How NOT to be TOO emotional

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Re: Assuming and Accusations on this board

:wasalamex


I agree, with u bro. masha Allaah some good points - we shouldn't accuse people of beleiving something when they havnt even actually said it.

At the same time, we shouldn't act like we're perfect, but we can give people da'wah to show them the difference between right and wrong, as long as we dont do it in arrogance insha Allaah. :)


wa Allaahu a'lam.


:salamext:
 
Re: Assuming and Accusations on this board

mahdisoldier19 said:
Salam Alaikam to all

Me and a few other brothers agree that there is some members of this board NOT THE WHOLE BOARD has this very very huge plague problem of accusing and assuming.

....edited for briefness and following rules...

Salam Alaikam hopefully some people give GOOD COMMENTS please for once
Click to expand...

I like your post. Do me a favor and cut and paste it on the "How NOT to be emotional" thread?

Do that for a bro will ya? Thanks.
 
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Re: Assuming and Accusations on this board

][/PIE][PIE][/PIE][PIE][/PIE][PIE][/PIE]
i agree
[PIE][/PIE][PIE][/PIE][PIE][/PIE][PIE]
 
Re: How NOT To Be Emotional

........... 2 days and this threads 4 long pages long, i managed to read up to page 2 and now i think it'll have to be a 'to be continued' since its getting late

Although this thread has some good points i like how its stayed humourous/serious with the touch of sarcasm here and there. With the bootiful imput of brothers takumi and muezzin.........

keep it up dudes.

wa'alykumasalam
 
Re: How NOT To Be Emotional

So far, let us some up some tips for the benefit of newcomers. :)

(1) Try to make the post humorous to YOU. [I know, I fail to do it sometimes. We learn]
(2) Respond to the post, not the POSSIBILTY how the post MIGHT sound if it were spoken by a real person.
(3) Switch on the Text to speech feature. For Macintosh help, PM me, or PC Help PM Muezzin.
(4) Use commas, question marks wisely. When in doubt, refer to your English Language books under the subject PUNCTUATION or PM czgibson.
(5) Read that hadeeth that Fi_Sabilillah quoted. Nice one!
(6)Post #37, too complicated to summarize. Just read it. :p
(7) Click SUBMIT at your own risk. If you can't handle your emotions, please don't click submit. You'll end up exposing yourself with your paroxysm of name calling which can be detrimental to your health.:p
(8) Semantics rocks: Quoting muezzin

Okay boys and girls. If you can, please read. There are some really neat balanced opinion in the thread.

Muezzin has been a gem. Halima showed some real class there, and other contributors like Silver Pearl, Swanlake, Shadow [I like to hang out with you, you're funny! We can get some Cappucino later, MY TREAT!!], Charisma, Fi_Sabilillah [as factual as ever! I salute you1] showed tremendous coolness in their posts. Sorry, no time to write everyone's name.

Wonderful!! .

Me, I've been so like Takumi Nakashima. :) [Hattori Hanzo can eat my shoe!] :p
 
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Re: How NOT To Be Emotional

Assalamu Alaikum

hey bro, ur back! :) welcome back! been a long time.
where u been?

fi aman Allah
w'salaam
 
Re: How NOT To Be Emotional

:sl:

Just floating around other forums. I thought i'd wade my way through the immaturity on these forums to find something useful to contribute to :)
 
Re: How NOT To Be Emotional

Public advice or PM?

It depends, and the jury is still out there.

Let's see some Guidelines.

(1) Public refutation of a post is needed because the original post is viewed by members publicly. So, if a member has a different opinion and would like to voice it, it's agreeable that he/she refute the opinion publicly. Of course, the caveat is, disagree with the OPINION not the person's way of writing.

(2) Sometimes due to overzealousness of refuting an opinion, we get carried away and JUDGE a person by his opinion. For example, if someone posts without daleel [even though the methodology of Fiqh clearly says that all wordly affairs are MUBAH except when Allah and His messenger had decreed it impermissible], some members are to quick to write "Are you writing from your desires?". What good will it bring to post such a sentence in PUBLIC?

(3) Or, if someone says, "Maybe the mods can find the daleel for me" and suddenly a respond comes in PUBLICLY, "that is laziness!". What good will it bring to that member who asks sincerely if the mods can help him out? Giving him an attribute that the prophet had made dua to NOT to have, is unprofessional and uncalled for.

(4) A very good example is on PM that I got from the member Nazia about my post that was out of line. Rather than crucifying me in public she chose to take the trouble to advise my post through a more confidential manner PM, unless you're on the member's ignore list, you'll be fine. Thanks Nazia.

So, choose the method of posting wisely. If you can live without humiliating a person's personality, then publicly voice your opinion. But, if you give attributes such as lazy, foolish or idiotic than maybe you need to sit down and get a real job, so that you won't have much time to expose your emotional fart. :)

Thanks.
 
Re: How NOT To Be Emotional

:sl:

Can i add to the list on how NOT to be emotional? Of course it is my opinion and in no way am i forcing others to accept it or agree with me.

1-Ok..Posters should let go and shouldnt hold grudge after they have run in with other posters. It is nothing personal. Life continues.

2- Posters should stop making mountain out of a molehill. Sometimes this gets way too emotional but posters dont realise it. Guess it is readers problem however the very same posters would shoot you down if they sense you are emotional.

That is my 2 cents. You could agree or disagree. Your problem, not mine :) (This is meant to smooth the harshness of the post..but it doesnt work, does it?)


Posters need to take the messege boards not so seriously.
 
Re: How NOT To Be Emotional

Does it reall matter if we are emotinal or not????

Is this soooo wrong????

I mean whats the point????

You cant stop a person from BEING emotional

SaLaMz
 
Re: How NOT To Be Emotional

Nice job! You gotta express yourself then people know you mean business. Of course we are not here to babysit other people's emotional instability. They gotta do that with their parents. It's their parents job, not ours. :)

So, it works! Rather than focusing on the persona of the writer, we FOCUS on the post.

A member is innocent until she/he's proven guilty. If a post doesn't mean to be personal, then the post MUST not even mention any personal traits for example, bullying, foolish, idiotic, moronic, stupid, laziness, retard, imbecile, asinine.

Read this post and see whether it's personally motivated:

"That is laziness"

"What kind of moronic question is that?"

"Bullying is not allowed in Islam"

"It is foolish of you"

"So, getting paranoid, are we?"

Can an opinion be LAZY?
Most of the time, only morons post moronic question. [hence, we imply that the questioner is probably a moron]
Can an opinion be a BULLY? [last time I checked this is a PERSONAL TRAIT]
Can an opinion be PARANOID? [DSMV IV doesn't even classify OPINION as paranoid]
Can an opinion be FOOLISH? It may sound foolish, but still, will IMPLYING that the person who writes it is FOOLISH foster intelligent and issue-based discussion?

If we don't want to get personal, then POST whatever is relevant to the ISSUE. :)

Do we discuss with real people out there or are we just comfortably sitting down in front of our computer typing. Some members do attend meetings, they actually in the fore front of organizations and make decisions for institutions.

We can learn a lot. We can guard ourselves from the negativity and we may take the positive outcome of post-exchange. Isn't that why we all are here?

The peace is upon you!
 
Re: How NOT To Be Emotional

Adjectives to describe an opinion

Agree:

(1) Kudos!
(2) Bravo!
(3) I like that!
(4) Masha Allah!
(5) Faire extrordinaire!
(6) Mubarak!
(7) I so agree with you on that one!
(8) Your clarity amazes me!
(9) I love the way you.....[fill in the blanks]

I'm sure you guys can add many more.
 
Re: How NOT To Be Emotional

Takumi said:
Adjectives to describe an opinion

Agree:

(1) Kudos!
(2) Bravo!
(3) I like that!
(4) Masha Allah!
(5) Faire extrordinaire!
(6) Mubarak!
(7) I so agree with you on that one!
(8) Your clarity amazes me!
(9) I love the way you.....[fill in the blanks]

I'm sure you guys can add many more.
Click to expand...

u da man

i like cookies

your posts are sooo inspirational that i wud marry your daughter any day :p

your words have such meaning that u deserve to be paid for it

your posts deserve recognition


yep thats all i can think of for now :beard:
 
Re: How NOT To Be Emotional

swanlake said:
:sl:

Can i add to the list on how NOT to be emotional? Of course it is my opinion and in no way am i forcing others to accept it or agree with me.

.......edited to follow Forum rules.......

That is my 2 cents. You could agree or disagree. Your problem, not mine :) (This is meant to smooth the harshness of the post..but it doesnt work, does it?)

Posters need to take the messege boards not so seriously.
Click to expand...

Exactly! I like the way you explained yourself. While everyone knows that's YOUR opinion, emphasizing it reminds many emotional farters out there to read and re read your post and only AGREE or DISAGREE with your opinion, not how you write it. :)

Give yourself some credit, the smiley does work! I accept that my disagreeing with you is MY issue, not yours. Harshness is a second party PERCEPTION.

I read in the Brother's Section one time, where a brother was asking another brother about his friend. The response was, "It's none of your business" and I went, "wow.. THAT'S BLUNT" but then I said:

I was the one who CHOSE to perceive that respond to be blunt. It was a mere sentence, with black alphabets that do not carry any emotional merit!

Then I gave myself the chance:

(1) Rather than imagining the brother talking to the other brother in a "IN YOUR FACE" style [which sadly is a default setting for many of us], I imagined him putting his hand over the other brother's shoulder and jestfully say, "it's none of your business" like I do sometimes with my friends.

(2) I gave the member who post the benefit of the doubt. They might know each other outside the forum and talking like that is accepted between them.

(3) I didn't even write to say "brother, your response was rude, can you have some finess? Bullying is not allowed in Islam"

Peace be upon you!
 

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