I got rejected....my heart never learns.....I feel awful.....

[M.I.A.]

I wouldn't know because I've never been in a romantic relationship before, and I hardly see her...but I imagine I would.....although I could be wrong....

there you go..

be grateful your not good at women just yet.

Maybe your wife has to keep making up imaginary boyfriends..

ya never know, you could be lucky.


...the wink sealed it.

 

[sister herb]

Fortunately we have good smiley for your situation:

:coldwater:

So should I stop going to the Turkish cultural center, so as not to get temptation?

You should learn and remember to lower your gaze, just same are you in the Turkish cultural center, on the street, at the school or anywhere else.

Let your parents help to find to you your spouse when you are an adult. Excessive self-help only breaks your heart.

 

[Mustafa16]

there you go..

be grateful your not good at women just yet.

Maybe your wife has to keep making up imaginary boyfriends..

ya never know, you could be lucky.


...the wink sealed it.

what do you mean, "the wink sealed it"???

 

[Serinity]

Fill your heart with Qur'aan. The Qur'aan will guide your heart to a better state. In shaa' Allah.

And Allah :swt: knows best

 

[M.I.A.]

..sorry the wink is good..

Maybe you should start of with the wink.

heeediot!

I have no words.. for the complicated subject.

only the textbook answers will do.

 

[Mustafa16]

heeediot!


only the textbook answers will do.

are you calling me an idiot???? stop talking cryptically and spit it out....

 

[Aaqib]

are you calling me an idiot???? stop talking cryptically and spit it out....

Don't worry, M.I.A. is that guy who you just have fun with lol

 

[M.I.A.]

this is why I don't have fun.

...no fun allowed!

haram.

:|

although I have been there..

and even if you lose the wink some people will still be bad at womening.

I am grateful.

...hopefully I don't become someone's wife in prison.

 

[ardianto]

what should I do?

Learn from Mister Ardianto. He always nice and polite toward women, and never chased the women. That's why the women have positive image on him, and it made him easy to get someone when he was looking for future wife.

 

[Scimitar]

what is the difference between infatuation and love, anyway?

love is justifed

infatuation isnt.

love happens between two people.

infatuation is like winking at a girl in the dark, you know what you are doing but she doesn't.

Savvy?

Scimi

 

[keiv]

I don't follow your all your threads but, from what other people are saying, it seems like you have a new crush fairly often. Do you think you're ready for marriage? If so, what's stopping you from chasing other women after you thought you've married "the one"? You really need to figure out your priorities in life.

 

[Scimitar]

that may take some time... the transition from puberty into manhood was bloody confusing for me... and I messed up bigtime.

the only advise I can give is - stay put until the proposals start pushing up on ya!

Then pick one ;D

Scimi

 

[Scimitar]

this is why I don't have fun.

define "fun"

...no fun allowed!

haram.

correction: NO HARAM FUN ALLOWED... there's plenty of halal fun to be had, without the opposing sex involved.

although I have been there..

where?

Actually, on second thoughts, don't answer that.

and even if you lose the wink some people will still be bad at womening.

I am grateful.

...hopefully I don't become someone's wife in prison.

Bro, is there something you aint telling us?

Actually, keep it to yourself.

Scimi

 

[M.I.A.]

slow day on ib..

some people can, some people can't and some people won't.

it's all part of growing up.

may Allah swt have mercy upon you.. us.


I myself am at a stage where I consider that most women are beautiful..

until they open there mouths

*runs away*

 

[Spartakos]

I am currently 17, and I told a 12 year old girl I've liked for years now that I like her, and she rejected me. I was at a Turkish festival, and I told her I had to tell her something, and her friends told me to say it in front of them....I told her I had a crush on her, and she politely turned me down by saying she already liked someone else, and that I was much older than her......so I walked away....at first, I felt relieved that I was able to get it off my chest.... and much later, I told her, first in Turkish, then in English, "maybe when you're older" before winking......I wish I was ashamed of myself because dating and casual romance is haram, but I'm sad to say it's hard to feel bad about that when I feel so sorry for myself....my heart never learns from my brain or from my religion, and I feel awful.....what should I do?

Listen brother...
you did NOT got Rejected, you got declined, girls and women dont Reject, they TEST the masculine of man by declining offers to see if you really mean of what you say, by 'walking away from the festival'' just because she said she likes someone else, it shows that you are weak and that you wouldn't been able to live without her! a girl wants a guy that doesnt NEEDS her, instead he wants her.

The reason its because she might want to meet other guys she likes aswell and also prolly because she is too young for you, could be also because she doesn't feel like its a good time to be in a Relationship with anyone, regardless you dont walk up to a girl and tell her directly that you like her, or have crush on her, because how can you really like her if you haven't been with her as a lover? you've been acting as a friend to her for ''years'' as you said and now that is kind of safe you tell her ''I Like you!" and automatically you are asking approval if she likes you aswell ''Do you like me?" its like you were faking your feelings towards her untill you felt that its safe to let her know that you do like her and thats manipulative.

Anyway you are 16.. talking to girls for me came on my 20's and its a game's number when it comes to women, there are plenty enough to enjoy talking, having fun, being in love with and you have plenty of time to learn and experience it first before going deep to get in a ''relationship''.

Don't get attached on seeing girls as a means to an end, you don't go to talk to girls only to get in a relationship or maybe get married etc.
You do it because you love girls. Don't ya? If not then there is something wrong with you and you will need to sit and clean that mentality.

What i wrote its not going to be a good response for the 95% here because islamicly what i explained could sound for some people negative.
Islamicly you seriously need to make your mind up and go to that girl and tell her that you are interested for marriage and you would like to get to know her through her Parents,dad,mom etc, else you get in touch with her parents and let them know instead.

My sugguestion? stop it and first learn at school, study something or do what you love to, have a future goal, plans and purposes and i guarantee you, you will find the right woman in your life ps: i'm not sure where you live but whatever you do... HAVE FUN, thats the whole point in dunya to enjoy your time in peace and have fun.
You will realise that real love ain't like the lust that you can have, its something you both immediatly see when you meet each other

Spartakos

 

[Huzaifah ibn Adam]

That's called lust, my lad. Love is something else entirely.

Would you die for her, that woman you love? Be killed for her? That is love. What you are experiencing is lust. Lust vanishes very quickly.

 

[Huzaifah ibn Adam]

Do you know the stories of Layla and Majnoon?

 

[Mustafa16]

Do you know the stories of Layla and Majnoon?

I heard about it when my class was reading "A Thousand Splendid Suns" by Khaled Hosseini, where the old abusive man who marries the two main characters, one through deception, refers to one of the two women in the story and her male friend Tariq as "Layla and Majnoon" (the girl's name was Layla)

 

[Mustafa16]

Do you know the stories of Layla and Majnoon?

also, isn't it the Muslim version of "Romeo and Juliet"?

 

[Huzaifah ibn Adam]

No...

It's something else entirely.

Whether the stories about them is true or not is a mystery. The real name of Majnoon was Qays ibn al-Mulawwih. He was called "Majnoon" which means "a mad man", because his love for her was so much, he lost his mind. Now, there are differing reports about why they were not able to get married: some say it's because he was a prince and she was a slave, others say it's because she was a princess and he was a pauper and a nobody. The custom in those days was to only marry someone on the same social standing as yourself. There is more evidence to show that he was the prince and she was a slave and thus his family prevented him from marrying her, despite the fact that they were childhood friends.

When Layla passed away, Majnoon used to wander the streets of the neighbourhood wherein she lived. He used to say that he loved her so much, he even loved the dogs in the neighbourhood she lived in. He used to hold on to the walls of her house because it reminded him of her. He loved the street she used to walk on.

One day, the ruler at the time came to hear about Majnoon's extreme love for Layla, and so he thought she must be an extremely beautiful woman. He summoned her to his palace. When she arrived, he saw that she was extremely dark and had no attractive features whatsoever. He asked her, "What on earth does Majnoon see in you?" She replied, "O king, you are seeing me through your eyes, so you cannot see the attraction. You have to see me through the eyes of Majnoon..."