non muslims as friends?

[SirZubair]

The Qur'an teaches us how to address the people of different faiths. In referring to non-Muslims, the Qur'an usually uses the terms "people," "People of the Book," and "My servants." These descriptions were mentioned in the Qur'an. But, in Islam, sins are not inherited. The Prophet (peace and blessings be upon him) said, "If one is cursed (by being rendered into pigs or others), he or she would not have any children." And we know from history that those people who were punished this way by Allah did not have children or offspring because they were all destroyed.

In his response to your question, Dr. Muzammil H. Siddiqi, president of the Fiqh Council of North America, states the following:

Dear Jack, you have not received correct information about the Qur'an. I recommend that you read it yourself. In the Qur'an, Allah has mentioned in three places stories of people who were turned into apes and pigs. Almighty Allah says: [And ye know of those of you who broke the Sabbath, how We said unto them: Be ye apes, despised and hated!)] (Al-Baqarah 2:65). He also says: [Shall I tell thee of a worse (case) than theirs for retribution with Allah? Worse (is the case of him) whom Allah hath cursed, him on whom His wrath hath fallen! Worse is he of whose sort Allah hath turned some to apes and swine, and who serveth idols. Such are in worse plight and further astray from the plain road] (Al-Ma'idah 5:60). In another chapter, He says: [So when they took pride in that which they had been forbidden, We said unto them: Be ye apes despised and loathed!] (Al-A`raf 7:166). In these verses, you will see that that a group of people refused to follow Allah's commands that were given to Moses. They had turned against Allah's laws and were punished by being turned into apes and pigs.

The Qur'an does not say in any place that all Jews are apes and pigs. On the contrary, the Qur'an says about Jews and Christians in general [ They are not all alike. Of the People of the Scripture there is a staunch community who recite the revelations of Allah in the night season, falling prostrate (before Him). They believe in Allah and the Last Day, and enjoin right conduct and forbid indecency, and vie one with another in good works. They are of the righteous. And whatever good they do, they will not be denied the meed thereof. Allah is Aware of those who ward off (evil)] (Aal `Imran 3:113-114).About the Jewish people in particular it is said in the Qur'an [And of Moses's folk there is a community who lead with truth and establish justice therewith] (Al-A`raf 7:159).

Muslims, Jews, and Christians have lived side by side in peace and harmony for centuries. This is what we should do and try to do. We should get rid of prejudice and misunderstandings and should not be involved in propaganda directed against each other.

Source

Dr. Muzammil Siddiqi, President of the Fiqh Council ofNorth America, states:

The Qur'an does not say that non-Muslims cannot be Muslims' friends, nor does it forbid Muslims to be friendly to non-Muslims. There are many non-Muslims who are good friends of Muslim individuals and the Muslim community. There are also many good Muslims who truly and sincerely observe their faith and are very friendly to many non-Muslims at the same time.

Islam teaches us that we should be friendly to all people. Islam teaches us that we should deal even with our enemies with justice and fairness. Allah says in the Qur'an in the beginning of the same Surat Al-Ma’dah: [O you who believe! Stand out firmly for Allah as witnesses to fair dealings and let not the hatred of others to you make you swerve to wrong and depart from justice. Be just, that is next to piety. Fear Allah, indeed Allah is well-acquainted with all that you do.] (Al-Ma’dah 5 :8)

In another place in the Qur'an, Allah Almighty says:

[Allah forbids you not with regard to those who fight you not for your faith, nor drive you out of your homes, from dealing kindly and justly with them. For Allah loves those who are just. Allah only forbids you with regard to those who fight you for your faith, and drive you out of your homes and support others in driving you out, from turning to them for protection (or taking them as wali). Those who seek their protection they are indeed wrong- doers.] (Al-Mumtahinah 60: 8-9)

Moreover, Allah Almighty has described Prophet Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon him) as "a mercy" to the worlds. He was a sign of Allah's Mercy to all, Muslims as well as non-Muslims. In his kindness and fair treatment he did not make any difference between the believers and non-believers. He was kind to the pagans of Makkah and fought them only when they fought him. He made treaties with the Jews of Madinah and honored the treaties until they broke them.

Source

 

[Joe98]

The Muslim is to be nice, neighborly, decent and friendly with all people so that his good behavior is a means of calling others to Islam.

This does not mean that he loses his identity and affiliates himself with disbelievers, or that he allows himself to be influenced by them - only that he is respectful and cordial with them.

You completely excluded a close friendship. Which was the original point.

 

[Ansar Al-'Adl]

You completely excluded a close friendship.

If that is what you wish to believe about it, sure.

Which was the original point.

Your's perhaps.

Peace

 

[cihad]

i think that there will always be a pyschilogical barrier between muslims and non-muslims

i mean, c'mon if you were really their friend you would want the best for them wouldn't you?

 

[Muhammad]

Greetings and ,

It is wrong to over-generalise (in response to deleted posts). Non-Muslims do talk about things considered sinful in Islam, which is a reason why we should distance ourselves from them and surround ourselves with people that encourage us to be good Muslims; but at the same time there are many good non-Muslims whom we can talk to, not necessarily as closest friends, but maintaining a bond of friendship to some degree often opens the door to good communication and understanding. Sometimes the people we work with are those that drink and enjoy sin, but it does not mean we should never speak to them nor try to maintain some kind of a bridge over which we can fulfil our responsilility to teach Islam.

 

[Jameel]

yeah good point muhammad, but me personally, i completely hate being in the company of them. Because i am in college at the moment, the kuffar here, are going through that stage, where they just want to go out and party all day, go drinking late night at the pub, night clubs, talk of extreme filth all the time, with no shame at all.
Its disgusting.

 

[SirZubair]

yeah good point muhammad, but me personally, i completely hate being in the company of them. Because i am in college at the moment, the kuffar here, are going through that stage, where they just want to go out and party all day, go drinking late night at the pub, night clubs, talk of extreme filth all the time, with no shame at all.
Its disgusting.

Just remember, there will be a time and place when you will need the help of the 'kuffar'. Imagine that you are driving down the road...

*CRASH*

You've run into a tree. You are bleeding from top to bottom,..

..a 'kuffar' that saw the accident calls an ambulance,..

.. the 'kuffar' ambulance driver puts his life to risk and rushes over to rescue you.

After a long hard struggle, they manage to get you out of the Car.

You have lost alot of blood,.. so they pump some blood into your body,... yep, some 'kuffar' blood..

.. and then you get to live to see another day.

So the moral of the story is,.. don't be a hater. It is not what the Prophet (saw) preached to us, he did not tell us to hate the company of non-muslims.

So come on akhi, don't be a hater, be a play'a congradulator...kay:

 

[justahumane]

Greetings and ,

It is wrong to over-generalise (in response to deleted posts). Non-Muslims do talk about things considered sinful in Islam, which is a reason why we should distance ourselves from them and surround ourselves with people that encourage us to be good Muslims; but at the same time there are many good non-Muslims whom we can talk to, not necessarily as closest friends, but maintaining a bond of friendship to some degree often opens the door to good communication and understanding. Sometimes the people we work with are those that drink and enjoy sin, but it does not mean we should never speak to them nor try to maintain some kind of a bridge over which we can fulfil our responsilility to teach Islam.

Well brother, I agree that non-muslims do talk about things that are sinful as per Islamic standards. therefore muslims should distance themselves from them. But at the same time, there are almost equal no. of muslims who are worse than non-muslims in talking about sinful things. In my opinion those muslims are worse than their non-muslim counterparts, coz at least non-muslims dont believe their actions as sinful.

So my humble questions is, should good muslims like brother jameel maintain equal distance with those muslims too? or parameter of tolrance should be decided only in accordance with names, I mean if someone with a non-muslim name is doing sinful things a good muslim like brother jameel should HATE his company and brand all non-muslim like him, and if someone with a muslim name is doing same acts than brother jameel should remember that hatred is unislamic?:-\

Regards.

 

[Muhammad]

Greetings justahumane,

If I am not mistaken, a Muslim who performs sinful actions and acknowledges those actions as being sinful is better than a Muslim who does not believe he is commiting a sin by doing them. This is because the first type of person will accept the Islamic rulings and will perhaps simply be suffering from weak faith, whereas the other person will be rejecting the teachings of Islam.

So if we had two people who drank alcohol: one a non-Muslim and the other a Muslim, then a good Muslim will have a common ground with the sinful Muslim because they both believe in Allaah, so this reduces the distance between them and allows the good Muslim to advise his brother and help him to become stronger in faith. With a non-Muslim, more effort would be needed to first explain what Islam is before advising the abstinence from alcohol. So we can see that the two are very different people and in my opinion, equal distancing is not befitting for this reason.

I mean if someone with a non-muslim name is doing sinful things a good muslim like brother jameel should HATE his company and brand all non-muslim like him

A good Muslim should hate the action, and not brand all non-Muslims on the basis of one person.

And Allaah Knows best.

 

[shanu]

Assalamu alaikum
i wrote the whole intrepration in a previous forum i shall give u the link and paste it here

Assalamu alaikum
I was reading through the surah 5 of the Quran

And in the translation i saw this part

Quote:

005.054 O ye who believe! take not the Jews and the Christians for your friends and protectors: They are but friends and protectors to each other. And he amongst you that turns to them (for friendship) is of them. Verily God guideth not a people unjust.

Then i was wondering, how come? As i clearly know that Allah is not unjust
then i read the other parts

Quote:

005.058 Your (real) friends are (no less than) God, His Apostle, and the (fellowship of) believers,- those who establish regular prayers and regular charity, and they bow down humbly (in worship).

005.059 As to those who turn (for friendship) to God, His Apostle, and the (fellowship of) believers,- it is the fellowship of God that must certainly triumph.

005.060 O ye who believe! take not for friends and protectors those who take your religion for a mockery or sport,- whether among those who received the Scripture before you, or among those who reject Faith; but fear ye God, if ye have faith (indeed).

005.061 When ye proclaim your call to prayer they take it (but) as mockery and sport; that is because they are a people without understanding.

-----

Then only i realised, what the surah was saying that we are not to take friends who mock our faith and religion, as if we move with them, we begin to lose faith in ourselves. And this was not referring to peaceful Christians and jews who dont mock us for our religion, and we can be friends with them.



Quote:
005.085 Strongest among men in enmity to the believers wilt thou find the Jews and Pagans; and nearest among them in love to the believers wilt thou find those who say, "We are Christians": because amongst these are men devoted to learning and men who have renounced the world, and they are not arrogant.

005.086 And when they listen to the revelation received by the Apostle, thou wilt see their eyes overflowing with tears, for they recognise the truth: they pray: "Our Lord! we believe; write us down among the witnesses.

005.087 "What cause can we have not to believe in God and the truth which has come to us, seeing that we long for our Lord to admit us to the company of the righteous?"

005.088 And for this their prayer hath God rewarded them with gardens, with rivers flowing underneath,- their eternal home. Such is the recompense of those who do good.

I started reading because i have an old uncle in london who says that we are not to have friends from other faith, I found this a little extreme, as i have full faith that Allah is most just. Well from what i understand here, The Quran actually referred to "friends" who mock our religion and make fun of us, and make us feel low abt ourselves. Truly, they cant be friends at all, as friends are those who support one another no matter where they come from. Friends are those who support and believe in us. Like for an example, a christian who does nothing to shake ur faith in ur religion, andwho doesnt mock you and support you when help is needed. Now that is what this is reffering to.

One fine example is our Prophet Mohammed pbuh, a man who lived like a walking Quran.

It was in Madinah that the Prophet (PBUH) received envoys and emissaries from various tribes and nationals, asking matters of various sorts, demanding dialogues, negotiations etc. Among the emissaries were an envoy representing the Christian community in Najran (South Arabia). The Prophet (PBUH) welcomed them, entertained them as honoured guests and even allowed them to conduct their religious service in his city.

It was a good occasion to share each other's views on matters of religion. Some members of the envoy were deeply impressed by the treatment they received from the Muslims, thus leading them to embrace Islam.

Some people take a dim view on islam, as they feel we were told to hate christians and jews, and not take them as friends. As you can see from above, The prophet treated them kindly and didnt kill them nor hate them for the differnt faiths they emerge from, Instead, he embraced them and treated them with honour. Like i said earlier, what they are reffering to is people who mock you and make you feel stupid. Such are not friends at all. There are even Christians in this forum who speak kindly to us, furthermore some of us muslims today were jews and christians before.

Allah knows best

Peace on you all

 

[Hijrah]

I can understand what many of you are saying about dealing with non-muslims but some of them i am not so sure about, it is obviously wrong to integrate and become like them but what about just simply being friends with them, some of the sites i am seeing such as the one zubair posted says that such friendship is allowed and permissible, but other sites such as islamqa say that we can not be "friends" with them even in the general terms. as for that islamtoday link, it is obviously possible to not hate someone but at the same time not befriend them, so my question is in the general term friends, is such a relationship allowed between a Muslim and kaafir and to what extent can it go?

in the past this kind of issue has confused me, i remember at one summer program i attended when i was younger, they even said we should hate the kuffar in our hearts but at the same time be nice to them, i went back home and told my fam and friends this and they got pretty mad, the person who said it was not a scholar either and another teacher at an Islaamic school said that to hate Allaah's creation in such a way is wrong.

 

[Woodrow]

It all depends on how we view people. We can look and see an enemy of Islam in every person who is not Muslim or we can look and see a chance to share our love of Islam.

Remember without Kafir in this world we would not have the gift of giving Da'wah. By giving Da'wah we are sharing the greatest thing we have with a non-Believer. Do we give gifts to those we hate?

The word Friend has so many connontations, perhaps we are in need of a new word that reflects how we can care about people that are not Muslim.

We need to have some type of care about non-Muslims if we truly desire that they learn the Joy and love of Islam.

 

[Grace Seeker]

I can understand what many of you are saying about dealing with non-muslims but some of them i am not so sure about, it is obviously wrong to integrate and become like them but what about just simply being friends with them, some of the sites i am seeing such as the one zubair posted says that such friendship is allowed and permissible, but other sites such as islamqa say that we can not be "friends" with them even in the general terms. as for that islamtoday link, it is obviously possible to not hate someone but at the same time not befriend them, so my question is in the general term friends, is such a relationship allowed between a Muslim and kaafir and to what extent can it go?

in the past this kind of issue has confused me, i remember at one summer program i attended when i was younger, they even said we should hate the kuffar in our hearts but at the same time be nice to them, i went back home and told my fam and friends this and they got pretty mad, the person who said it was not a scholar either and another teacher at an Islaamic school said that to hate Allaah's creation in such a way is wrong.

How about a non-Muslim reply? I have read all the posts and links. And I have Muslim friends. Some of these friends are just mere acquaintances, people I am friendly with, but I couldn't even tell you their full name. Others are so close as to have become family. And no Imam has suggested that those relationships be severed.

The problem you are having comes as a result of two things, the inherent problem of translation that is present in any language, not just Arabic. But the other is cultural context. Because even with a good translation, the cutlural context has changed so much since the Qu'ran's writing as to require a second level of interpretaion even if you were a native Arabic speaker. As you are from the USA, I will try to put what I got out of all of those links in a 21st century American cultural context.

You know how one group of people in the USA will use the term "brother" or "sister" differently from another group. Both Muslims and Christians use the terms to refer to other members of their own communities. The terms are of course used within families to refer to siblings. And the term is sometimes used by black Americans to simply refer to any other black American, even if completely unknown to one another. So, too this Arabic term that is translated "friend" can have different meanings depending on who is using it and how.

It seems to me, that Muhammad is saying that one can have relationships with non-Muslims, but that one's primary identity is still to be a Muslim and thus one's closest affilations should naturally be among those that today you refer to as a "brother" or "sister" in Islam. That does not preclude you from having friendships outside the Ummah, but that these should be secondary to those you have within the Ummah, excepting those relationships that help you to share Islam with others.

Now, I will accept correction, but that is the gist of what I get from the totality of the discussion.

 

[aamirsaab]

Since primary school, I've had non-muslim friends. I still do to this day.

I don't discriminate based on creed, colour, race or gender. Only on actions.

hmm, I wonder just how many people I've ticked off with this post. A high number would really make me laugh.

 

[truthbetold]

Grace Seeker...here is a non-muslim reply, such as you have requested. I recently began a new career about 2 years ago in a strictly commission based field. Things were very slow for me and I had very little knowledge. Then one day I befriended a Muslim who was willing to teach me a great amount and even take me on as a business parter. Because of her kindness,patience, and generosity, I have been much more successful than I ever would have been on my own. I shared similar political views, such as agreement to the horrendous situation in Palestine and the apparent war against Islam going on in the world today, but I was still amazed at her and her families willingness to be so warm and helpful to someone of another faith(Judiasm) Perhaps I was so shocked because since they are Palestinian, I feared they may somehow hold deep hatred for a Jew, considering the situation in Israel/Palestine and the hardships their family has suffered at the hands of...my people....so to say. Im getting off topic with this but my point is that I am very grateful for the fact that they had a great understanding of their religion and were open to taking a non-believer as a friend and business associate. Occassionally she would teach me certain aspects of Islam and sayings of the Prophet(PBUH), never forcing her beliefs on me but simply engaging me in conversation and opening up my mind to a religion I've had almost no knowledge of. Also a few months ago I met another Muslim who had actually never even spoken to a Jew before and was very surprised to see how well we were able to get along. They were kind enough to give me the Quran as a gift one day and I have been reading it on a daily basis and learning as much about Islam as possible. I was never very much in tune with or compelled to my religion and I feel like Islam is something which I will one day be able to fully embrace. Sorry for the long and boring story but I guess my whole point is that if these people didnt take it upon themselves to be kind and friendly to a non-believer, then I probably be in a terrible financial situation, have 2 less friends, and still be completely in the dark about such a beautiful religion(Islam)

 

[truthbetold]

sorry Grace Seeker....after reading your post I realize now that you WERE the non-muslim reply. i will read a little more carefully next time but atleast now my story has been shared to anyone who may find it of interest.

 

[SoyBoricua]

I won't go into why Arabic was selected However the same problem exists in all languages. No language can be translatered accuratly into another language. Often a literal word translation results in the wrong meaning, or trying to express the meaning results in the wrong word. Some modern examples: There is no English word for the German word Weltgeist. The English word for a speed bump in the road comes out as a sleeping policeman in chinese. The conscept of a non-conformist in Chines translates into English as an unbridled horse.


3:28. Let not the believers Take for friends or helpers Unbelievers rather than believers: if any do that, in nothing will there be help from Allah: except by way of precaution, that ye may Guard yourselves from them. But Allah cautions you (To remember) Himself; for the final goal is to Allah. S P C

Yusuf Ali's Quran Translation


4:139. Yea, to those who take for friends unbelievers rather than believers: is it honour they seek among them? Nay,- all honour is with Allah. S P C

Yusuf Ali's Quran Translation

4:144. O ye who believe! Take not for friends unbelievers rather than believers: Do ye wish to offer Allah an open proof against yourselves? S P

Yusuf Ali's Quran Translation

Show me where any of those say we are forbidden to have a non-believer as a friend. Don't they all just say that we should not value a non-believer over a believer? Can you see any reason why we should not be forbidden to value non-believers over a believer. Is that not the same as saying to a Christian that he should not place non-Christians over his fellow Christians?

Umm... Nope it is not! Not by any stretch of the imagination! In fact when it comes to Christians the message is of love and compassion for all regardless.

 

[Woodrow]

Umm... Nope it is not! Not by any stretch of the imagination! In fact when it comes to Christians the message is of love and compassion for all regardless.

That is true, but having love and compassion for all people is not the same as having all people as close associates. Would you not prefer to have people that share things in common as close associates?

 

[Grace Seeker]

Woodrow,

Actually the only time I can think of Christian being counseled to not associate with non-Christians is the following verse:

2 Corinthians 6

14Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common? Or what fellowship can light have with darkness? 15What harmony is there between Christ and Belial? What does a believer have in common with an unbeliever? 16What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols? For we are the temple of the living God. As God has said: "I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people."

Of course, it is a pretty strong verse. Christians have been arguing with one another over how to interpret it ever since Paul wrote it. Some understand it to mean not to marry a non-Christian (of course many do). Some think it means not to hang around with non-Christians as your best buds (of course many Christians do that as well). Some don't understand it, and prefer just to ignore it.

Personally, I think it is cautioning against any sort of involvement that one cannot walk away from if one needs to. And, for me, the reasoning is simple: non-Christians will get involved in things that Christians know and understand that they should not. In those circumstances we need to be free to walk away and not be a part of such unrighteous (the Muslim would say "haraam") behavior. If one is yoked, like cattle are yoked, then one is lock in and may not be able to avoid it. So, don't be yoked to non-Christians. Beyond that, one is free to associate with whomever, as long as one practices Christian living at the same time.

 

[Woodrow]

Peace,

We are just having a difference of semantics over the words, associate, associated etc. I think I can express what I mean with in this manner.

We will always associate with our associates. However, some people we associate with may not be our associates. Who we are willing to associate with, may not always be a person we would have as an associate.

The word associate carries a stronger connotation than saying a person we associate with. In order to have a person as an associate, there has to be much sharing of something in common.

I think the best example would be if say you and I were neighbors and good friends. Although we enjoy each others company and have respect for each other. Who would you prefer to teach your children about Christianity, me or the Pastor of your Church.

That is one example about what I meant about Christians not having non-Christians as associates, same for us as not having non-Muslims as associates. We can associate with each other, but we would never be able to be actual associates in many areas.