the Halal way to get married

[Ummu Sufyaan]

its your weding- youll probably only do it once-so do it the right way and the way u believe is best and rewarding

well actually its her wedding as well.

ahkee, i think you should sit and talk with her/her family/your family. try get across what you want and let them put across what they want and from that, try to compromise and reach a "middle way" where BOTH sides are happy and comfortable. if she wants a big shindig tell her what your uncomfortable with/and why you don't want it (show her hadiths, etc) but at the same time, make sure she is happy. as long as no haram/extravagance is done then i really do think you should take consideration of what she/her family want. after all it is her wedding as well.

 

[Ar-RaYYan]

How much should it be then??

:mmokay:

Maybe more than a £10 note:rollseyes

 

[AlbanianMuslim]

wow lots of info on here, thanks


i personally, used to want a big wedding because i grew up going to these huge weddings and unfortunatly bought into the whole "western" mentality that you NEED the expensive white dresss, NEED the hall, NEED the live music etc
But none of that is ANY guarantee that the marriage will work, and often it leaves you with a big dent in your bank account, some people even end up in debt from their lavish weddings....
wouldnt you rather have that money put away as an emergency fund? or use it to start building your future together?
Even if you have money to toss around, in a way, buying all that is almost like selling your soul to shaytan.


I no longer want or feel i need that huge lavish wedding. My parents and i agreed that when i get married inshallah, ill be able to have a bridal shower, in albania we call it Womens Day, when all the women get together and the bride to be wears the traditional costume.
No alcohol, no men, etc..... and thats it. Perfectly fine with that.



I think a lot of people have lost sight of what marriage really means, instead they get so focused on the wedding and parties, gifts etc, instead of preparing for what comes after.

 

[- IqRa -]

I dont have much to add to this thread, inshallah i'll let someone else take over, but i think you should still go with tradition. I don't see why that should be a problem, just make sure it doesn't contradict the quran and sunnah and isnt overally extravagant, etc.

btw, whats the difference between the wedding and walima? they sound exactly the same :?

wedding - when the guy goes to the girls house to get her/when the girl goes to the guys house
walima - when the girl is in the guys house a day after the wedding