded that there is no reason for dispute since it is assumed that a higher dowry will be acceptable.
- The wali cannot rescind the offer. Unlike transactions of selling, neither party can say "I have changed my mind" once they have uttered the offer/acceptance. It is immediately binding. In a sale, they both continue to have the option to change their mind until the "sitting" is over and they part.
- The marriage must be effective immediately. If the wali says "I will marry her to you after one month", there is not marriage and the two remain unmarried.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Note that the custom of saying "I accept" three times common in some Muslim cultures has no legal significance. Once the first "I accept" has been uttered, everything after that is meaningless - whether positive or negative.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Adding Stipulations to the Marriage Contract[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]This is where one party states a stipulation binding on the other party for specific reasons or goals. The offer/acceptance are tied to this stipulation by mention. There is a difference of opinion among the scholars concerning the validity of conditions of this nature.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Conditions of contracts are two types: 1) those imposed directly by the
shari'a and 2) those drawn up by one or more of the parties. When any contract is entered into, the first type of conditions are covered automatically even if they are not stated in the contract.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Understood Conditions Based on what is Customary[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]It is a general principle in
fiqh that customs can take the status of law. It becomes understood that people are going to behave in a certain fashion. Since that is understood, one party has the right to ask it of the other even if it is not stated in the contract. In the area of marriage, there are some stipulations that are known by custom. These do not have to be mentioned in the contract to be considered binding. However, there are some strict conditions that must be met before a customary act is considered something equivalent to a legal stipulation. These conditions are as follows:[/FONT]
- [FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica][/FONT][FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]
- The customary practice cannot contravene or contradict anything expressly laid down by the shari'a. For example, it is custom in some parts of the world for the woman to pay dowry to the man. In other parts, it is customary to prepare two or three times amount of food that the guests could possibly eat at the walima (wedding feast). Neither party has the right to demand of the other the fulfillment of such customs.
- The customary act must be common, well-known and universal and not something practiced only by some portions of the population.
- The custom must have been in existence and known before the marriage contract took place.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Other conditions Laid Down by the Two Parties[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Any condition which contradicts, compromises or nullifies the main goals and purposes of the marriage contract itself are rejected and, even if stated, are of no legal consequence. For example conditions which state that the woman receives no dowry or that he does not have to support her or that they will not consummate the marriage are all null and void and of no effect whatsoever.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Such conditions must be stipulated and agreed upon at or before the time of the offer/acceptance. Even those scholars who accept such stipulations do not accept them if they are made after the offer/acceptance.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Sound and Acceptable Stipulations[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]There are two types of sound and acceptable stipulations:[/FONT]
- [FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica][/FONT][FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]
- Those embodied in the contract even if they are not stated. This includes conditions known from the shari'a as well as those known from custom as discussed previously. The Prophet (sas) said:
"Ahaqqu maa aufaitum min ash-shurooti maa istahlaltum bihi al-furooj."
"The conditions which you have the most duty to fulfill are those by which you have made marital relations lawful." Bukhari & Muslim
Many scholars understand this hadith to be referring to these kinds of conditions only, that is, those that are covered by the shari'a in the first place. This is the view of the shafi'i school. They do no allow any additional stipulations to be added to the marriage contract.
- Those conditions not covered by the essential nature of the contract but which are agreed upon by the contracting parties. These are those stipulations that do not contradict the general goals of the contract, do not bring harm to anyone and which apply to things which are permissible and within the right of the person to agree - that is something that does not go against the shari'a. They are laid out in the beginning to avoid any conflict or hardship in the future.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]In General, Muslims Must Fulfill Their Agreements[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Generally speaking, Muslims must comply with any agreements that they make. Allah said about the believers:[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]{...Wa al-moofoona fi 'ahdihim idhaa 'aahadoo...}
{...And those who fulfill their pacts when they make one...} Al-Baqara:177[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]{Yaa ayyuhaa alladhina aamanoo aufoo bi al-'uqood...}
{O you who believe fulfill your contracts...} Al-Ma'idah:1[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]The Prophet (sas) said:[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]"Al-muslimoona 'alaa shurootihim."
"Muslims are bound by their stipulations." Abu Daud & Al-Hakim (sahih)[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]During the time of Umar ibn Al-Khattab, a man married a woman upon the condition that he would not move her from his house. The time came when he wanted to move her. They took their dispute to Umar and he said: "She has the right to her stipulation." The man said, "In that case, they will certainly end the marriage." He said, "The rights are broken off due to the stipulations." This was the view of many of the Companions, Followers and scholars including Saad ibn Abi Waqqas, Mu'awiyah, Amr ibn Al-Aas, Shuraih, Umar ibn Abdul Aziz, Tawoos, Al-Awzaa'i and Ishaq.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]There is another opinion which says that external stipulations - those not covered by the nature of the contract itself - carry no weight and need not be met. This was the opinion of Abu Hanifa, Ash-Shafi'i, Malik, Az-Zuhri, Qatada, Al-Laith, Ath-Thauri, Ibn Al-Mundhir and has been narrated from Ali.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]The Proofs of Those Who Say that Such Stipulations are Neither Binding nor Valid[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]"Kullu shartin laisa fiy kitaabi Allahi fahuwa baatil wa in kaana mi'atu shartin."
"Every stipultion which is not in the book of Allah is void even if it be one hundred stipulations." Muslim & Bukhari[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]They also cite the following extension to the hadith mentioned earlier about stipulations:[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]"Al-Muslimoon 'alaa shurootihim illa shartin ahalla haraaman au harrama halaalan."
"Muslims are bound by their stipulations except for a stipulation which makes the unlawful lawful or makes the lawful unlawful."[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]However, this version of the hadith with the added sentence is weak and cannot be used as evidence. As for the hadith mentioned earlier that "
The conditions which you have the most duty to fulfill are those by which you have made marital relations lawful.", they claim that this only applies to the conditions which are essential parts of the nature of the contract itself.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Response to Those Arguments[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]The scholars who permit such stipulations in the marriage contract have responded to the above. As for the hadith "
Every stipulations which is not in the book of Allah...", they say that for a woman's
wali to make some conditions to her advantage is something permissible and does not go against the Book of Allah.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Actually, such conditions do not violate the Book of Allah and do not make anything forbidden permissible, etc. They simply give the woman the right to annul the marriage if the condition is not satisfied.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Also, there remains no real meaning to the hadith "
The conditions which you have the most duty to fulfill..." if one says that it only applies to conditions that are already in force due to the nature of the contract anyway.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]The Crux of this Difference of Opinion[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]This discussion boils down to the understanding of two seemingly contradictory hadith:[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]"Every stipulation which is not in the book of Allah is void even if it be one hundred stipulations." Muslim & Bukhari[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]"The conditions which you have the most duty to fulfill are those by which you have made marital relations lawful." Bukhari & Muslim[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]It seems clear from the second hadith along with the fatwa of Umar mentioned earlier that there is some room for adding stipulations to a marriage contract. It also seems clear from the first hadith that there are limits on what can be stipulated. Specifically, any stipulations which go against the basic goals and principles of the marriage contract and not allowed and, if stated, are null and void. Thus, the only remaining problem is understanding exactly how this principle applies in practical situations.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]For those scholars who don't accept such external stipulations at all, they have no effect, are not binding, and don't affect the validity of the underlying contract. For those who accept them, they give the woman the option to annul the marriage upon he request if the condition is violated. We only mention the woman because the man can divorce at any time with or without a particular cause and so has no need of such an option. Notice that even in the fatwa of Umar, he didn't require the man to fulfill the condition, rather he allowed that she could end the marriage if she so demanded.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Conditions for Which there is Agreement that they are Invalid[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Even those who accept these stipulations all agree that certain conditions are not allowed. Among them are the following:[/FONT]
- [FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica][/FONT][FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]
- Nikaah Ash-Shighaar. This is where the two dowries are stolen and "exchanged". For example a man marries his son to another's daughter in "exchange" for the other marrying his daughter to the first one's son. Neither woman receives their dowry.
- Nikaah Al-Mut'a. Any kind of marriage with a stipulated time limit.
- Nikaah At-Tahleel. A woman who has been divorced three times and wishes to return to her first husband marries a man on the condition that he divorce her. If this is discovered or if this is her intention, the first husband still does not become lawful for her in spite of this marriage.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]Second: Conditions for the Soundness of a Marriage Contract[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]There are ten conditions (
shuroot) in this category. Some are agreed upon by virtually all the scholars while others are the subject of some disagreement.[/FONT]
[FONT=trebuchet ms, arial, helvetica]
The woman is permissible to the man.
i.e., that she is not one of those forbidden to him by relation, nursing or other existing and conflicting marriage. Some would consider this on of the
arkaan (pillars) or one of the conditions for initiating the contract. In any case, this condition must definitely be met.
The offer and acceptance is of a permanent nature and not temporary.
All forms of temporary marriage are forbidden in Islam. If anything stated in the offer and acceptance indicates a temporary nature, the marriage is not valid.
Two non-discredited witnesses.
There is some difference of opinion on this issue, but in the final analysis, the hadith is clear.
Ibn Taimia mentioned four existing opinions on this issue:
(1) The marriage must be announced and made public, regardless of whether the contract was actually witnessed or not. This was the opinion of Malik as well as the scholars of hadith, the Dhaahiris and one opinion reported from Ahamd.
(2) It is obligatory to have witnesses, regardless of whether the marriage contract is made public or not. This was the view of Abu Hanifah, Ash-Shafi'iy and another opinion reported from Ahmad.
(3) Both witnesses and a public announcement are necessary. This is a third narration from Ahmad.
(4) Either one of the two is necessary. This is a fourth narration from Ahmad.
Ibn Taimia himself felt that the second opinion (only witnesses required) is weak. He claimed that there was no authentic source for same and that it was not widely known among the Muslims. Instead, what is required is the public pronouncement letting the people know that the parties got married. He says that if a marriage takes place without witnesses or public announcement it is definitely invalid, if it takes place with witnesses but no announcement it is questionable and if it takes place with both it is definitely valid.
The portion of Ibn Taimia's opinion which finds the witnesses NOT a requirement must be rejected, because the hadith on this subject has been found to be sahih:
"Laa nikaaha illa bi waliyin wa shaahidaiy 'adlin"
"No marriage except with a guardian and two non-discredited witnesses."
So the bottom line here is that BOTH the witnesses AND the public announcement are required. In fact, regarding public announcement, the Maliki school says that if the other parties ask the witnesses to keep it silent that the marriage is not valid and the two are to be separated - PERMANENTLY! The Hanbali school holds that such a marriage is not invalid although it is disliked to do so. The witnesses must be two adult and sane Muslim men whose testimony has not been previously discredited.
Both parties to the contract and the bride have willingly accepted the marriage.
The Hanafis say that this is not a condition, but their position is unacceptable and rejected because of ample evidence from the Qur'an and the Sunnah to the contrary. In the
jahiliya, Arabs used to "inherit" (i.e., forcibly marry) their brothers wives if they died. Allah forbid this saying:
{Yaa ayyuhaa alladhina aamanoo, laa yahillu lakum an tarithoo an-nisaa'a karhan...}
{O, you who believe, it is not lawful for you to inherit women against their will...} An-Nisaa:19
[/FONT]
Non-abridged full source here 
