You are Single, not Dead.

[~Zaria~]

You are Single Not Dead​

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Being single does not mean that you are weak, it's mean you are strong enough to wait for what you really deserve. If you are happy and confident, you are more likely to attract the right person into your life in the first place. And most importantly when Allah (God) knows you’re ready for the responsibility of commitment, He will reveal the right person under the right circumstances. You are not going to displease Allah if you’re single (by Qadar). But you may displease Allah by your lack of thankfulness and weakness in your reliance (tawakul) in Him and giving up on life altogether. Wait patiently and be optimistic.

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Some people are single but they are mentally committed to someone. That’s not very healthy for your faith.
It’s all upto Allah. The All-Wise, The Master who knows the secrets of your hearts even if you don’t mention them, The One who knows his weaknesses and your weaknesses and how this combination would destroy your and his life, He wouldn't let us suffer like that. You need to be patient and have faith that He will provide for you. He will give you better. He will make you happy again. He will do that because He is so Merciful. You need to trust Him.


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You need to put your faith in the One who created you. Don’t waste your time searching and wishing. One day someone's gonna walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else! Grow, be patient and be ready, you’ll see Allah will give you a love story far better than you could ever dream of.

Single and upset?
You might be not married to any man, like Maryam [Mary] (Allah Be Pleased With Her) and Allah can make your rank higher than any women on the Earth. Know your priorities. Love and trust is with Allah first.​

Yes it is fact that there are many advantages to being in a relationship or marriage, but do not worry or fret if you are still single. Not everything is within our control and sometimes we do have to accept fate. So, why worry unnecessarily over something that we do not have control over?

Do not let being single thought traped you, make you a slave to the idea of finding someone, deprive you of your ability to enjoy life and cause desperation, depression, and fear. Don’t forget that your life does not end if certain things don’t come your way. Did Allah say anywhere in the Quran and Sunnah that you are worthless if you don’t get married? Being single is not a death sentence, it has own charm you enjoy life in your own way, you get more time to be with yourself, to do a variety of things, indeed you have relationship with freedom. You have lots to do, you have yourself, your friends, your family, and you have Allah. Get out of your mental cage, make your life’s vehicle move on.

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You are still single because it’s all up to Allah (God), our future partners have or have not been already determined 50,000 years ago before this world existed. It’s because of His wisdom that you’re still single. So don’t think you care for yourself more than Allah cares for you! Appreciate His wisdom.

Don’t worry too much, to have a positive attitude and enjoy your single life. Whether you are in a relationship or not, you want to be happy. If you aren't happy single, then you won't be happy taken. Happiness comes from within not from anybody else. Research shows that the number one ingredient for happiness, by far, is optimism, so change your approach learn to have more fun be happy and enjoy your life either your are single or not.

http://assmkhan.blogspot.com/​

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[Periwinkle18]

OMG this is so good jazakAllah for sharing

So don’t think you care for yourself more than Allah cares for you!

i never thought abt it this way. thanks alot will share it with my frnds too

 

[Haya emaan]

MashaAllah. this is very very beneficial article. some thing today's youth should really think of..
JazakAllah sister for sharing it

i see girls around whose life is only centered around 'finding or waiting for their prince'. it seems like this is the only goal they are for this world and their life will end with marriage. Subhanallah! there is so much more to do in this short life.
and the most sad part is sometimes there failure in 'finding their dream prince' leads them to wrong pathsimsad

 

[Who Am I?]

Must... not... comment...

 

[Karimah]

Very awesome article. Something to definitely keep in mind. I saw a little picture just the other day talking about how Allah (swt) already has written the names of our spouse and we should worry instead more about our relationship with Allah (swt). Thank you for sharing.

 

[~Zaria~]

Assalamu-alaikum everyone,

I think that too many of us have fallen in the trap of the Age of 'Romantiscm'.

We have been fed on fairytales of princes and princesses, illicit loves, 'unrequited' love, love that is 'worth dying for'.......from as far as we can remember.

Re-inforced over and over again by Hollywood/ Bollywood, novelists such as Shakespear, Thomas Hardy, Jane Austen, etc.

And we WANT what we see in the movies, and read in these books.

Often, the institution of marriage is not even half as appealing......as is the psychological 'Bed of Roses' that we have created for ourselves.


And thus, we find lyrics such as these so appealing:

"I'd catch a grenade for you
Throw my hand on a blade for you
I'd jump in front of a train for you
You know I'd do anything for you
I would go through all this pain
Take a bullet straight through my brain
Yes, I would die for you, baby
But you won't do the same......"

Bruno Mars: Grenade


​

"And I will love you, baby - Always
And I'll be there forever and a day - Always
I'll be there till the stars don't shine
Till the heavens burst and
The words don't rhyme
And I know when I die, you'll be on my mind
And I'll love you - Always

.........

If you told me to cry for you
I could
If you told me to die for you
I would
Take a look at my face
There's no price I won't pay
To say these words to you....."

Bon Jovi: Always



​

Do you see how unhealthy and unrealistic such love is?

This is not the type of love that we should be seeking.
But the love of Allah (subhanawata'ala) and His rasul (sallahu alaihi wasalam).......BEFORE anything else.

What sukoon/ peace and tranquility settles in the heart of the one who has made ALLAH his BELOVED.

Chase the beautiful faces of this world, and the temporary ecstasy of forbidden and illicit love......It can never compare to that which is felt by an Aashiq of Allah.



To my brothers and sisters, who are despairing from finding their marriage partners and completing half their deen:

Be patient.
And place your complete trust in Allah.
His plan for you is the BEST plan......dont ever doubt that.
That which is with-held from you now......is in your own interest......perhaps He is warding you from a greater harm (e.g marriage to the wrong person, that may weaken your imaan).

And if you are never to find that special someone - fret not in these few years on this dunya.
What about all that you HAVE been blessed with?.....we cannot even enumerate these! Alhamdulillah.

Do not resort to haraam means in seeking marriage.....no good can come of that which has its foundations in the displeasure of Allah.


And constantly make duaa:





Our Lord! Grant us good in this world and good in the life to come and keep us safe from the torment of the Fire (2:201)







Our Lord! In You we have placed our trust, and to You do we turn in repentance, for unto You is the end of all journeys. (60:4)



Ameen.


Salaam
​

 

[ardianto]

i see girls around whose life is only centered around 'finding or waiting for their prince'.

Do not expect a prince, but create a king.

Assalamualaikum.

One factor that made women not able to get married is because they expect a prince. And they stuck in this expectation. It will make them refuse every ordinary man who propose a marriage, just because this ordinary man didn't meet criteria of their expected prince.

Maybe not every woman realize, open the heart for future husband is different than open a job opportunity. If a company open a job opportunity and announce special criteria like graduated from top universities, has 5 years work experience, etc, it will make job seekers who meet this criteria come to this company.

But if a woman open the heart for future husband, but she announce a high criteria of expected husband like handsome, tall, rich, it will make man who meet this criteria doubt to propose a marriage because he afraid this woman will reject or leave him if she meet another man who better than him.

Men know they are not perfect, and they expect women can accept their imperfection.

Men love if their wives accept them as ordinary persons who have their own advantages and disadvantages. And uniquely, men also love if their wives treat them like a king. If a woman treat her husband as a king, Inshaallah, her husband will treat her as a queen.

So, do not expect a prince, but accept an ordinary man as your husband, and make him as your king.

 

[SeekingJoy]

Hey,

Let me to ask a few questions.

Humans are born/created with feelings, that they are able to control
as they will. They have the right to feel their feelings to anyone, for
example: hate, love, happiness, suffering.

Why would God tell you what to feel, and what not? Why would he tell
you who to choose? Didn't he created you to his own face? If he did,
then why can't/don't you know what's right and what's not? Why couldn't
you live as the same life with one man like with another one?

I'm looking forward to hearing from you,
SeekingJoy

 

[Silent Peace]

One factor that made women not able to get married is because they expect a prince. And they stuck in this expectation. It will make them refuse every ordinary man who propose a marriage, just because this ordinary man didn't meet criteria of their expected prince.

Well Said Bro.

 

[CosmicPathos]

One factor that made women not able to get married is because they expect a prince. And they stuck in this expectation. It will make them refuse every ordinary man who propose a marriage, just because this ordinary man didn't meet criteria of their expected prince.

Wah bro. I am a Prince and I am still single. I think my shining armor is too shiny for the princesses' eyes, and hence they cant see my face.

 

[cOsMiCiNtUiTiOn]

You need to put your faith in the One who created you. Don’t waste your time searching and wishing. One day someone's gonna walk into your life and make you realize why it never worked out with anyone else! Grow, be patient and be ready, you’ll see Allah will give you a love story far better than you could ever dream of.​

100% Agree with u on this part :statisfie

 

[cOsMiCiNtUiTiOn]

Well Said Bro.

^^ Agreed.

Hey,

Let me to ask a few questions.

Humans are born/created with feelings, that they are able to control
as they will. They have the right to feel their feelings to anyone, for
example: hate, love, happiness, suffering.

Why would God tell you what to feel, and what not? Why would he tell
you who to choose? Didn't he created you to his own face? If he did,
then why can't/don't you know what's right and what's not? Why couldn't
you live as the same life with one man like with another one?

I'm looking forward to hearing from you,
SeekingJoy

First, he didn't create man in his own face or image. He created man in his image, which is in HIS imagination, HIS vision, that is why we are HIS creation.

Second, he doesn't tell you what to feel or towards whom, you choose this, and your choice will reflect the state of your heart and where your heart is. We are the progeny of Adam, and only Adam was given the capability of choosing and sacrificing for the sake of Allah. So when your heart is with HIM, you choose based on what you know brings him pleasure, because that is what you ultimately desire. That is how you properly choose a spouse. Marriage is about completing half of your deen, this person will support you and you will support them through this journey and inshaAllah, you will have a pleasant time in the Akhira.

If you don't lose sight of the akhira (the hereafter) and your goal and focus is there, That is where/how you find true love. Find the person whom's heart is where yours is and you will see fireworks There's this saying I really like " A woman's heart should be so lost in Allah, that a man has to seek HIM to find her."

-cOsMiC

 

[ardianto]

Wah bro. I am a Prince and I am still single. I think my shining armor is too shiny for the princesses' eyes, and hence they cant see my face.

And I married a princess because I was not a prince with shining armor, but just an ordinary man who could love my wife, not only love her beauty.

There were many men who tried to get her as wife, from company president until taxi driver. Some of them were more handsome than me, and rich. They acted like a prince, praised her, ranted what they had and what they could give to her. But she could feel, those men only love her beauty.

Women want to look beautiful, but they do not want men treat them like pretty doll that could be left after those men start to getting bored.

Women are fascinated by the handsome prince with shining armor. Some women expect to have a prince like this that will make them proud. But mostly women prefer to have an ordinary man who could be a prince only for themselves, not for all women. Have a prince that fascinating all women will make a woman feel "insecure", she afraid another woman will grab her prince.

So, do not feel inferior if you are not a prince with shining armor, do not lose your hope to get a wife who could love you. As long as you are able to love someone, someone will love you too.

 

[Who Am I?]

My armor is rusty and my sword is dull.

I think my horse ran off with my dog.

 

[TrueStranger]

My armor is rusty and my sword is dull.

I think my horse ran off with my dog.

LOL!

I just don't understand how anyone could worry about being single when we have 7 billion people living on earth. Not to forget how easy it is to know someone these days. The options are endless and the opportunities are much better than those one had half a century ago.

But, at the end of the day, one gets married when Allah wills. So till then eat, drink, and go to school or get a job.

 

[CosmicPathos]

My armor is rusty and my sword is dull.

I think my horse ran off with my dog.

and my castle is my parents' basement.

 

[real islam]

Very awesome article. Something to definitely keep in mind. I saw a little picture just the other day talking about how Allah (swt) already has written the names of our spouse and we should worry instead more about our relationship with Allah (swt). Thank you for sharing.

Thanks for the song of Bon Jube.I like his song.
Oo ho Is singing haram in Islam?

 

[truthseeker63]

Im a Young Man/Male and Im single and I love Women I hate being single this is why Im trying to take better care of myself Im on a diet now.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Romance_(love

 

[tigerkhan]

Assalamualaikum.

One factor that made women not able to get married is because they expect a prince. And they stuck in this expectation. It will make them refuse every ordinary man who propose a marriage, just because this ordinary man didn't meet criteria of their expected prince.

Maybe not every woman realize, open the heart for future husband is different than open a job opportunity. If a company open a job opportunity and announce special criteria like graduated from top universities, has 5 years work experience, etc, it will make job seekers who meet this criteria come to this company.

But if a woman open the heart for future husband, but she announce a high criteria of expected husband like handsome, tall, rich, it will make man who meet this criteria doubt to propose a marriage because he afraid this woman will reject or leave him if she meet another man who better than him.

Men know they are not perfect, and they expect women can accept their imperfection.

Men love if their wives accept them as ordinary persons who have their own advantages and disadvantages. And uniquely, men also love if their wives treat them like a king. If a woman treat her husband as a king, Inshaallah, her husband will treat her as a queen.

So, do not expect a prince, but accept an ordinary man as your husband, and make him as your king.

i think its not only women but men also bcm idealistic most of time. its all bcz of weakness of iman that we prefer worldly things much while searching for partner. i see many boys refusing proposal bcz girl is not attractive. same is case on other side, girls refuses mostly bcz boy is not well paid or not so dashing.

 

[Who Am I?]

and my castle is my parents' basement.

Well, it used to be.