Good post ...Would the Prophet (PBUH) go into a man's house and bark out this is haram and you must do this and that, Allah commands it!..of course not, he would not have lived long if he behaved like this. Islam is about respect and working things through and guidance not totalitarianism. Domestic issues are very sensitive and pontificating over them is not a good way. Here is an example...lets say a girl falls in love with a man. She is full of lust for him. At the same time her father and mother have got a match for her, the match is a good Muslim and a good provider. Her father tells the daughter he has a match for her, she is not sure what to do or say so she asks a friend what to do. The friend is not an Imam but rants out bits of the Hadiths and bits of the Quran and advises her that she can refuse her father and mothers wishes. She goes home and refuses her parents wishes, things get heated and hysterical so she runs away and goes with the man that she loves, he advises that they must leave the area for fear of the parents, so she runs away with him. He turns out to be a professional slave dealer. Enough said.
