Mixed-Race Marriages...

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I am British and my husband is Arabic!

We argue all the time, I want to watch CNN and he wants to watch Aljazeera:D

I am blissfully happy with him and have learnt soo much from his culture. His family are wonderful, they accepted me with open arms, and lets face it that coudn't have been easy for them! We really don't have to work at the culture bit, as I love his culture:)

Best bit, is the Arabic food is yummy and all my friends love when I invite them to dinner.

Seriously though, I think that if couples have problems they would be there anyway, just a different set of problems.
 
:sl: sister

Im a revet too :) Ive married a pakistani guy :) alhamdulillah we are really happy. The culture and food thing isn;t really an issue for us either. We learn from each other and besides marriage is a whole lot of compromise anyway :) We have a 2 year old daughter now and she learns his language as well as English and I think she has the best of both worlds :) InshAllah she'll be a very wise and culturally aware person :)

**Edit** I didnt realised I put all those smileys :P lol
 
I hope to marry an Arab guy. I've lived in Arab country most of my life so I hope I won't have any problems with getting used to his lifestyle.
 
Salam

Wow, I have been discussing this topic with nearly anyone I run into lately...and now here it is on LI.hehehe..

Firstly I ADMIRE mixed-race marriages...I love it when someone goes, "oh i'm half pakistani half arabic." I kind of do this face:


REALLY??:happy:

I used to be completly "pro" mixed-marriages"...but...lately I've been thinking it through and,well, I don't know, if it works for you, then go for it, but this is something you really need to think through. Like, let's say u were born and raised in the U.S, but you're originally from an arabic country, well that doesn't mean that you've forgotten your culture and adapt to the U.S lifestyle, and that marrying a pakistani(for example) will be extremely easy because he/she has lived the same way.

Chances are if your arabic,pakistani,indian,spanish,etc... your parents fought to keep your culture alive...so you'd have a connection as to where you came from. I think this is the reason why some families feel uneasy about their kid marrying someone from a different culture. You might still have family back home; it will be hard for both sides to interact (i.e language barriers,etc.) And,let's be truthful, ALOT of people still have ridiculous/judgemental opinions on this matter; its enraging but true..*sigh*.

And if having a big family where everyone knows/clicks with each other is important to you, then culture is something to consider. I'm not saying that some cultures won't click together,like I said, for some people, it can work perfectly, but for others, it might not. It's like...your grand-parents, what if they don't speak english all that well? How will they communicate with your husband/wife?or their family?


I don't know I admire it but in the end it's something that requires effort IMO.
 
Clover said:
I used to be against Inter-racial relationships, now...do what you wana do man. It's YOUR life, not anyone else's. If they wana call you names for loving someone who has a different skin color, then shame on them, and forgot them, you are you, and she or he, are she or he, thats all that matters. I like a black girl, and would do anything for her, I do not care that she's black, it's the fact that she is my friend. As I heard in a great movie

"When you're alone late at night in bed, just you and her under the covers, that's all that matters" -Sonny, A Bronx Tale. That's about a Italian kid who loves a black girl, and this is when racial tension was extremely high.
Click to expand...

do we have to pass the door test or the mario test lol :D only kidding great movie
sonny had 5 fingers but he only used 3
 
Im all for mixed race marriages and definitely believe that they can work. No one is from one "pure" background we are all a mixture of everything. Im of South Asian descent whilst my partner is mixed race and I love learning about his culture and we like to share things and discuss things. However the down side is certain members of my family do not agree with marrying outside of your culture so I guess it could affect them but at the end of the day we're not harming them in anyway so really they should just learn to accept it.
 
:sl:

I'm not against mix marriages at all, but it not for everyone and one must take thier situation into account. If you think marrying this person would cause more harm than good, then one should re-assess the situation. What happens is a couple meet (sometimes not the proper way) they are from two different back grounds and make the commitment to marry, but one side would know it wouldn't work and would cause a uproar in the family. If you know its going to cause so much fitna do you really think its worth it. But like I said I'm not against it, but when we are young and naive we don't take all the different factors into account and just run with our hearts wit a zealous attitude.

I wouldn't personally marry outside my culture, and not because my family would not be happy about it. But because I want my wife to be able to communicate well with my family without any cultural or language barrier. Plus mashallah there are many good Somali sisters for me to choose from, inshallah may Allah bless us with a good wife, and protect us from crazy feminists.
 
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are there any pitfalls to consider if a brother from the UK, of pakistani origin, was considering marrying a sister who has been raised and lives in egypt/syria? how difficult would it be for the sister to relocate to the UK?
 
Doesn't matter what race you're from as long as the person is pious and of good character
 
amani said:
yup it really all depends on the couple, race will only become a problem if the couple want to make it a problem. both just have to work at it :wub:
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Bismillah

I agree. My wife and I are not of the same race, however, it is not the race that shows its ugly head, but the differences in cultures that sometimes clash. However, you will never find a spouse that is exactly a clone of yourself. Compatibility is not what the couple has in common, but if their differences can be worked out.

However, one thingI would be against unless there was no alternative was interfaith marriages.

WaAllaahu alim.
 
Mixed race does not seem to pose any major problems as long as they are both of the same culture. Mixed culture seems to become an issue though. I do see some major issue developing in the future as people migrate and the culture changes over the generations.

A good example I see taking place in todays world is the formation of distinct Pakistan Cultures. The third generation Pakistan descendants living in the UK do seem to differ from the people of Pakistan and the third generation of people of Pakistan origin living in the USA diffe from both. This may cause problems in the future among people of Pakistan heritage intemarrying as each group does differ in culture. More arguements seem to develop when cultures have only minor differences. Major differences are visible and esily worked around, when the differences are slight, it seems major problems form.
 
AssalamuAlaykum

I havnt properly read any of these posts in a long time. I still cant define my feelings regarding the matter. But it all boils down to one thing, if you really want something to work...if something means so much to you, you could move mountains to make it work bi'ithnillah.

Differences divide us so much when they shouldnt really.

Several things though:


  • If people gossip and talk just because you decided you want to marry outside of your culture, let them.
  • If you ever find the process difficult and begin to regret making the decision, remember that attaining the things that mean the most to you will never be easy.
  • When you talk to your parents, do it in a calm and rational manner.
  • Your happiness DOES mean something, although parents does too...even though you wanna rebel you gotta remember the status of parents in Islam. Do NOT be rude to them.
  • And last but not least...You only get one shot at this [Insha'Allah]...Make sure you're happy with the final decision and sure.
WassalamuAlaykum
 
for me it doesnt matter as long as he is religious guy nd he respect my family nd my family loves him !! dats my opinion
 
Personally for me, I am all for it. No matter what someone's race is, all that matters is if you love the person.

Also, racial religions like Hinduism and Judaism oppose inter-racial marriage in practice because they do not proselytize. But in Islam, all races are held equal and only faith, knowledge, and righteous conduct that make people better than others not race. So as Muslims (or fair people in general) everyone should allow inter-racial marriage.
 
Salam,
No, it doesn't matter at all what "race" (I hate this word, really, we humen aren't divided into races like animals) you are for if the marriage will go well or not. The culture can sometimes be a little hard to deal with for both, but you can be a white person in Kuwait and a black person in Norway and then just have different cultures but the skin colours are the opposite for the countries normally. We're all humen, just different colours on a skale from white to beige to brown to black, but if doesn't make us different. And if the culture suddenly becomes a problem, that's another thing. And a married couple can deal with it inshallah, if they can't then it's between them that they couldn't fix it. But I believe that all problems can be solved...
 

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