...I has a question to ask.
You know when you do Istikharah you ask Allah to make things easier for you and facilitate it..And if its bad for you for Him to take it away from you etc.....Well sometimes when it comes to marriage, things can be difficult...You can face obstacles....So do you automatically come to the conclusion that these are obstacles that Allah
has placed in your way, or do you think that this is one more thorn on the road of life, something that has been placed there for you to overcome. For people will always fight for the things they really want right? Thats what makes attainting it so much more sweeter at the end...Bi'ithnillah.
So yeah...Did the Question make sense?
Sis, my mum is looking for a potential spouse for my eldest brother. I used to pray for my bro in this regard (and still do) and it occurred to me in my dua that perhaps I should pray for myself too, not that I was actively looking for a spouse and so I did.
Wallahi, one of the photos my mum had sent to a certain family in order for my bros marriage also had me in the picture and guess what? The family (May Allah bless them) for some reason were so impressed by me and my demeanor (their eldest daughter had visited our home before with her husband) that they proposed if I would like to marry their youngest daughter. I am an extremely shy person in real life and when my parents took me to see the other families daughter my sweet mum didn't tell me it was for me and all the while I was under the impression it was for my eldest brother. Out of my shyness when asked to look at her I only did so for about half a second and Wallahi, her face was shining like the full moon, no joke. It had this beautiful radiant aura (hard to explain...) when I looked at her it was as though I knew her like I knew the back of my hand, a very very strange feeling.
So I prayed Isthikhara, and even though I asked Allah (swt) to grant me what was best for me in my hereafter and in this life, my heart was really inclined towards the proposal. Thats when certain things happened that made me and my mum concerned perhaps that this wouldn't happen but it's also when I realized even though I'd been praying isthikhara, I had also been praying to Allah (swt) to grant me this proposal(not gonna lie) and I realized the fallacy in my dua.
We must have patience and place our trust completely in Allah (swt). If Allah (swt) wills it then nothing in the entire existence can stop it from happening and if Allah (swt) will it not to be so, then nor you nor anyone could make it happen. We must have patience that if it doesn't happen then Allah (swt) has something better in store for us.
I read an ayah a long while back which meant none of you can attain piety until you sacrifice in the way of Allah that which you love. I used to pray to Allah (swt) (still do) to enable me to sacrifice my very core of existence for the sake of Allah(swt). But Allah (swt) knows us better than we know ourselves... subhanAllah.
The heart is so naive and childish, I used to think if I died a martyr (when I was a teen *cough*cough*) then I'll get the hooor-al-ayn but then I heard the Muslimahs of this world will be much much more beautiful than the hoors and I started thinking but who would marry me lol. SubhanAllah, when the divine decree of Allah (swt) comes to pass even a person like me is able to marry the best of women (muslim women). But now I love Allah (swt) far more than I could ever love any woman lol.
Sorry for the long post, hope I answered though through my experiences (and failures) that humans can be deceiving, we never know whom we might end up marrying (people change after marriage, just look at all the single mothers), but we can always, always trust in Allah (swt).
Aaaand with that I'm gone, sorry again for the long post, sis.
