" Fires shots " : ) Dont worry, I completely agree with you here, so i wont kill you : p. Most of the time this is the reason why girls don't find the courage to cover up in front of strange males, since its a part of their nature to get some sort of appreciation to feel good about themselves and when that appreciation lacks at home, they seek it outside. This thing is very common where I live and I am a bit too familiar with it, but sadly king of nines, ours is a male chauvinist culture( and chauvinism is not Islamic, not that i know of at least), men mostly defend their chauvinism by twisting religious interpretations, and most women ; ironically their mothers, grandmothers etc highly SUPPORT their chauvinism when, obviously it is shown to the wifes and daughters ( to maintain their dominance since ours is mostly a joint family system where 2,3,4 brothers, married with their families might need to live together to share expenses).
Then comes the double standards that are attached with chauvinism, clearly un-islamic, where some men go out and about with females, have fun, and then discard such girls to settle down for 'decent pious girls, since out-going girls are not considered good home makers, aren't doormats. And It is despicable that these very men keep a very close eye on their own sisters, restrict their movements, and yet they ruin the sisters of other brothers, and the saddest part of this dilemma is their parents supporting their sons, calling the behaviour ' innocent mistakes' and 'men can get away with it' kind of statements, but at the same time not withstanding any such mistake from females and going extremely harsh with them if anyone found involved in such a thing.
Anyhow, there's little women are left with to do about it than just be patient, they still have to be the strong ones, and they are taught Not to expect any sort of emotional support from the males members of the family , though this is very un-Islamic, but this culture has taken deep roots in some muslim societies. And the reason for that can easily be explained by male dominance, lack of religious education for both men and women, religious sermons from people who are not scholars, and such pseudo scholars mostly emphasizing on the duties of women in the mans life but never on the man's role in the women's life, so there we have a very big problem which has strong links to the male ego. But since there are people in this world who are raised without parents, one can only blame them just about that much, ofcourse we must strive to improve this state of affairs but if unfortunately faced with this situation, One can pray to Allah swt for things to change for the better,and make our eeman strong so that we don't fall in traps to our emotional weaknesses.
So yes you're very right and I wish muslim men would understand how important it is for them to bond with their daughters , wives, and sisters. I see very few girls who are close to their fathers, and I must say they have a very strong personality, are very self assured. And girls who have their fathers/brothers keeping a very safe distance from them, treating them as only some women in the house who are there to serve our needs, have un-stable , weak personalities and they seek to affirm their emotional worth outside their homes by not covering, trying to attract attention or any other activity. Others who do not cover are those who belong to liberal families where religion is used only as a prayer/ ritual when a person is born, married, and dies. May we all be guided to the right path and may we be saved from the tricks of satan and hell fire, ameen.
I also heard a very nice lecture i'll link it up here. It instructs men to be really gentle with women while telling them of the commandment from Allah swt, and also assert the fact that they ask of women to do so and so not because they want it, but because it is Allah swt who requires it from them. It is a very nice lecture from one of my favorite scholars.
youtube.com/watch?v=ThuJnzvQqcg
hence where I live, most muslim women do not feel the motivation to cover themselves up because men always seem to prefer girls who they find pretty, and prettily dressed up, things are very slowly changing though but very slow )
