Salam sis,
I think I heard in a hadith once [or was it in a Scholarly explanation?] that when a person dies and if someone physically assaults the dead body [like kicks it, etc] then the deceased feels the same as it would have done when it was alive.
Some say that organ donation will not be allowed based on this view...
Here is a relevant excerpt from
http://***********/aqida/cape_town_******/complete_refutation_shaykh_faiik.htm:
Do Not Harm Those in the Grave
In another Sahih Hadith narrated by Ibn Hanbal, Hakim and Tabarani, Nabi Muhammad (s) saw a person sitting on a qabr and told him: "Do not harm the person in the qabr and he will not harm you."(la tu'zi sahib al-Qabri wala yu'zeek).
The `Ulama of Hadith explained that this shows that the dead are affected by what people do at their Qubur. This Hadith also shows that the dead feel what happens on the top of their graves. Otherwise, why not sit on a Qabr, if the dead does not feel anything?
Therefore one should not harm or destroy Qubur. On the other hand showing respect at a qabr and conveying your love to the inhabitant will also be felt by him and result in like action being returned to you That is why Muslims show outward respect to the Graves of those who they are ordered by Allah (swt) to love, i.e. The Prophets and The Saliheen (saints of Allah).
Hope that helps
Salaam