When to stay persistent in dua and when to give up

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Studentofdeed

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so when we make dua...they say we should not give up. However how do we know if we should keep making dua or just to leave to Allah. Unfortunately I'm not patient so as Allah please give me response because im impatient. If it is yes then Alhamdullah then if its no i will still thank you and say Alhamdullah. However why is it rather than giving us immediate response, is the response sometimes dragged out? It really makes us desperate and painful. The result can either but extreme gratitude or total grief. Obviously I know whatever happens is good. But I'm asking about why the long time or when one should get an idea of something not happening. Unfortunately sometimes when I make dua and do not get any response I interrpret that I may not get that specific thing. Can someone share their thoughts and ideas?

I'm asking because I'm making dua for something, however the wait is making me desperate and really anxious. I'm desperately begging Allah and feel very weak.
 
Studentofdeed said:
so when we make dua...they say we should not give up. However how do we know if we should keep making dua or just to leave to Allah. Unfortunately I'm not patient so as Allah please give me response because im impatient. If it is yes then Alhamdullah then if its no i will still thank you and say Alhamdullah. However why is it rather than giving us immediate response, is the response sometimes dragged out? It really makes us desperate and painful. The result can either but extreme gratitude or total grief. Obviously I know whatever happens is good. But I'm asking about why the long time or when one should get an idea of something not happening. Unfortunately sometimes when I make dua and do not get any response I interrpret that I may not get that specific thing. Can someone share their thoughts and ideas?

I'm asking because I'm making dua for something, however the wait is making me desperate and really anxious. I'm desperately begging Allah and feel very weak.
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Same here, you all know what's been goin on my end.....

I've been told to pray pray and pray which I do and cathartically it helps but the same dua over and over again for years and years...and I wait for ease.... I pray because I hope one day my issues will be solved... I will never know what that one day is 'in advance...', this is what drives me to ask for help everyday. I will definetely pray everyday for all my needs until my last hour because I know what awaits me. I suppose one might say that is selfish.... one is praying only when they need something.

Everyone needs something when they reach a certain age and everyone prays for it, dont they? I did from my early teens...

The idea of constant dua keeps hope and faith afloat but the body, soul and heart 'empties' as time goes on and the longer 'what you have asked for' is delayed.

I pray to Allah swt not to test us any further... I tell him about my emptiness, my lack of faith in humanity as it fails in a spiralling manner, I cry about the idea or the flame of hope fading, I ask for rescue one last time, I will never make stupid mistakes again.

I am not the same guy I was 3 years ago. Wish I could turn back time.

[MENTION=43429]Studentofdeed[/MENTION] you just have to accept what you are going through and what's coming to you. Yeah theres depressing times. You have to stay strong, even when you are feeling weak like even at nano level, your subconscious and your psyche never fails to remember Allah swt, dont you always remember to do some form of zikr or invoke duas from quran... I do and I'm used to it.

I see it as a long journey purely because of my issues lasting this long... I've had other issues in the past (not so bad as current) that have lasted longer but eventually some relief came.

If you like this world then you want to live in it for longer and you want all the good, all the contentment, all the peace, success and fruits of life. The more you want it the more you open yourself up to face likelihood of disappointments. But still you never know the bounties Allah swt can give you... pray for increase in your rizk, baraka and hikma.... very valuable.

We can only wait for blessings and sometimes you have to strive to do your bit to try and get them, if Allah swt permits then you'll get it insh Allah.

Sabr is not finite in this world or in your life. You may have to exercise Sabr until your last hour. For all those suffering and going through their own mental storm,
May Allah swt make it easy to handle the burden of tests being presented to them from Allah swt and only Allah swt.

Please remember me and my family in your prayers...

Allah swt knows what he is doing. No doubt or question about it.

I cant wait to get out of my predicament.

I cant wait to travel to Saudi Arabia again, this time it will be even more spiritual insh Allah....
 
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So we should immediately assume if I don't get what I ask for to assume I won't get it then? Then why not just make one dua...why are we told to make persistent dua if its not getting accepted or response. Yes Allah responds but in his own way, but im saying if the thing specific we want. We don't get, then why make persistent dua. Because the more dua I make, the more vulnerable and useless I feel

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not being ungrateful or anything. Allah is most wise and he knows whats best. I'm simply asking for the wisdom and understanding so I can wrap my brain around it
 
Assalam O Alaikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuhu,

The answer is within your own post - Allah Knows what we don't know & Allah is Most Wise.
Perhaps one thing Allah does want to teach us is to exercise patience and trust in Him. Allah will definitely give you what is best for you, perhaps what you are asking for is something which is not the best for you at this time. Perhaps this is not the right time for you to have that thing. Who knows about this other than Allah and if you simply put your trust in Him and keep asking, it will only help you to be more patient and be more humble In Sha'a Allah.

Allah says in the Quran 2:216
But perhaps you hate a thing and it is good for you; and perhaps you love a thing and it is bad for you. And Allah Knows, while you know not. [Quran 2:216]
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I will quote two hadiths and hope after reading those who can get a better picture. If not I can explain those hadith in my later posts.

Abu Sa'id al-Khudri reported that the Prophet, may Allah bless him and grant him peace, said, "No Muslim makes supplication - unless he is someone who has cut off his relatives - but that he is given one of three things:

  1. either his supplication is answered quickly,
  2. or it is stored up for him in the Next World,
  3. or an evil equal to it is averted from him."
It was said, "Then many supplications will be made." He replied, "Allah has more still to give."
‏
Grade: Sahih (Al-Albani)
Sunnah.com reference: Book 1, Hadith 107
English reference: Book 31, Hadith 710
Arabic reference: Book 1, Hadith 710
http://sunnah.com/adab/31/107
Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported:
The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ), "The supplication of every one of you will be granted if he does not get impatient and say (for example): 'I supplicated my Rubb but my prayer has not been granted'."

[Al-Bukhari and Muslim].

The narration of Muslim is: "The supplication of a slave continues to be granted as long as he does not supplicate for a sinful thing or for something that would cut off the ties of kinship and he does not grow impatient." It was said: "O Messenger of Allah! What does growing impatient mean?" He (ﷺ) said, "It is one's saying: 'I supplicated again and again but I do not think that my prayer will be answered.' Then he becomes frustrated (in such circumstances) and gives up supplication altogether."‏

Reference: Riyad as-Salihin 1499
In-book reference: Book 16, Hadith 35
English translation: Book 16, Hadith 1499
https://sunnah.com/riyadussaliheen/16/35
 
This life is a test. If there is something you desperately need, it is obvious you should work for it.
 
Studentofdeed said:
So we should immediately assume if I don't get what I ask for to assume I won't get it then? Then why not just make one dua...why are we told to make persistent dua if its not getting accepted or response. Yes Allah responds but in his own way, but im saying if the thing specific we want. We don't get, then why make persistent dua. Because the more dua I make, the more vulnerable and useless I feel

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not being ungrateful or anything. Allah is most wise and he knows whats best. I'm simply asking for the wisdom and understanding so I can wrap my brain around it
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I feel the same way....
As bad situations are prolonged, I mean in my case on occasions something nudges me very very briefly to give up and then the thought of giving up quickly vanishes again. It may be human nature, it may just be a mental reflex. However it is pushed away shortly after. I guess our belief has to remain strong no matter what. It is a sad life for those going through hardship.

I am not giving up on my religion, my beliefs, my god conscience for anything but pray that Allah swt guides us all.

Depends on what you are praying for.... are there better alternatives? Realistically is it meant to be. Only Allah swt knows.

When to give up and when to persist is a rational choice you have to make. If you really want something and it is even remotely possible and halal.. an imams response would be to be patient and pray and consider other options.

I could be wrong. Maybe someone can give a better response using references to quran and hadith?

May help me too. I mean I suffer oppression merely because I am standing firm in justice, being patient and trying to do the right thing. Putting family in danger is definetely not the right thing.
 
Assalamualaikum
I think we should be persistent,no matter what. So it's the second time I am giving this example. My family has been making Dua for something for like 10-15 years. And it's not accepted yet. All the conditions of making Dua are being fulfilled, still we aren't getting it. But I guess,. It's very close now.If we get it, it's good. If we don't,we're gonna get its reward in the hereafter. Win-win situation.
May Allah grant everyone of you ease. Ameen!
 
But why put the believer in suffering and agony. He stays persistent only for Allah not to give that exact thing. Isn't that tortuous?

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I don't understand why is the world designed to be difficult for believers and heaven for the evil people. What is the wisdom of that?
 
Studentofdeed said:
the world designed to be difficult for believers and heaven for the evil people. What is the wisdom of that?
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You have stated a Hadith here which is "This world is a prison for a believer and heaven for a disbeliever." After all, this world means 'low', and a believer doesn't like lowly things :)

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Studentofdeed said:
Allah is most wise and he knows whats best.
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Your answer is in these very lines.
 
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Studentofdeed said:
But why put the believer in suffering and agony. He stays persistent only for Allah not to give that exact thing. Isn't that tortuous?

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I don't understand why is the world designed to be difficult for believers and heaven for the evil people. What is the wisdom of that?
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2:200 "So when ye have accomplished your holy rites, celebrate the praises of Allah, as ye used to celebrate the praises of your fathers,- yea, with far more Heart and soul. There are men who say: "Our Lord! Give us (Thy bounties) in this world!" but they will have no portion in the Hereafter."

From the tafser of Kashani:

https://quranx.com/tafsirs/2.200

"(...)There are some people who say, 'Our Lord, [give to us in this world]', in other words, they only demand the things of this world and occupy themselves solely with remembrance of them and only worship God for the sake of [securing] these; such people will have no part in the Hereafter, since his orienting of himself towards the lowly prevents him from receiving the nobler because his aspirations never rise to the latter and [because of] the acquisition of the darkness that precludes [the acquisition of] light."
 
Watch this vid. You will find relief. If you have memorized this surah, it will hit in a pretty nice way. But if you haven't,memorize it soon. And don't think it is just for prophet(peace be upon him), it is addressing us as well. Allah already knew about the future and Quran is a miracle, so the surahs are for us as well in a way or the other. So just think that Allah is addressing you here.
https://youtu.be/KoqhNz7wD3I

[TABLE="class: grid, width: 100%, align: center"]
[TR][TD]YouTube
Ever feel disconnected with Allah, feel down, feel depressed or think maybe Allah doesn't love you anymore... feel like your duas are not being answered?? Wa......[/TD][/TR][/TABLE]
 
Greetings and peace be with you Studentofdeed;

But why put the believer in suffering and agony.
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My reply is not intended to beat you down, rather it is to help you find resilience, perseverance and above all hope in Allah who cares for all his creation.

Looking back over my last seventy one years, I don't think this suffering ever stops. My working life was a grind, married life is a continuous struggle, family life bring a fair amount of grief, the problems in life are like going through a minefield. Somehow you have to find the strength to weather the storms of life and go from your age to my age, and still find ways to be at peace with yourself and with Allah; despite all the turmoil thrown your way.

May Allah bless you with the wisdom, strength, resilience, perseverance and the kindness to do his will,

Eric
 
Jazakallah Khayran may Allah bless you all. That was a moment of weakness but alhamdullah im better now
 

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