my umrah experience...

**mayza** · 10-03-2007

Before reading this thread, I apologize if I misspell any Islamic terms. My knowledge of Islam is very limited.

It was December 1999 and my parents wanted the whole family to go to Umroh. This religious journey included going to Madinah, Mekkah, Tukey, Jordan, and Isreal. My parents, especially my dad, thought that giving me exposure to religion would be an answer and a problem solver to all my problems, which are a heroin and other drug addictions. Before leaving for Umroh, I was born a Muslim but became an atheist before this journey.

There were a few incident that I couldn’t explain.

I forgot when we departed but I do remember contracting a really nasty eye infection during the flight from A to Madinah. Both my eyes were releasing this substance that made my eyes really itchy and sticky. When I woke up, I had to literally use my hands to open my eye lids.

It was the first day arriving in Saudi Arabia and we headed to Madinah by bus from Jeddah’s airport. I still had the eye infection. I used eye drops but it had no effect.

The first incident was about to happen. After sight seeing and praying the 5 prayers and tarawih (sp?) prayer at Nabawi Mosque, I was really tired and went to bed. I woke up around 1 o’clock and decided to go to Nabawi Mosque and do Tahajud prayer (sp?) in the Roydah (SP?) area. I was told that praying in this area was very special and because it was the holy month of Ramadhan, it was more special. I prayed 2 rakka’at and afterwards prayed for many things, which included curing my eye infection. I stood up, walked towards the door which I came in and all of a sudden, my eyes were cured. There was no redness and things coming out of it. It was a miracle.

The second incident came the day after. My dad and I planned on praying in Ryadah (SP?) after the Dzuhur prayers, but were kind of hesitant because there were lots of military men guarding the area. King of Jordan at the time was about to pray there too. They were making a human fence, wrapping there arms together so no one can enter. It was total chaos. Lots of people wanted to get through but couldn’t. For some strange reason, my dad eventually got through, and told me to go in as well. I thought I wasn’t going to make it, but I did. I look behind me after I got through and there was this 70-80 year old man trying to get through but was pushed out by the guards. I felt sorry for the old man

We were trying to figure out where the Ryadah area was. It looked different than the night before at 1am. We sat down and just looked around. After awhile, this Pakistani guy sat down beside my dad. My dad asked him in English if he knew where the Ryodah area was and he answered. He pointed at 2 golden beams and told us to go there. My dad thanked him, we stood up and walked toward the golden beams. While I was walked around 5 meters, I looked back at the Pakistani, but he was gone. Where did he go? He just got there, after getting through the guards, and he went away? It just didn’t make sense. Could he be an angel?

We finally arrive at the Ryodah (sp?) area. This is where the ‘light’ incident was about to take place. We sat for awhile just looking at the magnificent mosque. My dad was sitting on my left and this big Arab looking guy sat on my right. My dad and I started to pray 2 rakkat. After finishing my prayer, I was in the sujud (Sp?) position (I don’t know the English translation) and prayed to Allah. Tears were coming out and out of no where, there was a light appeared on my lap. The Arab guy beside my right held my hand and started to cry, while I was trying to look up at the ceiling figuring out the source of the light. I couldn’t find any.

Till today, I don’t know what that light meant. Does anyone know? I’m still baffled. Is it a good sign or is it like a bad omen? What is exactly is Ryodah? Anyone care to explain?

After coming back from the trip, I kept on using drugs and now I’m really confused about religion. I’ve tried to do prayers (5 times a day), live a sober life, but I just keep coming back to drugs. I don’t know what else I can do. I can’t fill that void. I have to believe after the Ryodah incident, and I’m scared. Will Allah ever forgive me? I’ve done so many sins in my life.

Mayza

**ayesha309** · 12-06-2007

Originally Posted by mayza

Sorry, what's the diff? what does it mean?

Mayza

bro Mayza

I used the terms "passive creator" vs. "active creator". i learnt about these words in Philosophy class.
"Passive Creator" would mean that God created, then watched as things happen but did not participate. For example, God created Adam and Eve but has not created anyone else since. Everything has just happend since then (I assume this is where science plays the role)
"Active Creator" would mean God created Adam and Eve and also his kids and also his grandkids and you and me, etc. This is what we as Muslims believe, that Allah has created us all, each and every single individual. We are created by His command and His wishes and not only that but He helps us in every move that we make. If Allah wishes that we perform a certain action, then even if the entire creation against us we still perform that action becuase Allah wanted us to and Allah did it for us. And If Allah wishes that we don't do a certain action; no matter how hard we try, even if we have the help of the entire creation, we can not do that action; becuase Allah controls everything and He did not want us to do it. As Muslims, we believe Allah has created every person, every animal, every tree, everything. That's why He is the Lord of all creation. Even an ant hiding under a rock in the bottom of the sea; God has created it and created its parents and so on
I hope I have given an acceptable explanation. May Allah forgive me if I made a mistake. Once again I'd just like to remind you that I am not a scholar so I can definitely mistakes in my explanations.