I have a fear of heights and tend to detest those ferris wheels... I went on one with my aunt, it was one of the tallest I'd ever been on, when I was younger I used to love these sorts of rides anyhow on that one in particular I just thought I'd pass out the entire time I'd look down and get so dizzy and nauseous, I could tell my aunt wasn't enjoying herself either though she didn't profess it. when I put my arm around her all her tensed muscles relaxed, I wondered why we got on that thing? or what possessed us both? as it seemed to linger up there forever it was tortuous as when someone reached the bottom they would load a new couple... I think if I had any govt secrets I'd have probably confessed them just to get off.
The second phobia which doesn't always happen, and I am not sure I can classify it as a phobia, is sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night gasping for air, like someone is choking me... and this is really odd, because I remember the day when it first happened... when I lived in the dorms in grad school, we were living next to a cemetery lol, that is where they put all the grad students but I digress, anyhow (it was an all girls dorm) so don't come bug me about it, but that too is besides, one of the girls on the floor was really fond of "Ouija boards" on a budget and I say that because she used to carve one herself and make the letters out of paper, anyhow she felt it really opportune that we were a block away from this cemetery for sure something was bound to show, I never really took her seriously, I thought the whole thing was hilarious--but that night, I just felt something really heavy in the air as she was in the midst of her game-- my best friend just went to her room because she actually believed in that sort of stuff and didn't want to partake in it, as this girl was in midst of ceremony, I was bemused and standing by the fridge (making me a jam sandwich and cutting off the edges, I remember because I thought what transpired later must have been something I ate) in the midst of their seance I saw their arms move, I don't know if they were faking answers and movements but I did see hers and the other 2 participants arms move while they were assuming that grave querying voice-- anyhow later that evening, and I swear to God this happened I couldn't explain it but sometime around two or three in the morning, I was sleeping on my side I felt something behind me, coming closer and it started choking me, with a hand or pillow on my face, and I thought it was my flat mates playing a joke on me in light of the event-- and I was really irritated because it started off light and then I really couldn't breathe, I was in between sleeping and wakefulness anyhow I woke up and it was pitch dark, I was shuddering, I turned on the light and looked around, there was nothing, and my door was locked so there was absolutely no body there, I got out and kept knocking at my friend's door, lol she came out with her head all tied with her night treatment and her those clip on braces and was really crusty from sleep, and I accused her of trying to choke me, but I can clearly see she had nothing to do with it, I was gasping for air and I wanted her to stop breathing so I can suck in all the available air... anyhow from that day onward, on certain random nights I wake up in that exact state again, like something is choking me and I can't breathe, which is really a conundrum to me, so I try to regulate my breathing and take a glass of water, I imagine I am just respiratory depressed and acidotic -- well I intellectualize what happens as a form of respiratory depression, which obviously would trigger wakefulness and breathing when oxygen levels are at a low, but I can't explain however why it never happened prior to that night ... so to make a tediously long story short, that is if you have made it so far? lol
my two phobias are heights
and forgetting how to breathe while sleeping
