Am i wrong or right?

[جوري]

Sister Skye i think you are right may be my husband want to show me his love but i missunderstand him thats why he was crying and was telling me that i have to trust him because he loves me so much but you know sheytan can play with us and i had doubts thats all ALLAH forgive me INSHALLAH

That is a good start insha'Allah.. you appear to love him too.. difficult for me to imagine a man crying.. it must have been a tremendous moment.. insha'Allah, you'll be able to patch things and start fresh..

May Allah swt forgive us ajma3een

:wa:

 

[cat eyes]

You missunderstand sister he didnt tell me girls offering him sex there is no girls offering him sex he said some boys workers at work working with him asked him if any girl asked him to make sex would he accept that and he replied them no is like men chat and my husband told me that because he tell me everything happening at work anybody tell him something hes letting me know how these boys are stupid asking stupid questions thats all but me i listen to sheytan and start making accusation by my self iam stupid but honestly i started first i told my husband that one man asked me if you are my husband and then he was up set then he said today some boys asked me this thats the story ALLAH forgive me between me and my husband we cannot keep anything between us if anybody told us something we report it to each other only yesterday i was a bit moody thats all but i understand my mistake

ohh okay then it seems like shaytan is having a good old time with you then trying to mess your head up...but i believe that men who cry have something to hide the biggest emotion that would cause a human to cry especially for a man is pure and utter guilt or trying to avoid a situation where he might be questioned and he wont be able to look you in the eye anyway i suppose not every man is the same i suppose but listen be adults and don't be children try to sit down and talk through things in a calm fashion because if not it could lead to either one of you getting angry and it wont solve anything then in future you will be afraid to approach each other:wa:

 

[nilufer]

ohh okay then it seems like shaytan is having a good old time with you then trying to mess your head up...but i believe that men who cry have something to hide the biggest emotion that would cause a human to cry especially for a man is pure and utter guilt or trying to avoid a situation where he might be questioned and he wont be able to look you in the eye anyway i suppose not every man is the same i suppose but listen be adults and don't be children try to sit down and talk through things in a calm fashion because if not it could lead to either one of you getting angry and it wont solve anything then in future you will be afraid to approach each other:wa:

I think you missunderstand again my husband didnt cried because i questioned him plus i didnt questioned him because there is a nothing to questuioned him about , My husband was cried of his luck to have a stupid wife like me who accused him without any proof and accused him for nothing all he was telling me is about the boys at work and their stupid question to him thats all its my fault i told him that night that one man out side asked me if iam married , im gonna tell you something betwee me and my husdband we are like children we cry for every little things and we dont hide anything from each other thats why he was reported to me even what the boys told him at work if hes guilty what for he will reported to me listen sister iam not that stupid because i know iam only having wishpers from sheytan all the time .

 

[Khaldun]

Just to clarify men do cry, just not infront of women thats all.

 

[Blackpool]

Jealousy over him working with another girl? You're then thinking about cheating on him because you are worried that he maybe doing things with this girl? That's a strange mindset. The majority of women get jealous and most of the time for silly reasons but it needs to be reminded that this is modern life. Men and women work side by side to earn their wage, to return home and provide for their family. Work isn't a place for courting or at least it shouldn't be.

 

[Abdul Qadir]

You are right , Just up set talk thats all , I know i cannot do it because iam afraid from ALLAH SWT but also i blame my self because i missunderstand my husband because i know he doesnt cheat on me and hes telling me everything happened at work even he told me about the boys question but iam stuipd iam missunderstand him i hope if he can forgive me

ur husband loves u...and ur prolly just concerned about the type of ppl he is with and their influence upon him..dun worry...ur husband loves u and no harm will befall on ur relationship insyallah...

 

[cat eyes]

Just to clarify men do cry, just not infront of women thats all.

awwwwwwwww hehe :wub:

 

[cat eyes]

I think you missunderstand again my husband didnt cried because i questioned him plus i didnt questioned him because there is a nothing to questuioned him about , My husband was cried of his luck to have a stupid wife like me who accused him without any proof and accused him for nothing all he was telling me is about the boys at work and their stupid question to him thats all its my fault i told him that night that one man out side asked me if iam married , im gonna tell you something betwee me and my husdband we are like children we cry for every little things and we dont hide anything from each other thats why he was reported to me even what the boys told him at work if hes guilty what for he will reported to me listen sister iam not that stupid because i know iam only having wishpers from sheytan all the time .

seems ive misunderstood for the second time hummm i think you need to trust your husband and kill that jealousy or it will kill your marriage

 

[Muslimlearner]

Pls sis Nulifer-do not ask him to swear in Qur'an:it is wrong!

and,yeah:what shaytaan loves best is arguments between husband and wife.

Muslim men do cry in mosques..fear,hope,hearing Qur'an,making du'a ..
I did not see men in other religion to cry..
Subhan-Allah!

 

[Hamza Asadullah]

Asslamou Alaikoum Warahmatou ALLAH tAALA wABARAKATOU,

Sisters and brothers iam really writing with my tears and i really lost and dont know what to do

Today my husband came back from work and as always i prepare food for him and we start eating then he start telling that his friend lost the job because of a ***** girl shes working with them and i really feel sorry for the boy

Second he said that some boys at work asking me if there is an attaractive girl and she asking me to have a sex with her could you accept that and i replied no because iam married and i love so much my wife

To be honest while my husband is talking i felt lost and sheytan start playing with my mind and i fight with my husband accusing him with having sex with girls at work and he start crying and saying No

I really dont know what to do now , I feel i wanna cheat on him , I feel hes guilty but i have no prrof please iam wrong or right ?

Jazakoum ALLAH kheir

Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, my sister you should be happy that your husband has opened up to you and is so honest to you about what happens to him in his life. He has shared this sensative subject with you because your his other half and he loves you and if he can't share these things with you then who can he share these things with?

I think you should apologise to your husband and re-assure him that you want him to continue to tell you everything that goes in his life regardless of whether or not it will upset or hurt you because if you continue reacting like this wherenever he tells you things like this then surely he will hesitate in telling you things like this in the future as he will not want to upset you or want to cause you stress.

You should think to yourself that he did'nt have to tell you these things but he wanted to and you should really be flattered that he did because it shows he feels close to you.

You should make him feel comfortable in telling you everything that goes on in his life regardless of how upset it would make you because transparency in a marriage is very important and you should be happy he is wanting to share these things with you and not the opposite. It shows he wants to share everything with you and in a marriage this is a very good thing.

You should always have FULL trust and faith in him and also show him that you trust him. You cannot suspect him without any valid reason or solid evidance.

 

[nilufer]

Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, my sister you should be happy that your husband has opened up to you and is so honest to you about what happens to him in his life. He has shared this sensative subject with you because your his other half and he loves you and if he can't share these things with you then who can he share these things with?

I think you should apologise to your husband and re-assure him that you want him to continue to tell you everything that goes in his life regardless of whether or not it will upset or hurt you because if you continue reacting like this wherenever he tells you things like this then surely he will hesitate in telling you things like this in the future as he will not want to upset you or want to cause you stress.

You should think to yourself that he did'nt have to tell you these things but he wanted to and you should really be flattered that he did because it shows he feels close to you.

You should make him feel comfortable in telling you everything that goes on in his life regardless of how upset it would make you because transparency in a marriage is very important and you should be happy he is wanting to share these things with you and not the opposite. It shows he wants to share everything with you and in a marriage this is a very good thing.

You should always have FULL trust and faith in him and also show him that you trust him. You cannot suspect him without any valid reason or solid evidance.

Brother Hamza you are right i was totally wrong sometimes i have doubts even of my self and my family and my friends even without reason iam sick of doubts of people and now i start with my husband and i feel guilty but i cannot help it sheytan making me like that even with my self i did apologize to my husband and he accept it ALHAMDOLLIALLAH because he knows i have this problem of doubt and he told me that he will help me to cure it INSHALLAH , I really regret what i have done to him believe me brother if you see what hes doing to me you will really hate me because i really dont deserve a good man like him hes working hard to make money to give it to me even hes bank card is with me all the time he buy everything to me to make me happy and even he does not buy anything to himself same clothes all the time hes wearing at work he thinks to make me happy more than anybody else even more than himself hes telling me everything happened hes fear from ALLAH SWT hes crying when he listen to the quran or when you talk about the religion hes very sensitive man , iam so lucky to have him but iam stupid to not understand him , I trust him but sometimes i missunderstand what he is telling me and thats my problem not only with him but with all the people around me , i always hurted the people feelings and make them crying without any reason and without understanding them and later i wake up and i regret then i say sorry when sorry is so late but this is my sickness and please pray for me ALLAH SWT cure me and all people INSHALLAH

 

[nilufer]

ohh okay then it seems like shaytan is having a good old time with you then trying to mess your head up...but i believe that men who cry have something to hide the biggest emotion that would cause a human to cry especially for a man is pure and utter guilt or trying to avoid a situation where he might be questioned and he wont be able to look you in the eye anyway i suppose not every man is the same i suppose but listen be adults and don't be children try to sit down and talk through things in a calm fashion because if not it could lead to either one of you getting angry and it wont solve anything then in future you will be afraid to approach each other:wa:

You are wrong when a man is guilty he never cry because for his dignity but he can do something like confront you and rasing his voice and telling you iam not guilty and if you dont trust me so no need to stay together thats the guilty man believe me this is my second marriage and i have experience with the husbands but in my situation i was stupid and also because iam sick of doubts not only with my husband but with all people i hurted their feelings and make them cry and later i said sorry when sorry is so late , I have a problem with missunderstanding the people around me because sheytan make me like that , i HOPE allah swt CURE ME AND ALL THE PEOPLE inshallah

 

[Grofica]

i know reading the posts that he was just trying to show you how much he loves you but honestly if my husband told me something like that i would probably be a little... uhmmm upset too... maybe not that extreame but you can garauntee i wouldnt be a happy camper...

i guess thats the difference between men and women... i see how it could be sweet but i would rather get flowers and pretty words written on the card then hear that... just my personal opinion...

 

[Hamza Asadullah]

Brother Hamza you are right i was totally wrong sometimes i have doubts even of my self and my family and my friends even without reason iam sick of doubts of people and now i start with my husband and i feel guilty but i cannot help it sheytan making me like that even with my self i did apologize to my husband and he accept it ALHAMDOLLIALLAH because he knows i have this problem of doubt and he told me that he will help me to cure it INSHALLAH , I really regret what i have done to him believe me brother if you see what hes doing to me you will really hate me because i really dont deserve a good man like him hes working hard to make money to give it to me even hes bank card is with me all the time he buy everything to me to make me happy and even he does not buy anything to himself same clothes all the time hes wearing at work he thinks to make me happy more than anybody else even more than himself hes telling me everything happened hes fear from ALLAH SWT hes crying when he listen to the quran or when you talk about the religion hes very sensitive man , iam so lucky to have him but iam stupid to not understand him , I trust him but sometimes i missunderstand what he is telling me and thats my problem not only with him but with all the people around me , i always hurted the people feelings and make them crying without any reason and without understanding them and later i wake up and i regret then i say sorry when sorry is so late but this is my sickness and please pray for me ALLAH SWT cure me and all people INSHALLAH

Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, my sister it is clear that you have insecurity issues. This may have been triggered off by an experience that happened in your life that has made you like this. I would recommend that you see a counsellor because you may have past issues which have'nt yet been resolved in your head and still need to be tackled, and once this is done then these insecurities can be eradicated inshallah. This would be good for you and also ask of Allah to help you.

Also sister remember that shaythan can only whisper in your ear but it is your choice what happens after that. Next time whenever any situation arises just tell yourself to stop and think so that you don't over react and blow the situation out of proportion. Please also remember me in your dua's. Allah hafiz

 

[Humbler_359]

From now on, I think it is better for you and husband to avoid suspect. It is insecurity and panic.

Built TRUST
Built GOOD RELATIONSHIP
Built SMILE more
Built Love :embarrass


My advice is possible for your husband to move to different job and different location. This will reduce your worried. Again, trust your husband. Don't make him too stress and you.

 

[Khaldun]

Having read the posts I realise many people might come across as harsh towards sister nulifer.

Sister, we all make mistakes alhamdulilah that Allah made you realise your mistake, now work from there and try to be a support for your husband.

You are a good person and I ask Allah to help you in whatever you do and keep your marriage happy.

 

[nilufer]

From now on, I think it is better for you and husband to avoid suspect. It is insecurity and panic.

Built TRUST
Built GOOD RELATIONSHIP
Built SMILE more
Built Love :embarrass


My advice is possible for your husband to move to different job and different location. This will reduce your worried. Again, trust your husband. Don't make him too stress and you.

I dont want my husband to move to an other job what for its a big factory with thousands men and some women working there is normal everywhere there is women working with men and i trust my husband he does not contact any women nor spending any time outside all the time with me even he does not change clothes going at work same clothes for 1 year he does not look after himself when he want to go at work hes so faithfull i think you missunderstand my post i written my post when i was out of my mind because i suffer from syetan wishpering Aazobillah even i can have doubt about me and my family and friends INSHALLAH ALLAH SWT cure me and all the people in my situation Ameen

 

[nilufer]

Asalaamu Alaikum Wr Wb, my sister it is clear that you have insecurity issues. This may have been triggered off by an experience that happened in your life that has made you like this. I would recommend that you see a counsellor because you may have past issues which have'nt yet been resolved in your head and still need to be tackled, and once this is done then these insecurities can be eradicated inshallah. This would be good for you and also ask of Allah to help you.

Also sister remember that shaythan can only whisper in your ear but it is your choice what happens after that. Next time whenever any situation arises just tell yourself to stop and think so that you don't over react and blow the situation out of proportion. Please also remember me in your dua's. Allah hafiz

Broter i dont have any insecurities but when i was tenager i had this problem and my family tried to took me to the imams but nothing changed still happening even now , I will make duaa for you INSHALLAH

 

[nilufer]

i know reading the posts that he was just trying to show you how much he loves you but honestly if my husband told me something like that i would probably be a little... uhmmm upset too... maybe not that extreame but you can garauntee i wouldnt be a happy camper...

i guess thats the difference between men and women... i see how it could be sweet but i would rather get flowers and pretty words written on the card then hear that... just my personal opinion...

When i think about what my husband told me i really feel very happy and appreciate his trust to me because he does not hide like other men to their wife at least hes leting me know about the stupid boys mind at work and how my husband does not like them and their mind iam really very proud of him and my husband always gave me more than the flowers and cards he gave me and still giving his love and what he own , I wish all the women have same like my husband ALHAMDOLIALLAH , Hes doing everything for me and i dont think there is any man can give his bank card to the wife to control the money and spend it and cleaning the house and helping the wife in everything and crying when he see the wife sick this is my husband a wonderful heart and ALLAH SWT protect us and all the people AMEEN INSHALLAH

 

[nilufer]

Having read the posts I realise many people might come across as harsh towards sister nulifer.

Sister, we all make mistakes alhamdulilah that Allah made you realise your mistake, now work from there and try to be a support for your husband.

You are a good person and I ask Allah to help you in whatever you do and keep your marriage happy.

Thank you very much