Wife Beating in Islam?

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A`udhu Billahi mina Shaytanir Rajeem,

Bismillahir Rahmanir Raheem

Assalamu 'alaykum,

to add, albeit nervously, a different perspective: there are/were times and places, like waaay back in the 8th Century CE that it was permissable for a man to marry women as young as, well...REAL young, pre-teenage-ish. i tend to think that we are talking about a mild slap to the bottom MORE than anything and only as an "i'm real serious" type or "you better NOT do that again" manner.

IF i remember correctly, and MAYBE it's just old age, but i either read or heard that A'isha(ra) was the recipient on one,JUST one of these. i've scanned one of the books i just finished and didn't see it there, it might be in another or maybe it was in one of the lectures that i heard.

it kinda sorta makes a little sense that way...[as in hitting a woman makes very little, if not just plain no sense]

just my take though...

:w:

That is an interesting perspective. Sometimes we forget in our modern age that girls(and boys) married at young ages in the not so distant past. If a 40 year old man marred a 12, 13, or 14 year old, which happened quite alot, it might make more sense for this rule of a "light" slap or whatever to be considered. For all intents and purposes they were children, and that might make sense to not "discipline" them harshly. It was a different time with different cultural realities.
 
I don't know...I thought marriage in Islam is a very serious matter, and one that is supposed to be undertaken only by those who are mature enough to handle the responsibilties of marriage. If a "woman" must still be treated as a child, surely she is not ready to enter into a marriage. I cannot imagine any Wali allowing otherwise.

Moreover, once you are married she is not your child, she is your wife and your partner, and you should treat her as such.

EDIT: I just wanted to add that this is my opinion, but as I said before all of us are probably going to have different opinions on the reasons behind this permission
 
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What does hadith say about women’s beating

As a matter of fact, women were granted all their rights through most of Prophet Mohammed’s (PBUH) sayings.
Even though Muslims consider the holy Qur’an as their primary tool that guides them through their life, a Muslim can never deny the benefits of the hadith; sayings of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH).
For centuries, Muslims used the sayings and advices of Prophet
Mohammed (PBUH) to support and elaborate what the Qur’an says.
Unfortunately, Islam has been accused of encouraging the mistreatment of women. But the Qur’an and hadith prove that this perception is wrong and unfounded.
Islam realized the importance of women even before the establishment of women rights’ organizations that have been spreading lately. It offered women the right to work in society, rendering useful service, even during wars. The noble religion also highlights the importance and necessity of women in any society.
As a matter of fact, women were granted all their rights through most of Prophet Mohammed’s (PBUH) sayings just as it granted men their rights. In many occasions, the Prophet urged Muslim men to treat their wives with kindness and stressed that a husband’s treatment to his wife indicates his good character and therefore his faith.
Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) specifically stated that a husband should smile to his wife, avoid hurting her physically or emotionally, protect her, treat her gently, and be patient with her.
Among the misperceptions some people have about Islam, is that the holy Qur’an encourages men to beat their wives, while in fact Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) said in a hadith: "You have rights over your wives, and they have rights over you. You have the right that they should not defile your bed and that they should not behave with open unseemliness. If they do, God allows you to put them in separate rooms and to beat them, but not with severity. If they refrain from these things and obey you, they have right to their food and clothing with kindness. Lay injunctions on women kindly, for they are your wards having no control of their persons” according to Mohammad's Farewell Address, Ibn Ishaq's "Sirat Rasulallah", Guillaume's translation.

Islam has also urged Muslim men to try to understand their wives and their needs instead of focusing on the negative traits, which exist in all of Allah’s (SWT) creatures because nobody is perfect. Saheeh Muslims said “Mohammed (PBUH) said “A believing man should not hate a believing woman. If he dislikes something in her character, he should be pleased with some other trait of hers.”

may allahs peace on all of us
 
salaam/peace;

Why isnt there a passage that a woman may beat a man (lightly)?


it's not practical .

It's not wise to hit ur opponent (!) if he is more powerful...he will hit u back & u will be in great trouble :(

if the relation is that bad , then Islam allows divorce ..so that they don't have to fight / disobey the Islamic manners.



a related link


Wife Beating ? Allah says, Live with them in kindness


Live with them on a footing of kindness and equity.

If ye take a dislike to them it may be that ye dislike a thing, and Allah brings about through it a great deal of good.”

(An-Nisa’: 19)


Prophet Muhammed (p) NEVER hit his any wife . Once when he was angry ; instead beating wives , he spent several nights outside home ( most probably at the mosque ). So, when a Muslim husband is angry , should not he follow this wonderful example ?




Dear Muslim husbands, Pl. remember that Holy Prophet Muhammed (p) said, "Do not beat the female servants of Allah"; "Some (women) visited my family complaining about their husbands (beating them). These (husbands) are not the best of you."




http://theislampath.com/smf/index.php?topic=1833.0
 
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this was discussed here before no?

RasulAllah P.B.U.H. Said:
"Never beat God's handmaidens."
"Could any of you beat your wife as he would a slave, and then lie with her in the evening?"


Question:
Could you please tell me why the Quran tells men to "beat them" meaning their wives? (chapter 4, verse 34)

Answer:
Thank you for asking about Islam. It is our committment to try our best to provide answers to questions to the best of our ability. However, sometimes we come across questions for which we do not have answers. In this case we will refer you to others who may be able to provide you with proper answers.

Please be aware that we as Muslims, must never lie about anything, especially our religion.

Secondly, we do have the original text of the Quran and the preserved teachings of Muhammad, peace be upon him. This enables us to verify exactly what was said, intended and taught by Muhammad, peace be upon him, as being the religion of Islam.

Third, I would like to remind myself and all who read this in the future that not all questions are purely questions. Some contain statements and implications, that may or may not be true.

Finally, it is important to keep in mind anytime we discover something in the answers to actually be better than what we already have, we should be committed to change our position and accept that which is true over that which is false and take that which is better for that which is inferior.

After taking all of the above into consideration, if we find that the answer to this question provides us with a better approach to understanding what Almighty God has provided us with as a way of life on this earth and in the Next Life, we should then make the logical decsion to begin to worship Him on His terms.

Having said that, let us now look to the particular verse in question in the original text (Arabic), followed by the phonetic sounds in Latin letters and then finally, followed by a translation of the meaning to the English language by experts in both Arabic and in Quranic meanings.




Transliteration
Alrrijalu qawwamoona AAala alnnisa-i bima faddala Allahu baAAdahum AAala baAAdin wabima anfaqoo min amwalihim faalssalihatu qanitatun hafithatun lilghaybi bima hafitha Allahu waallatee takhafoona nushoozahunna faAAithoohunna waohjuroohunna fee almadajiAAi waidriboohunna fa-in ataAAnakum fala tabghoo AAalayhinna sabeelan inna Allaha kana AAaliyyan kabeeran

Explanation (tafsir) of Sura 4:34
Here is the translation of meaning of the verse as best can be defined according to the rules of understanding Quran with the explanations following this translation:
“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allah), and guard in the husband's absence what Allah orders them to guard (e.g. their chastity, their husband's property, etc.). Regarding the woman who is guilty of lewd, or indecent behavior, admonish her (if she continues in this indecency then), stop sharing her bed (if she still continues doing this lewd behavior, then), [set forth for her the clear meaning of either straighten up or else we are finished and when she returns to proper behavior take up sharing the bed with her again], but if she returns in obedience (to proper behavior and conduct) then seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allah is Ever Most High, Most Great.”

Meaning of the Words
For the three words fa'izu, wahjaru, and wadribu in the original, translated here ‘speak to them in a persuasive manner’, ‘leave them alone (in bed - fi'l-madage'),’ and ‘have intercourse’, respectively, see Raghib Lisan al-'Arab and Zamakhsari. Raghib in his Al-Mufridat fi Gharib al-Qur'an gives the meanings of these words with special reference to this verse. Fa-'izu, he says, means to 'to talk to them so persuasively as to melt their hearts.'
(See also v.63 of this Surah where it has been used in a similar sense.)
Hajara - Wahjaru (do not touch or moleste them)
Hajara, he says, means to separate body from body, and points out that the expression wahjaru hunna metaphorically means to refrain from touching or molesting them. Zamakhshari is more explicit in his Kshshaf when he says, 'do not get inside their blankets.'
Here is the translation of meaning of the verse as best can be defined according to the rules of understanding Quran with the explanations following this translation:
“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allah), and guard in the husband's absence what Allah orders them to guard (e.g. their chastity, their husband's property, etc.). Regarding women guilty of lewd, or indecent behavior, admonish her (if she continues in this indecency then), stop sharing her bed (if she still continues doing this lewd behavior, then), [set forth for her the clear meaning of either straighten up or else we are finished and when she returns to proper behavior take up sharing the bed with her again], but if she returns in obedience (to proper behavior and conduct) then seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allah is Ever Most High, Most Great.”

Let me begin by explaining the English language is not powerful enough when it comes to translating the meanings of the Arabic of the Quran. Nor for that matter, is any other language on earth. So, all we have is translations of meanings according to the best understanding of the translators.

The operative word in this verse in Arabic is "daraba." While there are literally hundreds of uses for this word varying from "tap" to "walk in stride" to "strike at something" to "set a clear example", the only meaning that can be assigned to something in the Quran must be according to the rules of Quran. And Allah has used the same word a number of times with a consistent meaning. Let us examine them.

Here is what we find from the scholars of the Arabic language:
Daraba (to have intercourse, not to beat)

Raghib points out that daraba metaphorically means to have intercourse, and quotes the expression darab al-fahl an-naqah, 'the stud camel covered the she-camel,' which is also quoted by Lisan al-'Arab. It cannot be taken here to mean 'to strike them (women).' This view is strengthened by the Prophet's authentic hadith found in a number of authorities, including Bukhari and Muslim: "Could any of you beat your wife as he would a slave, and then lie with her in the evening?" There are other traditions in Abu Da'ud, Nasa'i, Ibn Majah, Ahmad bin Hanbal and others, to the effect that he forbade the beating of any woman, saying: "Never beat God's handmaidens."

Source: al-Qur'an: a contemporary translation by Ahmed Ali, Princeton University Press, 1988; pp78-79

Daraba (to set forth, to make a clear statement or proclamation)
One of the key rules of understanding words of the Quran is to go to other places in the Quran to investigate the usage in other places. This word is used by Allah in other places in the Quran to mean "set forth" or "sets up for you" or "makes known to you" - as is demonstrated in the following verses:
Surah Ar-Ra'd (13:17) yadribu Allahu al-amthala “Thus Allah sets forth a parable”
[here the word "yadirbu" is from the exact same root da-ra-ba]
Surah Ibrahim (14:24): Alam tara kayfa daraba Allahu mathalan .. “Don’t you see how Allah sets forth a parable?..”
And again in the next verse: Surah Ibrahim (14:25) wa yadribu Allahu al-amthala li-naasi
“..and Allah sets forth parables for mankind..”
[again the word yadirbu is from da-ra-ba]
Surah An-Nur (24:35) wa yadribu Allahu al0amthala lin-naasi
“And Allah sets forth parables for mankind..”
Surah Ar-Rum (30:28) Daraba lakum mathalan min anfusikum
“He sets forth for you a parable from yourselves..”
Surah At-Tahreem (66:10) Daraba Allahu mathalan lillatheena kafaroo..
“Allah sets forth an example for those disbelievers..”
In fact, the word daraba has not been translated to mean (beat) or (hit) or (strike) in any other verse of the Quran except this one.
The words for (beat) as in [to hit] found in Surah Baqarah 2:275 ... kama yaqoomu allathee yatakhabbatuhu ash-shaytanu mina almassi..
"..like the standing of someone beaten by the devil (Satan) leading him to insanity."

And in Surah Ta Ha 20:18 Allah Says, “Qala hiya Aasaya atawakkao Aalayha waahushshu biha Aala ghanamee waliya feeha maaribu okhra.”
"This is my stick, whereon I lean, and wherewith I beat down branches for my sheep and wherein I find other uses."

As you can see, these are not even related to the word (daraba).
Verses 34 and 35 in Surah An-Nisaa' need to be read together to understand this is the proper relationship between men and women in general and husband and wife specifically.

Islam seeks to hold the family together and to make peace and reconciliation between spouses. The next verse makes it clear what to do in the case where it seems that divorce may be the result of the uncorrected bad behavior. It stresses appointing arbitrators from both sides and seeks reconciliation.

The first part of 34 deals with all men taking care of all women. Then goes on to explain the wife's proper obedience to Allah because He is the One Who has ordained this relationship of provision and protection for her and to be appreciative and respectful of her husband, guarding herself and his property in his absence. The man is told the proper way to behave when he finds his wife not complying with decency and proper behavior of a Muslim wife. He has a direct order to begin with admonishing her and then if there is compliance to leave her be and don't give her a hard time about it.

However, if this continues, he should not have sex with her and this makes it clear to her that he is most serious and this not a joke. Again, if she comes around then he is to let it go and not bother her about it. Finally, if she still insists on such lewdness and bad conduct, he is to make it clear to her in no uncertain terms that they are going to be heading for separation or even divorce unless she comes back to proper behavior. Again, if she complies, then he should not bring it up and return to the bed with her.
And of course, this is all in an effort to translate one short but powerful phrase from Arabic to English. The sources are quoted herein and there may be other interpretations but the only acceptable ones are those based on the teachings of the Quran and the prophet, peace be upon him.
And as always, Allahu 'Alim (Allah is the Knower)

Source: al-Qur'an: a contemporary translation by Ahmed Ali, Princeton University Press, 1988; pp78-79

In the past, some translators of this verse have mistakeningly used the word "beat" or "hit" or even "scourge" (as in the case of an old translation) to represent the word "daraba" in Arabic. This is not the opinion of all scholars especially Raghib and Zamakhshari as mentioned above and those who are well grounded in both Islam understanding and the English language.
34.
Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allâh has made one of them to excel the other, and because they spend (to support them) from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient (to Allâh and to their husbands), and guard in the husband's absence what Allâh orders them to guard (e.g. their chastity, their husband's property, etc.). As to those women on whose part you see ill*conduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful), but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allâh is Ever Most High, Most Great.
The understanding now is that some of the translations are not properly representing the spirit of the meaning. Therefore, they cannot be considered to be the representation of what has been intended by Almighty God.

Now we can properly understand that Almighty God has commanded the men to provide for the women and allow them to keep all of their wealth, inheritance and income without demanding anything from them for support and maintenance. Additionally, if she should be guilty of lewd or indecent conduct, the husband is told to first, admonish her and then if she would cease this lewdness. If she should continue in this indecency, then he should no longer share the bed with her, and this would continue for a period of time. Finally, if she would repent then he would take up sharing the bed with her again.

And Allah is All Knowing of the meanings.



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courtesy of Br. Noname http://www.islamicboard.com/refutations/33209-wife-beating-12.html#post711125


have we gone into thread bankruptcy, that we are constantly recycling?


:w:
 
and another by BR. Qatada

Quote:
Originally Posted by Serdar
Anyone explain this:

Sahih Muslim

Book 004, Number 2127:
”…He struck me on the chest which caused me pain, and then said: Did you think that Allah and His Apostle would deal unjustly with you?...”



Answer to the mistranslation:


The term used in the hadith is:


Imam Nawawi in his Sharh states that:


The word "lahada" according to the lexicographers means, "to push" (dafa'a).

The usage of the word "struck" is not a correct translation. Rather, the phrase should be translated as (as sheikh Gf haddad said):

- He pushed my chest with a push that made me sore

Secondly, this calls to an important matter that is related to the Hand imposition of the Prophet - Allah bless him - because it is a gesture associated with driving away evil influence (waswâs) and conferring blessing as the following reports show:





1. Ubay ibn Ka`b said:


"There occurred in my mind a sort of denial which did not occur even during the Days of Ignorance. When the Messenger of Allah - Allah bless and greet him - saw how I was affected, he slapped me on the chest. I broke into a sweat and felt as if I were looking at Allâh in fear." (Sahih Muslim)


2. Jarir ibn Abdullah Al Bajalî was sent by the Prophet - Allah bless him - on a mission to destroy Dhu Al Kahalasa, the idol-house of Khatham, nicknamed the Yemenite Kaba. Jarr narrates:

"I went along with a hundred and fifty horsemen but I could not sit steadily on horse. I mentioned it to the Messenger of Allah - Allah bless and greet him - who then struck his hand on my chest so hard that I could see the trace of his fingers on it, saying: 'O Allah! Grant him steadfastness and make him a guide of righteousness and a rightly-guided one!' (Bukhari and Muslim)



More proof that the correct translation is ‘He pushed my chest with a push that made me sore’

Aaishah (Radhiallahu 'Anha) said: "Allaah's Messenger (Sallallahu 'Alaihi Wa Sallam) never hit anything with his hand ever, except when fighting in the path of Allaah. Nor did he ever hit a servant or a woman." [Recorded by Ibn Maajah. Al-Albaanee graded it Saheeh.]

Wife-beating can’t be considered "in the Cause of Allaah" - the reference in the Hadeeth is a reference to Jihaad on the battlefield. "When the prohibitions of Allaah were violated" is a reference to someone committing a crime, and their being tried and then punished by flogging. This is not a reference to the way a husband should treat his wife. So here we clearly see in a sahih (authentic) hadith that Aisha clearly told that the prophet ‘never hit a servent or a women’.


So this is also a clear proof that the usage of the word "struck" is not a correct translation. Rather, the phrase should be translated as (as Gf haddad said):

- He pushed my chest with a push that made me sore





Quote:
004.034
YUSUFALI: Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given the one more (strength) than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the husband's) absence what Allah would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them, refuse to share their beds, beat them; but if they return to obedience, seek not against them Means (of annoyance): For Allah is Most High, great (above you all).


This has been explained in this thread already in depth. And Allaah knows best.

http://www.islamicboard.com/refutations/33209-wife-beating-12.html#post728593



Everything is a science, you go to a doctor when you aren't sure what is ailing you and it certainly works better than the your neighbor's home remedy.. let's like wise approach ahel il'eilm when it comes to fiqh and jurisprudence.. we can't all be experts in every field.. we can najtahid, and we can ask when we don't know

:w:
 
Re: What does hadith say about women’s beating

As a matter of fact, women were granted all their rights through most of Prophet Mohammed’s (PBUH) sayings.
Even though Muslims consider the holy Qur’an as their primary tool that guides them through their life, a Muslim can never deny the benefits of the hadith; sayings of Prophet Muhammad (PBUH).
For centuries, Muslims used the sayings and advices of Prophet
Mohammed (PBUH) to support and elaborate what the Qur’an says.
Unfortunately, Islam has been accused of encouraging the mistreatment of women. But the Qur’an and hadith prove that this perception is wrong and unfounded.
Islam realized the importance of women even before the establishment of women rights’ organizations that have been spreading lately. It offered women the right to work in society, rendering useful service, even during wars. The noble religion also highlights the importance and necessity of women in any society.
As a matter of fact, women were granted all their rights through most of Prophet Mohammed’s (PBUH) sayings just as it granted men their rights. In many occasions, the Prophet urged Muslim men to treat their wives with kindness and stressed that a husband’s treatment to his wife indicates his good character and therefore his faith.
Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) specifically stated that a husband should smile to his wife, avoid hurting her physically or emotionally, protect her, treat her gently, and be patient with her.
Among the misperceptions some people have about Islam, is that the holy Qur’an encourages men to beat their wives, while in fact Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) said in a hadith: "You have rights over your wives, and they have rights over you. You have the right that they should not defile your bed and that they should not behave with open unseemliness. If they do, God allows you to put them in separate rooms and to beat them, but not with severity. If they refrain from these things and obey you, they have right to their food and clothing with kindness. Lay injunctions on women kindly, for they are your wards having no control of their persons” according to Mohammad's Farewell Address, Ibn Ishaq's "Sirat Rasulallah", Guillaume's translation.

Islam has also urged Muslim men to try to understand their wives and their needs instead of focusing on the negative traits, which exist in all of Allah’s (SWT) creatures because nobody is perfect. Saheeh Muslims said “Mohammed (PBUH) said “A believing man should not hate a believing woman. If he dislikes something in her character, he should be pleased with some other trait of hers.”

may allahs peace on all of us
why did you revive a long dead thread for? do you want to see proofs from both Quraan and Sunnah that neither one or the other should strike lightly or otherwise?

edit: oopsie its been done for the zillionth time! http://www.islamicboard.com/refutations/36432-wife-beating-islam-2.html#post858885

"Never beat God's handmaidens."
"Could any of you beat your wife as he would a slave, and then lie with her in the evening?"
 
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