Salaam AlikumI am sorry to tell you it didnt go well and I have been asked to leave and have been living alone for past 2 months and parents arent regretting having disposed of me .I concentrated on settling down in my new home and an mow seriously thinking about my future ie marriage and thus seems my marriage will have to happen without my parents blessings .I just want to know how what answers I can give to potential marriage partners when asked as to why I have been thrown out of house and distanced by my parents and relatives Should I just tell them we differed on our choice of the traits of the marriage partner and the arguments had reached a flash point which ended in separationBut then the bigger question is who will marry a person who is conflict with his parents ?.What is the best way to approach marriage in such a situation ? I also read that Man does not need a Wali for his marriage .
Waalaikumsalam
I'm really sorry because I gave you advice like that. I thought your parent heart would be softer and then tried to talk to you like commonly parents in my place.
Yes, a man doesn't need wali to get married, ..... in Islam. But in society?
I was a guy who had principle "one woman for lifetime". One day when I was 22 and still studied I meet a girl from 'traditional' family. I interested to her in the first meeting and I thought she could be the woman in my life. And I got her in second meeting.
I was happy because I thought I had meet the right girl to be my wife. But suddenly she told me that I must meet her parent and talked about marriage. I got panic because I was sure that my mother (my father had passed away) would not approve me to marry a girl who I had just met, and also I still studied. But I remember what my uncle from my father side had told me "In Islam a man doesn't need wali, he goes alone to nikah".
So I went alone to meet her parent and told them that I was serious to marry her. Of course they asked me why I came alone, and I told them "In Islam a man doesn't need wali. He goes alone to nikah. So I come alone to propose marriage". And I was scolded. They said "Yes, in Islam! but according to the custom in society you still need parent to get married!". And they told me that I should come with my mother.
Two day later I came with my mother and my uncle who told me that a man doesn't need wali. I told them that I wanted to introduce a girl. But when they came they realize that this meeting was to propose marriage. My mother anger was exploded , and it made that girl parent being offended.
Of course they told me that they felt objected because my mother did not approve it. But didn't want to surrender. I told them that everything would be okay. And I got support from their daughter who had been impressed to me since the first meeting. So they agree to give me time until I finish my study.
In the beginning everything seem okay. But then that girl realize that my mother still did not approve her. It made her doubt to marry me. She told me that she was worry that after she married me my mother would always against her. I still promised her that everything would be okay. But finally she decide to not marry me after she knew that my mother tried to match me with someone who came again to my life, my ex-classmate who later became my wife.
Yes bro, in Islam a man doesn't need wali to go to nikah. But society usually cannot accept it. And also a woman must be worry to get married with a man that his parent hostile her.
To be honest, you are in difficult situation. But, always make du'a wish Allah open the way for you to get married with the right girl. There's always a hope.
