*~My Poems Thread~*

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lololol omg guys.. im chuffed, shy, shocked all at once lol tnx for liking :-[:D

btw, is it obvious that the girl in the second poem dies? :?
 
subhanAllah, i just noticed the new replies.. thank you so much everyone. I will def continue to write inshaAllah :)


bro you have no idea how many times i read that second poem
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mashaAllah lol.. and i feel ashamed to admit that i've been doing it to.. lol thats sad
 
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^ no its not that obvious lol, but its an interpretation

or you can interpret that she just fell down :-[
 
Scents of Jannah said:
btw, is it obvious that the girl in the second poem dies? :?
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I think that's whats awesome about the poem..it means something different to everyone, everyone gets it in a different way..i.e. I interpreted..and it was something different..and others would probably be different as well.

Makes it very enjoyable to read if it's like that because each time you read you interpret it differently :thumbs_up
 
oh no! lol

she has to die :skeleton: :BeRightBack: lol

and bro Hakim plz feel free to add to your collection inshaAllah
 
Scents of Jannah said:
and bro Hakim plz feel free to add to your collection inshaAllah
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i feel like printing it out and adding it in a private collection in which it may remain the only poem for a long time due to its level of depth
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i dont have any other poems yet sis

i have my own personal collection but im considering starting one of the masterpieces from LI's members.


so far you and abu sayyad have taken my breath away with your poetry

jazaKAllah khair to you both
 
Abu Sayyad said:
I think that's whats awesome about the poem..it means something different to everyone, everyone gets it in a different way..i.e. I interpreted..and it was something different..and others would probably be different as well.

Makes it very enjoyable to read if it's like that because each time you read you interpret it differently :thumbs_up
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that's a good point too mashaAllah... it's just that I pictured everything so vividly, including her death, so it not being obvious to the reader is bothering me a bit. But, I will give it a little longer and see how I feel.

shukran bro
 
^ well sis you could alter it a little but i found the way it ended good enough as it is


but upto you inshaAllaah
 
OMG !!
243j8cm-1.jpg


whats this im reading INCREDIBLE poems on LI these last Hours :ooh:

MashaAllah Sis , JazakAllahu Khair...


:w:
 
JolieFleur said:
I.....is lost for words

Seriously, the images were....Rabeee! I just loved it sis...if you had entered the poetry contest you wudda won hands down :ooh: please stay tuned for the next contest insha'Allah
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lol no comment! glad u liked it though :D


IbnAbdulHakim said:
i dont have any other poems yet sis
i have my own personal collection but im considering starting one of the masterpieces from LI's members...so far you and abu sayyad have taken my breath away with your poetry..jazaKAllah khair to you both
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Ah, ok! Wa iyyak bro and thanks for your kind comments and support.


Güven said:
OMG !!
243j8cm-1.jpg
whats this im reading INCREDIBLE poems on LI these last Hours :ooh:
MashaAllah Sis , JazakAllahu Khair...
:w:
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lol@big face! wa iyyak Guven bro - it's all praise to Allah.
 
:sl:



Regret

beauty of all shapes, color and size
what hadn't he looked at with those eyes?
until a veil of blindness had descended
his days of transgression suddenly ended


now his eyes are dead to the sinful gaze
his mind begins to clear of evil's haze
he'd tasted the pleasure of forbidden fruit
yet his soul remained famished in dispute


"why?" he repeats, "Do I feel empty inside?"
until the answer comes in a blessed disguise
the distant sound of Qur'anic recitation
he knows what he must do without hesitation


as now in the sundown of his life
when self-denial is no longer rife
he clearly sees what he's left behind
and wonders how he could've been so blind?


he remembers in the spare room.. a dusty nook
something priceless lies in the shape of a book
not once he'd glanced at a single page
but had left it there to yellow with age


a desperate hunger begins to fill his soul
the recitation is getting louder nextdoor
gripping his stick he reaches the spare room
sending things flying in its murky gloom


and soon.. his hand settles upon the dusty Book
a sob explodes in his chest, oh how long it took!
his heart soars as he opens its pages
like million birds let out of their cages


repentance mists over sad eyes with tears
"will Allah ever forgive me - since death nears?"
and as if something is telling him to keep listening...
he hears.."And Seek forgiveness of Allah;surely Allah is Forgiving.." (73:20)


willing his eyes to see, just for a few seconds
to see Allah's Words, His gift of Guidence
in hope of forgiveness he raises his hands
as tears splash onto the Holy Qur'an

(Edited)


:w:


:-[
 
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mashallah i loooooved the second and last one
clearly you'r really talented mashallah!!!!!!

jazakallah khair sis :D
 
Awwww Masha'Allah, ur poetry is beautiful. I love writing poetry to catch phases in my life but i'm not so brave to share cos i feel safer if it's inside me lol if that means anything at all^^!

Jazakillah khairun for sharing
 
wa iyyaki, thank you for liking. I believe everyone has the potential as we all possess emotions and an imagination. It just takes different things to trigger it off in us. If that makes sense :p
 
hmm...

i dunno maybe forever was a bit too good because i didnt feel the last one much at all

though the vocabulary was really good


a bit of criticism is good :D
 
^lol! that's cool bro. it depends what we can relate to as well.

p.s. criticism is welcome! :p
 

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